Marriage is being attacked once again.
It would be helpful if the religious would get over it.
Marriage is larger than the church or pathetic religious views of individuals.
Marriage is no longer JUST a religious doctrine and it would be really nice if people finally accepted that.
Unfortunately, the religious will continue to harp on things that do not need to be addressed, because they themselves feel the righteousness their religion affords them to invade other people's life.
So marriage is stupid and "free love" ie. broken homes, fatherless children, and destruction of the entire basic family unit, should be the norm. Got it.
It is the norm. Whether you like it or not. Look around you.
I didn't say it isn't the norm, but it seems to me that he is implying that it should be.
It shouldn't, but it is. You can almost guess what the Future of mankind is going to be. LOL
Hey Onusonus, I can see there is no discussing anything with you, which is something learned from previous forum posts you have made, so I am sure that you love to imply things that are completely out of whack and this is not any different.
Am I promoting what you claim I am. No actually. But, when you look at much of society, people are becoming more ignorant by choice. They refuse to learn and since teaching them anything is more difficult than it use to be, there is nothing in your discussion worth it.
However, I am sure you'll spin whatever I say anyways, which is nothing new for you, but be my guest.
Nice backpeddeling dude, glad to see you are against it, but darn this socioty that we live in anyway, I guess we'll have to roll with the punches!
So...just don't get caught up in it. live your life they way you want to. there are many websites and the media promoting and sensationalizing a lot of different ideas...but...unless i'm truly interested in a subject, i'll take a look, if not, i don't look because i just might not care.
In relation to this particular subject, the dating sights are probably a place for some married people to connect anyway. It's been going on for a long time - this isn't anything new - the newspaper personals...people hire prostitutes (large % are married), etc. etc. - so really, none of this is new, they are just 'named it for what it is'.
I don't believe the website will persuade people to change their values or beliefs (whatever they are). And...the media just promoted it even though the guy interviewing the owner of the site was clearly against the concept. Dah? Free advertising, but then again, maybe it really wasn't the media and just a video produced for the net to market it...i don't care though....
That may be, but if there is a quick and easy way to cheat, people might have that factor added to their decision making process. I think that more people will be inclined to cheat if they know how easy it is to do so.
Just like internet porn, it's that much easier to access when it's right there at your fingertips. Somone who would never go to the store to buy a filthy magazine will be more tempted to look at nudey pics on the glowing box in front of them.
don't agree with you on that - maybe weak minded people that follow rather than lead will be tempted to act; but weak minded people are a part of life; they follow all kinds of ideas etc. rather than having their own belief systems; i just live my life and block out the crap that doesn't interest me.
again, most people will follow their belief/value system as they always have (whatever that looks like) whether the internet is there or not.
there has always been quick and easy ways to cheat - has been happening much longer than when internet sites were established - it's always been there and it's not going to go away. I don't condone cheating, but I'm not going to tell people what to do or not to do. Just don't cheat on me....or.....
As for internet porn - yea it's there - i have no temptation to look. i don't have a problem with porn either by the way - except maybe the hard core and harmful types. but that's my choice. And...i don't care what people think about that either. I'm a good person, i know that and that's all that counts when it comes right down to it.
I can't worry about what other people are doing (except for my loved ones) - i have too much in my own life to contend without worrying about what my neighbour is doing or not doing.
Actually it takes a lot of integrity and discipline to live by the precepts of God, (one of those precepts being fidelity.) It seems to me that believing in something is the unpopular thing on this website, but despite the 100% opposition that I've been given over the last three hours, I will continue to weigh out the facts, seek out the praisworthy, and oppose the frivelous and unwholesome idelolgy that oppresses the human spirit.
To be weak minded is to allow yourself to be lead off the true course of happiness which is the light of Christ whose paths are straight and just.
i'm not sure what you are saying. I don't recall indicating that you shouldn't believe in anything. And if I did, I apologize for the misunderstanding.
I'm opposed to thinking that people can't continue to follow their belief/value system whatever that is, including spiritual beliefs (all spiritual beliefs), because someone developed an internet site on a topic that is rather stupid in the first place. That is how this discussion started.
And Onusonus, you don't know what I believe in do you?
I do not agree with people having to get married, to form a family. It's ridiculous. It is also ridiculous that those who cannot control their sexual urges, so that they do cheat on their mate.
It's not about backpeddling anywhere. It's not about religion is my point. It is about understanding, having the wisdom knowledge that is required about life. Those who do not know, are the ones that are completely lost and have absolutely no clue.
A website about cheaters??? Who cares? I mean, really. It is not like it really matters. There are over 300 BILLION websites online, and unless they do some HUGE marketing about it....it's going to be a dead website.
So you are against marriage and you are against cheating? That is a mixture for a sandy foundation to build one's house.
I believe what he said is that people make a marriage. They can choose to make it work or not as suits them but the idea that you can only be a family "through marriage in the eyes of the church" is archaic and has little to do with reality in today's society.
Well he is absolutely right that the idea of marriage is against the worldly point of view, that's why I posted in the religious forum. In reality though there is a Heaven and a Hell and God created everything, including marriage, if it were not so, and the children of God abandoned this core precept of life, the entire Earth, past and present, would be an utter waste.
It is nice to see that you are not particular about whose words you twist. I did not say the idea of marriage was against the worldly point of view. I said that it does not take the sanctity of a blessing from the church to create a marriage.
I agree with Ohma. And to further the point, marriage isn't just a creation of the church. What people "shouldn't" do is a subjective argument, prone to all kinds of contentious outbursts. If marriage is defined as a union between man and woman only for the purpose of raising a family, then so be it. But there is no equality in it, so every other form of joining lives and making unions between people for the purpose of love and family is not a mockery, it's the same thing, whether or not anyone wants to believe it.
Further, how is "living in sin" a bad thing when the same goals are made as those who have a piece of paper saying they are "married"? Both are subject to the same risks in life. Divorce is just as frequent and splits.
Sure thing, Daniel.
Going by that liberal view, then it only makes sense that, say, a devoted son who takes care of his aging parent, no sex involved at alll, should be allowed to marry that person. After all, it's about "love and family" as you put it.
And of course two people of any gender(s) should be allowed to marry, even if they're only looking for family-type companionship or sharing housing because of compassion for each other's financial and emotional needs.
And so on and so on. Not to mention, of course, that those people should have the right to all the rights that traditional-marrieds have, including but not limited to tax write-offs, health-care options, the ability to call each other "hubby" and "wife" even if it doesn't match their genders. There should, of course, be NO limits upon those "rights", I don't care if it's an uncle who marries his nephew or a sister who marries her brother, etc., No limits! Freedom! (Actually a free-for-all-chaos!) And if anyone opposes these "rights", it should be considered hate speech of course of course of course, and so on and so on.
Quite a ball ya got rolling there about tolerance and fairness. We might as well just all accept socialism and forget about individual rights, 'cause that's what it will all lead to.
It will lead to divorced women living in sin and preaching god's word against what the bible instructs.
It will lead straight toward hell, Mark, bypassing the major concept that you refuse to delve into-----repentance and forgiveness.
Uh-oh. I just ate lunch, meat involved. No fasting for your soul today. I'm sure you're happy.
No - I tend to stick with 24 hour fasts. I did go vegetarian for a year to see how it felt. Over-rated was my opinion. Especially in the USA where the vegetables are mostly mass produced garbage.
Like the pasty hothouse-grown tomatoes one gets from the grocery store out-of-season and sometimes in-season?
I love a vegetable garden. Do you ever have one? Last year we were over-run with fresh, yummy zucchini and tomatoes and cukes.
And no I'm not interested in debating whether tomatoes are fruits or veggies!
That's quite a diversion from what I was writing, incest and all.
I don't think my point is that erroneous that it's wasted. I'll just leave it where it is.
Conjecture and unsubstantiated B.S. - religion itself is a lie. A hoax and if a single one of the followers actually lived within the guidelines set forth in the so-called scriptures documents, then you'd realize that it's god concept is not real.
But, then again, religion - Christianity, Muslim, and all the rest are based on the same pathetic concept.
Ummm no. Read a couple of my geological hubs and you will realise that God had damn all to do with the creation of the planet; that the planet existed for millions of years before man came along, and will to continue to exist for millions of years after we are as extinct as the dinosaur.
I am of the understanding that marriage is not a requirement to make a family a family. Plain and simple. If you're unable to grasp that concept, it can only be because of your religious view.
However, marriage is and has been, from the beginning of it's inception, a religious based word. Up to the point where governments began offering benefits and entitlements, so as to encourage marriages.
Once marriage, the concept, was used by governments, it no longer became just a symbol for religion. It now exists in a duality of sorts. It has two different, and distinct messages.
And, to make a family a family, is to have people who understand the word and have them pass it on to their children. Religion is not a requirement for living life.
Marriage is soon to become the thing of the past, when governments who supported it in the past and financially see the destructive path is on and has caused, our younger generations of the future will not marry, but simply live together and still have children. At the rate of divorces now a days and apparently it's very high, what's the point in HOLY matrimony any more, it;s a mockery of religion. hah I agree with Cags on this one,.
The lawyers of the world are making a mockery of marriage, the courts are over run with divorce actions at the expense and misery of the parties getting divorced and the fat lawyers and judges are churning these accounts and fattening their bank accounts. It's a sad state of affairs Marriage/Divorce
And I'm saying that the institution of marriage is the foundation of a family, much in the same way, a man can impregnate a woman and go off to start another family with som other woman, never taking thought to care for his first obligation. Does the fact that he donated sperm to the child make him a true father? Not in the least!
I say that if there were no marriage, and no fidelity, then the core of the human socioty will be shattered, and if a sparrow cannot fall to the Earth without the creator having knowledge of that event, then without his guidance we will be no more sucessful in building a structured socioty than the builders of Babel.
Now I've had trouble following this thread, because the original video has been removed? Or so it said when I clicked on the link.
But I fail to see where modern relationships include the words "Free love" like some throwback from the sixties.
There is a huge amount of single parenthood, which perhaps stems from women (or girls) being sensible enough not to marry for the sake of the child, but to wait until the right man came along, which obviously wasn't the child's father, else she'd have married him.
Marriage is heavy. For years we were taught that when you fall in love, or when you get pregnant whichever came first), you got married.
But when a marriage falls apart,it's not only emotionally devastating, its financially devastating, because the couple have to spend a small fortune on a lawyer to sort out their joint financial affairs, when if they had never married the situation would have been clearer in law.
AshleyMadison.com.....Enough said. A billion dollar a year company that is based on providing married people a place to have affairs with other married people. Is it wrong?
to tie the two main topics of this forum together...
I prefer eating fudge over having sexual intercourse with other women
Well, I've never engaged in the latter, but I do like fudge.
And....the topic was about cheating and its effects on traditional marriage. Wouldn't you say it has a hugely detrimental effect, Greek One?
In all honestly, I marvel at how people find the time...
By the time I finish work, pick up groceries, drive home, shovel the driveway, play with the kid and eat dinner.. the whole day is shot.
Maybe it's my age, but if a woman asked me to go to bed with her, I would jump at the chance so long as was just to sleep.
I would say that if you are at the point of cheating your marriage is already in serious trouble.. kinda of like blaming the symptoms instead of the disease.
My notion of marriage involves physical and emotional exclusivity... so yeah, cheating would be kinda bad
Wow. Sounds good. Greek One, your reputation just took a quick turn. But I won't tell anyone. haha
But...you did leave out the concept of right and wrong. You said several things that would prevent you from cheating, but may I pin you down with the question of---do you believe cheating is wrong?
If the participants committed to get involved in an exclusive relationship with one another, then yes, cheating is wrong.
If the participants agreed to have an 'open' marriage, then it isn't really 'cheating'.
Whether or not an 'open' marriage is right or wrong is another question. For myself personally, the concept of 'open marriage' is an oxymoron, since my own personal conception of marriage involves exclusivity.
Otherwise, it's just dating with shared laundry duty
My motto has been and will remain:
Harm neither myself nor anyone else.
I admit to having fallen short on it. But I'm trying to be a better person every day. When you put yourself in other's shoes, suddenly it's not so easy to be so selfish to only think of yourself. That's what marriage and family is about to me. Whether or not it's formalized on paper is irrelevant to me, perhaps not to many others. But in the end, we're really not so divided on this, considering we have similar or like goals. For me the rest is about judgment, and that's really none of my business.
Then you are truly a married with children, and real life is what it is. I understand that. Now I'm watching my kids raise their kids. I worry for them. But at least I smile and laugh a lot with them. They are the best things that ever happened in my life. Truly. The VERY best.
Never. Wait till you have grandkids. It gets even more intense because you're watching your kids experiment in raising your grandkids. And then when there's a tragedy or setback, you get to lose sleep without being able to do much at all but pace the floor at night and pray.
And I do pray, regardless of what others may think. I just don't know what/who's out there or if they're listening, but it still calms me. Some of it is just being grateful that they are in my life.
so you're saying that I should keep drinking, but increase the amount and frequency?
Since when did marriage become monopolized by religion? Or did I miss something?
As for the OP - have to say cheating ain't cricket. However - I also have to say it's a symptom, rather than a cause. And while I'm sayin' - don't see what a traditional marriage has to do with anything.
Cheating's a kicker, married (traditionally or not)or partnered up (married or not) - plus the gender of the two partners is also irrelevant.
@ Mark - so you went veggie? See anything? Cos my sisters veggie-mate never has. And she pretty much lives on what most others call fast food fayre. And I'm not talking about a Mac Dee either
@ Daniel - yup. But despite being labeled a liberal, seems you weren't liberal enough with where you're post could lead. Or maybe I'm thinking literal ...
@ Greek - that's fudge that's gotta be so damn good your eyes water and your body quivers. Which is a lot like ...
I bought a $250 bottle of Johnny Walker Blue the other day, and plan to open it on my son's 21st birthday....
but somehow I think over the years, sips will be taken
Yes - I think you are right. The Port my Dad bought for my wedding day was all gone by the time it happened.
He has very bad gout.
Serves him right.
by jko1120 10 years ago
This is maybe a little different than your ususal cheating spouse situation. My wife had an relationship with a man about a year ago. At the time we were separated due to job transition. We were really separated, she was in Texas and I was in Minnesota. She has since moved...
by dashingscorpio 14 months ago
Is sexual incompatibility a valid reason for ending a marriage?Assuming everything else in the marriage is going fine and the kids are happy.I’m incline to believe most people would opt to cheat rather than go through the divorce process if there has been no change after communicating their needs...
by ngureco 12 months ago
I want to teach my cheating husband a lesson by leaving him for 4 weeks but I am afraid?I am afraid another lady my jump in to fill the vacuum so created by my absence. What do you think?
by melicious 8 years ago
does my husband really love me or is he cheating with someone else?he treats me like dirt now, he gets mad very easily, he often goes to his nieces house and the niece is always trying to introduce him to her little easy friends to try and break up our marriage. hes taken off over night before...
by Kathleen Cochran 5 years ago
Do you think more of a wife who leaves a cheating husband or one who stays with him?Started to do a hub on past sex scandals in Washington. Where are they now kind of thing. Too depressing. But it made me wonder: Do you think more of a wife who leaves a cheating husband or one who stays?
by theluvrbelow 8 years ago
Hello, here's my story I hope someone can relate and share with me some of your insights.I met my ex over the phone, we talked for six months every night, then I visited her and we made love that night.I met her family and we all hit it off splendidly.I fell in love with her madly so.So I relocated...
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