My daughter made this one up! Groan! (And can you believe, she has a teenage daughter herself!)
Why did the woman use hand sanitizer before driving?
She wanted to have a clean driving record!
Let's hear it: altogether, now, G-R-O-A-N-N-N-N ! ! ! !
@Dzy, Sssssss, Ba Boom! Sound of cymbal and snare drum. Not bad. But seriously, folks. I am so tired. I flew here tonight. Man, are my arms tired.
How could you have a teen age daughter? You're barely out of high school yourself!
My sister had a baby this morning. Haven't found out yet whether boy or girl, so still don't know if I'm an aunt or an uncle.
What's the difference between avian flu and swine flu?
With avian flue, you need tweetment
With swine flue, you need oinkment
Why can't a cat tell a dog a knock-knock joke?
Because when the cat says, "Knock knock!"
The dog goes, "Barkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbark. Woofwoofwoofwooofwoofbarkbark!"
Why can't we see the moon during a solar eclipse?
OH MY GOD!!! IT'S TOO BRIGHT!! MY EYES!! I'M BLIND!!!!
What do you call the happiest girl in the world?
Yuck, Yuck, Yuck
For those who haven't come across this,
Mother: What does IDK means?
Daughter: I Don't Know
Mother: OK, I'll ask your brother.
Saltines, if you please Now let me do some Hip Hop slang:
Saltines if you Pleez!!!! Yo!
Send my thanks to your daughter, this thread brightened my day
Did you know that England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool?
Really enjoyed this thread, too. I miss our old joke telling sessions in person now that everything's on social media.
Did you also hear about a startling Physical Body fact: There is NO crime inside the Human Body because it has Lots of Cells.
Okay; here's another one for you. I made this one up, so my younger daughter has learned from the best--errrr--corniest!
Q. What do waitresses and dentists have in common?
A. They both ask you questions when your mouth is full!
Lol, your daughters joke made me laugh. I like the dentist joke too!
A fellow goes into a coffee shop, orders breakfast and coffee.
Apparently, the shop has been having trouble with customers swiping the sugar packets, so when the guy asks for sugar, the waitress reaches inside her blouse, and hands him a couple of packets.
She then asks him "Cream?"
He says, "You wouldn't dare!!"
by Liz Rayen 7 years ago
What is your favorite "Knock Knock Joke?"We all grew up with them! We all told them to someone, somewhere, sometime in our lifetime. There are so many of them out there! Some repeated, some made up. But no matter where we hear them, they always bring to us a giggle and a smile! What is...
by Liz Elias 15 months ago
At the risk of incurring the wrath of fellow writers, I humbly submit my newest corny joke. No, it isn't a knock-knock joke. (Ducking rotten eggs and tomatoes.)Q. Why are practitioners of meditation electrical? (Now, no cheating; really try to think of the answer before you scroll...
by MomsTreasureChest 6 years ago
What's Your Favorite Knock Knock Joke?I'll start with a Halloween one...Knock Knock ** Who's There? ** Boo ** Boo Who? ** Why ya cryin? It's only a joke! **
by kirstenblog 9 years ago
Why are brides always unlucky?.......Because they never marry the Best Man!
by LonghornComedy 7 years ago
What is the difference between a Comedian and a Joke Teller?There are a lot of so called "Comedians" that are actually Joke Tellers....so you know the difference between them?
by Aiden Roberts 7 years ago
I was browsing Google and spotted this advert for a job, now I think it looks like a joke but maybe it's a real job for someone out there.http://www.google.com/intl/en/jobs/uslo … index.html
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