How can I learn to say no to solicitors?

Jump to Last Post 1-7 of 7 discussions (8 posts)
  1. Shanna11 profile image91
    Shanna11posted 6 years ago

    How can I learn to say no to solicitors?

    I'm out 90 bucks in just two days because of solicitors. It's my fault for not saying no, but I need to LEARN how to say no to these guys. They come with all these legit charities that need money and I feel so pressured and obligated to say yes. I feel like a terrible, selfish person if I say no. I also feel way rude. But, because of my recent charitable spending spree, I'm eating ramen for the next two weeks. tongue

  2. profile image70
    win-winresourcesposted 6 years ago

    Oh my Shanna-

    Like Paul Simon said in "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" there must be 50 ways to tell a solicitor no.

    1)  No, thank you.  (then hang up or close the door)
    2) Not interested.  (then hang up or close the door)
    3)  Hang up.
    4)  Walk away.

    Repeat  as many times as you are solicited.

    You owe a solicitor no explanations or another minute of your time.
    You can pick your charities as you see fit and can afford. 
    You are simply allowing yourself to be preyed upon.  There is no need to feel that you are being rude or selfish. You have every right to protect yourself (and your budget).

    -DW

  3. mommahottness profile image54
    mommahottnessposted 6 years ago

    Tell them "Don"t let the door hit ya; Where the good Lord Split ya!"   Just kidding!!!!

    You have a rite to say NO. You have a rite to your TIME. You have a rite to your MONEY.
    Dont feel guilty. But also tell them right away so they don't have to waste their time.
    Be Honest tell them NO THANK YOU! and they will  appreciate that!!!

  4. Lizam1 profile image80
    Lizam1posted 6 years ago

    Sounds like you feel "guilty" about saying no.  I have a hub about saying "NO" to your family and others - saying no is a good way to take care of ourselves.  Make a list of one or two causes or  charities you do support or donate to.  Next time you are asked by solicitors you can say NO.  I have chosen to support xxxx this year and say a firm thank you and goodbye,  If they carry on talking say thank you again and ask them not to call again then hang up.

  5. Lipnancy profile image92
    Lipnancyposted 6 years ago

    There is another route that works....  When they ask you if Shanna11 is there, just say I am sorry but Shana11 died two days ago.... They never bother you again.

    The other one that works is "No... she is in jail." These work better than the do not call list.

  6. duffsmom profile image61
    duffsmomposted 6 years ago

    It is hard but you do need to care for yourself first.  I used to have a hard time with it and still do at times depending on my mood. On the phone I tell them "we give all of our contributions through our church," and if they argue, like they do, I am polite but firm and say - no, we really can't help you, and I hang up quietly.

    In person, I would put a sign on my door that says "no soliciting" and do not answer the door if they show up. If you do, simply control the conversation by saying no right away.  If you let them get started talking, you're sunk. So when they show up greet them with a firm, kind, "If you are soliciting for a charity, I cannot help you, I have through our church."  Smile and close the door. Do NOT allow them into your home.

    And remember - you are in the right, you are not a bad person for saying no.

  7. profile image52
    Ren Faizposted 4 years ago

    You need professional help. 

    If the fear of feeling bad about yourself, or guilty, makes you a pushover, an easy mark, a people pleaser,  then you have low self esteem.  You need to get into ongoing psychotherapy and work personal growth issues, with emphasis on your self image and, in that process, learn to stand up for yourself. 

    Are you in a relationship with a controlling, abusive person?  Were you raised in an abusive family? 

    Read the book, "When I Say No I Feel Guilty," or other such books about women's self esteem.

    Get professional psychological help.

    1. Shanna11 profile image91
      Shanna11posted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I hardly think that is necessary. I am not in an abusive relationship and my family was not abusive, either. I simply want everyone to be happy. It makes me happy to make others happy. I hardly think that is unusual.

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)