Do you think the cheating person is being honest with anyone involved?
How can a cheater be honest?
Of course not, it's a game to them, whether it may be to stoke their ego or feel important. So by all means who ever else involved is going to get whatever they make them believe or tell them......Go figure!
No, because he, or she had to be lying to everyone involved...About WHO, WHAT, WHEN AND WHERE!
The cheater may be honest to someone if he/she may become guilty at some point or if they get caught. The thing is, with their ability to have sneaked behind someone's back lowers their credibility. So it would be difficult to believe if they had told you everything you wanted to know.
Check me Out!
Unfortunately, the reason that most cheaters are able to get away with it for so long is because they are able to be honest with the lover in many cases.
This can go on for sometime until the lover gets strong enough feelings in which they start to demand more. Then the cheater is forced to lie to them as well. But while it remains strictly physical, the cheater usually tells the lover the truth. By telling the lover the truth, the cheater sets the boundries so that the lover knows not to cross it.
Now ofcourse, the cheater tells their partner all sorts of lies to cover their tracks.
Either way, the entire situation is a disaster waiting to happen!
I have to completely with this statement. The reason why they go on so long is due to the honesty with the lover and not with the partner. The reason why normally the lover, tries to get the person to leave the spouse
Like always, it ends pretty epically, and not in a good way.
I'm a cheater, and my partner knows full well that I am doing it. He also cheats, but in his case it is usually with the same person, and usually in the house while I am sleeping! it's irritating to get up to go to the bathroom to see them going at it in the kitchen. But, with them it happens so often, I have decided to care less.
I think there are various levels of cheating, and in our relationship it has always been a don't ask don't tell thing. But, it sure is really annoying to have them doing it when I am right there. I would never bring another person into our home for sex. I never have, and never will. But, boy, I sure want to! But, not while he is home...he never leaves the house!
So, for anyone reading this who is wondering if their partner is cheating, talk to them about it. But, talk to then in a non accusing way. I call it the "what if" talk. This is of course for people who are not already married.
If you are married, you should seek advice from someone else, like a therapist. That way you are not the accuser. Doing it yourself always make you look like the bad guy.
But, I think people are less uptight about cheating these days, and are more likely to want to talk about it, then just ignore it all together like people did a few decades ago.
My partner and I have been together for over 20 years. I don't think there isn't anything that we don't already know about each other. yes, it's very boring! We are like an old bitter married couple now.
In reply to dosborne08 and mypleasurefantasy. I understand what you mean about being honest with the lover but not the spouse. However, it's not 100% honesty. They may say they are involved with another person or married--which makes some people feel "special" because of this openness, but rarely do the cheater paint the full picture which is true honesty. They skew it to look like the victim. Cheaters lie to themselves and are not honesty about what they are doing and their selfishness. My philosophy are lies/honesty...a person lies to themselves before they utter it to another. The same goes for honesty--it starts with self.
Most cheaters are manipulators, so they aren't fully honest with anyone. Even if the other party knows that the cheater is cheating on someone, it's unlikely that they know the full details of how manipulative the person is. Usually the person doing the cheating tells lies about why they do it, how they feel about the person they're cheating on, etc... In fact, most cheaters even lie to themselves.
Yes,the cheaters being honest with themself.
Making sure their getting what they want. It is,what it is.....
I was once told by a friend,there is no future with a married man.If he'll cheat on his wife,he'll cheat on you.
Don't play the fool,deal with the real!
I am just going through a seperation from a serial offender. At the moment I think he has about 3 or 4 on the go. He spends most of his time emailing and smsing and I can tell you. HE LIES TO EVERYONE - me, his family, the other women, and HIMSELF. it's all about ego. Someone just has to wink at him and he's a gonner.
SO YES THEY LIE, they are deceiptful, cunning and manipulative.
I had to get out, not so easy to do when you're in your 50's. Picking yourself up and dusting yourself off is no joy ride. I have cried, yelled, driven my daughters and friends mad but hopefully coming out the other side soon.
Often times the "other man/other woman" is aware they are seeing someone who is married or attached. This is especially true when the affair happens in the work place or between good friends.
By it's very nature though cheating is lying.
If everything were out in the open it wouldn't be called cheating.
For example couples who have open marriages or participate in swapping would not consider having sex with others cheating because they have discussed it.
Cheating is practicing deception,lying directly or by omission knowing full well your mate would feel betrayed if they knew the truth.
Cheating is part of a person's individuality. It is something of his/her ethics, honesty, integrity, etc. Also, it may be reciprocal. If one partner is a cheat, naturally the other partner also may tend to be one.
Highly doubt it. If the person he's cheating with knows he has a significant other, why are they allowing themselves to fall into a painful trap? Kind of... counter-productive, if I do say so myself. T_T;
(Then again, my first and only love to day had a girlfriend, so I probably don't count. I'm glad he was loyal to her even if I loved him too.)
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