How do men really feel about having friends with benefits?

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   katiem2posted 14 years ago

   Much is said about relationships and really GUYS how do you feel about being friends with benefits?
   
   More and more we women are happy with our lives not being married and like to enjoy the physical benefits and pleasure of a man without getting serious.
   
   Does having a "F" buddy work for men?

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      prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      F buddy like a friend buddy, he helps you with finances? I am not a man, I answered, LOL..

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         katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Hey pretty dark horse, I'm talking about a relationship based on purely sex between friends who are not married yet single.  Great to see you!

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            prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            It will be some kind of special bond then, does this mean you are exclusive?
            
            Nice to see you katiem2..you take care

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               Cagsilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Actually, it only takes attraction and the partners(sexual pair) are not exclusive to each other.

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                  katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Thats what I tend to think as well, other wise it tends to get into the relationship area...

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                  prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Ok I understand now, Thanks to you both Cags and katiem!

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               katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

               It depends, you take the responsibility of safe practices and some are exclusive while some may not be.  It's a matter of choice.  It's becoming more and more common.  Happy to see you to dear take good care of yourself as well.

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      John Holdenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Had a friend for about 15-20 years, when we were both without partners (and occasionally when with) we used to sleep together.
      It worked perfectly well for both of us.

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         katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks for the feedback

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      dutchman1951posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      it depends on your attitudes. if you both are mature enough and confident appart as well as togeather, it works. But if it gets all emotional (Mind games) and the view gets clouded, it can be problematic.
      
      Takes sincer honesty, character and strength of both parties I personaly think. As well as an attraction of course!

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         katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         I agree honestly and a good sense of self and reality. 

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   Cagsilposted 14 years ago

   Hey Katie,
   
   I've had 3 relationships in that manner. It was appropriate for them and myself.
   
   Is it immoral? Maybe to some religious zealot, but sex is sex. And, there is nothing immoral about sex.

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you Cagsil!    Hey look at your cool new avatar, I like

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         Cagsilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         And, how close to me do you live?

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            katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            lol., I'm in Ohio, central ohio so how far is that?

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               Cagsilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Well, it's not within walking distance if that's what you wanted to know.
               
               You're central U.S. and I'm on the East coast. I guess that leaves what- 1800 miles. HA!
               
               Always a pleasure Katie. Nice to see you.

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                  katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  That's a long walk...
                  
                  Always good to see you as well...

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   kimberlyslyricsposted 14 years ago

   I say friends with benefits have been some of the coolest in my life.  Now I'm just old katiem *sigh*
   

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      lol your never too old!

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      Stimpposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      This pic just screams "Hey, I have an STD...pick me, please". 

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   Greek Oneposted 14 years ago

   it gets too complicated and awkward...
   
   especially if the details come out in court

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   brimancandyposted 14 years ago

   In my situation, I find that a lot of men don't want the whole friends with benefits thing. To them it is all or nothing. I would suspect in the hetro world, there is probably a thin line when it comes to someone being a f-buddy.
   
   Most men are ok with sleeping with you once or twice to see how it goes, and, that person would more than likely end up being considered just a fling. And, more than likely, they weill either avoid you all together, or give you the lets just be friends speach  and never have sex with you again, but, will say hello or hang out with you at your request, but, will not be the one to ask.
   
   I have tried the benefits thing, but, then I started truly falling for him, and I wanted to see him more and more. But, He made it clear to me that I was just a f-buddy, and it would never be any more than that, and once it wasn't a mutual thing, our buddy status ended, and I got the lets be friends speach.
   
   I really don't think the minds of straight men and gay men are that different. We all enjoy sex about the same, and our views about who we are going to love, how, and why, are only different by whom we are having sex with.
   
   But, I do think that gay men would admit to having f-buddies more than a straight man would. As, I think a straight man would do more damage to his reputation with Women, if he admitted to having friends that are also sex partners.
   
   I think the question you should ask yourself, is how would you feel about dating a man, if you knew he had several female f-buddies? As some gay men have a lot of F-buddies! It's true.

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Very good point and as I straight chic I relate as well

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   tritrainposted 14 years ago

   Nah, I'm not interested.
   
   I think for some men and women it would work for them.

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Good to hear from you! 

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   Stacie Lposted 14 years ago

   I have always thought that "friends with benefits" thing was a  farce.
   I see no benefit for either "friend."
   a real friend would not use another for sex..they are fooling themselves thinking it's just physical.. JMHO

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Stacie, Thank You for your humble opinion.  I don't think it's ever a good idea to use someone for any reason, good point!

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         Diane Insideposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Hi, I think it's possible as I have know some who do that, but then what happens in the future, when you do want to stay with just one man, that you fall for.
         
         If he knows that a women has been doing this, will he be more inclined to stay with her knowing that she has so easily been able to participate in this kinda of promiscuity. I would think he would wonder if she would begin to think of him in the same manner.
         
         I don't know it's just a thought.

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            katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Interesting thought! 

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   wyanjenposted 14 years ago

   Yep, me and my buddy are totally using each other for sex.
   
   
   Ugly divorces
   Conflicts with child custody
   Hours spent in courts
   Thousands spent on lawyers...
   We're both burned out and used up from our former marriages.
   
   It's too late to start over again. But, why should we have to be lonely?
   
   
   We are 100% honest and monogamous. And we have a great time together.

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Now that's WHAT I'm talking about! 

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   Jewelsposted 14 years ago

   As the question is geared toward the man answering, I guess I can only assume what my F Buddy thinks.  He's not complained, gets lots of benefits, has no responsibilities around the house and keeps coming back!

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      katiem2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      You go Jewels, Great example!

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10. 0

    Stevennix2001posted 14 years ago

    its okay if all your looking for is sex, and your not into any kind of serious relationship.  for me though, i wouldn't want any part of it.  sure, it would be a lot of fun at first but if your looking for something serious, then no it's not a good idea at all.  Im not into that sort of thing, as friends with benefits sounds too complicated and not worth the risk if you ask me.  besides, i don't like sharing girls that i like with anybody; especially other men, as that would just straight up piss me off.  lol.  just saying.  lol.

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