Can you be friends with your ex if they found another partner?

1. 72

   soconfidentposted 10 years ago

   Can you be friends with your ex if they found another partner?

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2. 0

   JThomp42posted 10 years ago

   If they cheated, no way. It would just be to uncomfortable for one side or the other.

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3. 91

   Dr Billy Kiddposted 10 years ago

   That's an easy one. If you are friends before you break up with your lover or spouse, you can be friends afterwards. But if you are not friends before you break up, there is no reason you would suddenly be friends afterwards. If fact, lots of people fall into crazy love and never take the time to become friends before moving on when crazy, obsessive love ends (generally by 18 months into the relationship). And it's part of the reason they break up.

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4. 82

   dashingscorpioposted 10 years ago

   I think it all depends on the people involved and how the exes broke up. Generally speaking even if the exes really are "platonic friends" as in now behave like (siblings) there are lots of people who might date them and not feel comfortable with the nature of their friendship.
   Given the choice between moving forward with your "new love" and potential spouse or keeping your ex/platonic friend most people will wave good-bye to the ex. If your ex is "in love" and his or her mate tells them to make a "choice" it won't be a difficult decision.

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      calmclinicposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I agree, it's a case to case basis.

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5. 74

   Li Galoposted 10 years ago

   It depends on the maturity level and mutual respect of the people involved.  When I refer to the people, I mean both the ex's and the new partners. So, it is possible.  I've done it and it's a red flag if the new person I'm with lacks the maturity to be able to handle my ex as a friend in my life because, at my age, I just don't want to deal with that level of insecurity and/or jealousy in a romantic partner.  When that starts to happen, it's like "Next!" 
   
   However, I think if an ex cheated, that definitely muddies the waters and can just erase that possibility for most people.  Even so, I know a lady who was married to one guy, cheated on the guy with the guy's brother, and yet, despite the lady and guy getting divorced, all three remain friends.  At first, I thought this must be for the benefit of the kids but the kids are all grown up and have moved out.  Yet, the three still spend time together socially as friends and she is even remarried.  The new husband is okay with all of it and hangs out with all of them, too.  So, if everyone wants it, it's possible.

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6. 45

   DDEposted 10 years ago

   Exs talking  to each other after finding new partners  can make things feel different also it depends on the reasons for departing, Exs can be friends if kids are involved for the kids sake.

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7. 60

   Acmonteroposted 10 years ago

   I have always believed in a Spanish saying that my grandmother always said
   "Donde fuego hubo, cenizas quedan" Meaning where ever fire burned, ashes remain. If you truly loved someone that you were in a relationship with, then being friends with them and them having a significant other is not easy. No matter what I am a firm believer that those old feelings will resurface because you loved them and good memories remain even though bad memories might be what caused you to no longer be together. The feelings will always be there and there is always a special place in your heart and in in theirs for each other love.

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8. 81

   Jade89posted 10 years ago

   You could, I suppose (if you're feelings for him or her weren't that strong to begin with so you won't be jealous of their new partner. etc) but I don't know if their new partner would like that much. I know I wouldn't.

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