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Why does my Cock seem so ruffled in the mornings

  1. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    My male chicken (cock) always seems very ruffled in the mornings his feathers are all over the place...have I put him in with too many hens....there are six hens in with him....

    1. Arthur Fontes profile image90
      Arthur Fontesposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Is he being henpecked?

    2. manlypoetryman profile image75
      manlypoetrymanposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I'm sure he can do something about this...Sounds like he just isn't putting his head into it !

    3. prettydarkhorse profile image63
      prettydarkhorseposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      oh good luck to the six chickens hehehe

    4. yoshi97 profile image87
      yoshi97posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I checked with your 'vet'. He said you were feeding your prized pet too much Viagra and you need to stop before blindness sets in. smile

    5. falcon64 profile image60
      falcon64posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Hahaha....Don't used men chicken(cock). Used Rooster and please give him a breed.smile

    6. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Now how many Cocks ever get to lay with so many chicks at once?

    7. profile image0
      LEWJposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      All that extra company is bound to ruffle a cock--- mornin',  noon OR night!    Sometimes cock supplements can calm a cock down---even big fat, thick cocks.      The bigger they are, the more supplement it takes to calm those big fat cocks.  You might even notice that your cock will get hard after being exposed to all that company.   Sometimes the biggest, hardest cocks require several pounds of supplement, while the little cocks only need a few calm-down pills. Now some of these supplements might cause a little stiffness in the cock at first, but regular application of these aids will in time eliminate that initial reaction in a healthy cock.

      I can recommend these aids because I once had a cock named Dick who had the same problem yours still has.

      May I suggest COCK DE-RUFFLER pills, or THIK COCK softeners; the softeners really do a job on a ruffled cock.    They wilt it right down to the barn floor!   No more loose feathers after this!  Your ruffled cock will be not only placcid but positively FLACCID for at least 34 hours.  Another good supplement, called 890 COCK OIL and sold by The Duke Of Oils Inc.,  is used worldwide for soothing excited cocks.  If your cock gets out of hand again, just pour a handful of this wondrous oil over it for fine and quick results my friend.

      If by any chance those don't work, you can try SUPERCOCK DOWN tablets---these have a 30-day money back guarantee, and boy oh boy, do they calm down a rowdy cock!   All the hens in the neighborhood won't be able to excite your cock after a dose of THIS formula.   One dose lasts for a full 90 days, no matter what happens to your cock or how much company it gets.  If you do choose to use it, your ruffled cock problems will disappear at once.

      On the other hand (or IN the other hand), if you want to get your cock up and running in the morning, there's an excellent new supplement called  PUSSYWILLOW CREAM that's got a long list of amino acids in it--perfect for unresponsive cocks.  It is said that an improvement on this formula is called PUSSYWILLOWS PLUS.   That stuff's supposed to have been laboratory tested, and to have raised a dead cock up to a full stand in 3.7 minutes with all feathers intact!    This is supposed to have happened in front of an audience of American scientists last year, but I can't vouch for it.   Anyway, if it can resurrect dead cocks, I'd give it a try....

    8. spiderspun profile image60
      spiderspunposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      He is just shaking off a good night with the chicks and ruffling his feathers to look good incase there are any new chickens to the hen yard. He also wants to look bigger to chace off any other cocks that might go after his hens

  2. Shadesbreath profile image90
    Shadesbreathposted 7 years ago

    HHAHAHAHA that's so funny.  It reminds me of when my children were in 4th grade.  Thanks for that.

  3. Daniel Carter profile image90
    Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago

    Perhaps the job is a bit too big for him and the hens are getting the best of him.

  4. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    This is a very serious topic and not to be taken lightly.....what if he dies through the night...what will I wake up to...

    1. Wayne Orvisburg profile image78
      Wayne Orvisburgposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      A stiff cock?

      1. Daniel Carter profile image90
        Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        A stiff cock that doesn't go away needs to be treated medically, they say. However, if it's stiff permanently, I think the only solution is to remove it.

        1. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
          Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Medical Attention??? Are you joking, every time I see a viagra commercial that says see your doctor if you have an erection lasting longer than 4 hours I think to myself if I had a 4 hour erection I am not wasting it on my doctor.

          1. Daniel Carter profile image90
            Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Not that I agree with doctors anyway, just quoting recommended protocol. smile

            A stiff chicken is a hard thing to hide. Best to steer clear of glass houses, etc.
            As for choking, I don't recommend the standard ringing of the neck. Far too brutal. There are more creative ways to handle such a problem.

  5. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Daniel hen pecked I think they call it...maybe its all too much for him...

  6. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Wayne thanks for that, I am doing all I can to avoid it but It looks like its going to happen some morning....

  7. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Arthur I just dont know, when I look at him in the morning he looks wrecked.....

  8. Wayne Orvisburg profile image78
    Wayne Orvisburgposted 7 years ago

    If it is henpecking, you need to find out which one is responsible, then choke that chicken! Oh god, I can't stop.

    1. J. Kumm profile image59
      J. Kummposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Oh you are all too funny. Thanks for the laugh today Hubbers. smile

  9. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Are you suggesting a hands on approach Wayne....I just dont know if I could pull it

  10. Wayne Orvisburg profile image78
    Wayne Orvisburgposted 7 years ago

    Just remember, when you have to choke the chicken, it's best to start out slowly. You can't just rush in and start choking away.

  11. blondepoet profile image80
    blondepoetposted 7 years ago

    To be it sounds like the poor cock has been up all night.

  12. Arthur Fontes profile image90
    Arthur Fontesposted 7 years ago

    I do not know what is happening but something is fowl.

  13. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    blondepoet, it does seem that way, I just dont know, I think I will have to take matters in hand....

  14. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    it certainly is Arthur...

  15. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    daniel I hear what you are saying, but I just dont know if I could be that cruel....

  16. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
    Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago

    LMAO,  How can we really take this thread seriously  there is just too much fun to be had with this one

    1. profile image0
      tequilarosemama4posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      your right. if i was a guy and had that problem i would look for the nearest strip joint or something.

      but on the serious side i don't know much about chickens but if it seems to be creating a problem for the cock then put him in a sperate pen. but best of luck resolving this

  17. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    has_awaywithwords certainly not surely its a vet that needs to see a Cock that is in difficulty....

  18. blondepoet profile image80
    blondepoetposted 7 years ago

    I have been searching earnestly for a solution to this medical problem across the many pages of the net. I hate to break this to you but I am now quite adamant it is a condition they call "Cockarigmaritis", thus meaning your cock has no balls. I personally would be interigating the chickens, and confirming what eggs they are actually sitting on.

  19. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    I don't know what is wrong with your cock, but I have a pussy that is awfully depressed every morning - maybe its just the cold winter weather and the lack of sunshine!

    1. blondepoet profile image80
      blondepoetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Hahahahaha

  20. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
    Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago

    maybe your pussy got wet then began to freeze with the cold weather.

    1. mega1 profile image79
      mega1posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      no, I'm quite sure she hasn't even been outside - but the nights are awfully long this time of year - if she doesn't perk up this spring, I'll have to take her to that cute vet!

      1. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
        Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        LOL  well if you go see that vet you better be prepared in case he has one of those cocks that is ruffled, the pussy might get beat up by the ruffled cock....LMAO   this is getting so bad.

  21. profile image0
    Justine76posted 7 years ago

    ok....  lol  that question is hilarious, but just in case your truly concerned for your cock...
    'henpecked' has nothing to do with the male...  hens peck each other to be lead hen. if you have less then 4 hens....your cock will get bored and you will have a really upset and bald lead hen. hes ruffled for one of 2 reasons, either hes chilly, or..well...how do YOU  wake up?....they ruffle up to show off   smile

  22. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    well, I'll have to keep you posted!

  23. Ron Montgomery profile image59
    Ron Montgomeryposted 7 years ago

    Maybe he's upset about the frozen tits?

  24. AnythingArtzy profile image83
    AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago

    Oh, I see you were talking about a rooster.......  smile smile smile smile

    1. blondepoet profile image80
      blondepoetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Oh shame on you what were you thinking ROFL smile

  25. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    yes, a rooster and a cat! lol

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I couldn't help myself I had to go there. so what kind of posts do ya think would be here if, you know, it wasn't really about a rooster.

      Too  funny Id imagine lol lol lol

      I've already laughed so hard at the present posts lol lol

  26. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    Seriously, I was thinking that maybe some critter had been after your cock at night, trying to get hold of him!  and maybe he's having to fight for his life all night long!  But even that sounds risque!

  27. Isabelle22 profile image61
    Isabelle22posted 7 years ago

    Hahaha this thread is hilarious. It nearly made me choke on my cornflakes.

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I agree, I have never laughed so hard or enjoyed a thread as much as this.

      1. Isabelle22 profile image61
        Isabelle22posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        God what a dry world it would be without them lol

  28. waynet profile image50
    waynetposted 7 years ago

    Ruffled cock....how very dare you!!! oh as in hens, chickens and all that jazz, pleased to meet you cock, not been doing anything with them chickens have you you shouldn't have?

  29. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    I think the only solution might be to sit up all night with your cock and see what's going on!

    1. waynet profile image50
      waynetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I tried that and 2 to 3 minutes later I smoked a cigarette and fell to sleep, I was tired!

      1. mega1 profile image79
        mega1posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        So you found out what was going on, then?

        1. waynet profile image50
          waynetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Yep, did  the five knuckle shuffle with my cock a doodle doo, had a cig and fell asleep

        2. mega1 profile image79
          mega1posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Because I figure you'll have to keep doing that, until you can figure out what to do about it!  Or scare the critter away, maybe!

  30. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    I just can't seem to leave it alone~!  Can't keep my mouth closed!

  31. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
    Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago

    I have never really been one to find a stiff cock appealing but for some reason I keep coming back here...lol

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      though I DO find them appealing I still can't get away from this thread either. Oh we need more like them. I love to get ornery and enjoy harmless fun like this.

  32. profile image0
    lyricsingrayposted 7 years ago

    someone said cock.

    1. profile image0
      lyricsingrayposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      again.

      1. profile image0
        Justine76posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        porn?....oh, wrong thread....

    2. Isabelle22 profile image61
      Isabelle22posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I'm sure I heard the word cock somewhere.

      1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
        AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        has a nice ring to it doesn't it  lol lol

  33. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    They're really kinda pretty when they're all ruffled up like that, don't ya think?

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      LMBO LOL LOL LOL

  34. AnythingArtzy profile image83
    AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago

    have you tried singing to it? LOL

  35. Paradise7 profile image86
    Paradise7posted 7 years ago

    man the ruffled cock grabbed EVERYONE!  Whoa boy!!!

  36. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    yep, don't worry about us - nobody here but us chickens!

  37. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
    Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago

    how did you know my cock had a ring on it?

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      really now care to show and tell? lol lol lol

    2. blondepoet profile image80
      blondepoetposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      No wonder the poor thing was up all night

  38. mega1 profile image79
    mega1posted 7 years ago

    and they wonder why we get addicted to the Hub Forums!  lol

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      God help me I can't leave this thread. lol lol lol  It's way to much fun. lol lol

  39. Has_aWayWithWords profile image79
    Has_aWayWithWordsposted 7 years ago

    lol I can't show pictures, the internet police may come arrest me for animal cruelty

    1. AnythingArtzy profile image83
      AnythingArtzyposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      darn, you were talking about your pet??. I'm sooooooooo  disappointed  wink wink lol lol lol

  40. Paradise7 profile image86
    Paradise7posted 7 years ago

    Six hens, one rooster, no wonder the poor sod is ruffled...

  41. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    It is 8.30am here in Ireland, I have just had a good look at my Cock and the news is not good, as I held him in my hand he appeared limp but not lifeless, I stroked his neck and he appeared to react, I have left him with the hens now and I will have another look at him later...

  42. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Do I have to wait for New York to wake up to get help with my Cock...it is 11.30am here in Ireland...

  43. Niteriter profile image79
    Niteriterposted 7 years ago

    Have you tried calling him by name? You did give him a name, didn't you?

  44. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    I did initially call him Biffo which is the nick name of our Prime Minister in Ireland....but he simply sat around and done nothing.....should I call him Tiger

  45. Niteriter profile image79
    Niteriterposted 7 years ago

    I have a critter in my coop who behaves a lot like Biffo. I tried beating him but that didn't work. I guess I won't be of much help to you.

  46. profile image0
    Audreveaposted 7 years ago

    Oh dear. It's not supposed to be ruffled at all.

  47. thirdmillenium profile image60
    thirdmilleniumposted 7 years ago

    For a moment there I pictured another kind of the description being ruffled. Thank goodness it is not that!

  48. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Thanks anyway Niter, I would not like to beat him, I just like holding him and stroking him......

  49. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    Audrevea, I know, what should I do, stroking him seems to work sometimes but other times he seems lifeless and limp....

    1. soni2006 profile image48
      soni2006posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Ur cock needs a Swedish massage. Ask your hens if they can give some or you have hire a cock massage expert anyway. Massage relieves all types of stiffness and lifelessness of all cocks making your cock smooth, soft and ready for next breed. Also shave it a bit, even the hens love it. Isn't it hens?

      1. Hmrjmr1 profile image79
        Hmrjmr1posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Thats a razor blade to far...Can't afford to nic a good ol faithful cock now can we?? cool

  50. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    thirdmillenium, I dont know what people are thinking sometimes, here is me, Cock in hand, lifeless and limp and people find that funny or amusing....am I missing something..

 
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