Monogamy is a lifestyle choice. It's not in anyone's DNA.
Commitment is (behavior) in accordance with one's vow or promise.
Lots of people are married but aren't "committed" to their spouse.
The truth is when we're (young) most of us are too immature, shortsighted, and have far too many unrealistic expectations to be in any long-term union for a significant length of time. We get bored easily.
Every year countless college freshmen arrive on campus believing they're going to maintain a long distance relationship with their high school sweetheart for the next 4-6 years while they pursue their degrees at different universities. After about one semester of simply going to classes, studying in the library, and sleeping in their dorm room they began to make new friends. This leads to attending dances/parties, going to sporting events, and possibly considering pledging a fraternity or sorority.
Socialization usually leads to dating or at the very least there is a desire to be involved with someone who actually located where you are.
It's very common for them to either cheat or breakup with their high school sweetheart. It's not as if they "planned" it. They were just too immature to realize being a teenager maintaining a long distance relationship for 4-6 years was unrealistic!
Another reason why people cheat is because they become exclusive with someone in order to {be with them} because she/he demands it of them. Essentially it's not what the (cheater) actually {wanted }but they want to be with her or him so they "attempt" to be monogamous. However once the "infatuation phase" has worn off they're willing to "risk" it by cheating. At this point they already feel the relationship is almost over.
The goal of most cheaters is to hold onto all that is "good" in their primary relationship while addressing their other "needs" on the side.
Very few cheaters are looking to (replace) one relationship with another.
There are three basic types of cheaters
1. The Incessant Cheater
This person has never been faithful in any long-term relationship.
There motto is: "Variety is the spice of life!"
This person gets bored very easily.
They're always looking for the thrill of being with someone "new".
2. The Unbelievable Opportunity Cheater
This person is not "proactively" looking to cheat.
They may have a secret crush on someone or have fantasized about them.
One day the person they're crushing/thinks is hot actually hits on them!
Maybe they're away on a business trip or in some other scenario where it's very unlikely their mate will find out. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity!
Sometimes it can happen due to "peer pressure" while out with the guys or the girls in a bar/nightclub. Their friends egg them on to "go for it".
This type of cheater may feel guilty later and confess weeks/months later.
Their crime was "Giving in to temptation!"
3. The Discontented Cheater
This person blames YOU!
If (YOU) hadn't done or stopped doing whatever... they never would have stepped outside of the relationship! It's not uncommon for a betrayed person to buy into this logic and offer to forgive the cheater.
The truth however is monogamy and cheating are (choices) the "individual" makes. You don't "make someone cheat". They (choose) to cheat! Note: They weren't "unhappy enough" to breakup with you!
Cheating is about (breaking the rules) in a selfish attempt to have it all!
Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself
Most guys aren't ready to settle down or consider marriage until they're in their late 20s or early 30s. We live in a day and age where there are lots of women as well as men who are content with a "friends with benefits" or "booty call" no strings attached arrangement. There's really no reason for anyone to either attempt to settle down or fake settling down if they're not really ready to do so. Trying to do or be someone you're not hurts people.
There are three reasons why people don't cheat
1. They are (in love) with their mate /spouse! (Not just caring about them)
2. They don't want to risk blowing it by getting caught. (Fear of loss)
3. They know how hurt they would feel (if their mate cheated) on them.
"Monogamy becomes boring when couples become lazy." Anonymous
"The grass is always greener on the side you water." Michelle Obama
