I know a lot of people do visit graves. My parents are buried in California and I do not visit their graves. What made them the people I loved is not there anymore so I really do not see the purpose. I know some people will visit graves and "talk" to their loved ones. That doesn't work for me.
In terms of Feng Shui where the dead is buried in a right location where the current and future generation will benefit prosperity and health with protection.
With land scare in Singapore, it will not be possible to choose your own plot of land for burial. Visiting the dead to pray for wealth and health's protection. that is if you still believe in spirits.
Nowadays, we are now making decision of cremation which will be neutral in terms of Feng Shui. Therefore it will not affect the fate of the next generation. Go to columbarium for prayers where the ashes are being kept will not have any effect on Feng Shui. But it is just a matter of showing respect for the dead and what they had done for you during their living days.
We visit the graves of the dead to pay respect to their memory. Just like visiting ground zero to pay respect to the ideals of what America stands for, we pay respect to our loved ones for what they stood for in life and for what their memory means to us. Some say that the first sign of human civilization was the burying of the dead which showed empathy. Visiting the dead therefore is a part of human nature.
I think people have very personal reasons for visiting grave sites, but mostly I think it is to help them grieve and come to terms with the loss they have experienced. We also visit grave sites to show respect for those whose graves we visit.
I know that after my boyfriend died suddenly in a car accident I visited his grave site on a regular basis, even taking along a single red rose and leaving it on his grave. Once at his grave site, the visit seemed futile, but I still left the rose. I never stayed long. After a while, I didn't go anymore. I knew he wasn't there and there was no connection to be made again with him in this life, but something I cannot explain well compelled me to keep visiting the grave site for a while. The best I can explain is that it was my own way of coming to terms with his absence and the reality of his death.
we can't deny the fact that sometimes we miss them too. Also this shows respect to our relatives that is dead we still care for them and they always remain in our hearts forever and ever.
Often we still want that attachment of our loved one. Letting go is hard for many and visiting a gravesite can sometimes be for selfish reasons. However, as much as we rejoice in birth we mourn and rejoice in death. Mourn for the loss and in some faiths, rejoice for the soul meeting his maker. Visiting a grave is a respectful way of paying homage, or having one last conversation, or finally saying the words, "I am sorry". For some, it brings closure, for others, it leaves a line of communication open to the spirit world. Mostly, I believe we visit graves to soothe our own pain and to gather strength to move on.
The long honored tradition of grave stones, markers and statuaries speaks to the universal need for a visual reminder that our loved ones existed and will not be forgotten. It marks a small place where their remains lay, signifying a time when they lived, laughed and loved on the earth.
The diversity in humanity places varying degrees of importance and relevance for visiting the dead. Some feel a strong need for the closure that a visual reminder brings, some feel closeness and connection by visiting their deceased loved one. Some are reminded of their own mortality and avoid visiting a final resting place. Some find the concept morbid and approach death in a more clinical way, with a sense that a grave only holds the remaining dust of the person and visiting only heightens their loss in missing the spirit of their loved one. The long held reverence for honoring the dead with a wake, service and burial symbolizes the importance of the person and their journey. It will always be a part of life.
The constant evolution of human beings, changing ideas, personal experiences and paths, can encompass our feelings, over time, regarding visiting the dead. Having a marked site that holds our loved ones, whether we choose to visit or not, recognizes that they lived, made a difference and mattered to someone in this big world.
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