Should Children who are products of rape know their fathers?

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  1. sparksdaniel2000 profile image71
    sparksdaniel2000posted 15 years ago

    I'm not quite sure---

    1. profile image0
      Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      No they shouldn't, because their fathers should be hanged by the time they are born.

      1. Bredavies profile image62
        Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

        HELL YES!!! smile There's the answer

        1. profile image0
          Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

          lol, and the funny thing is I mean it.

          1. Misha profile image65
            Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            You'll grow up, give it some time smile

            1. profile image0
              Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              I'm 73 years old so Misha, my son, I don't have much time.

              1. Misha profile image65
                Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                You don't sound like this, but who knows of course, some people never grow up. smile

            2. Bredavies profile image62
              Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              Are you saying someone who rapes someone should not be murdered?

              1. Misha profile image65
                Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                Two wrongs never make right. smile

                1. profile image0
                  Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                  Well, if this is your answer, I'd suggest that, please, think about an issue before you form your opinion on it.

                  1. Misha profile image65
                    Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                    When you get to know me better (if ever), you will see that if I have an opinion on something, that means I gave it a fair amount of thought. smile

                2. Bredavies profile image62
                  Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                  I wish to disagree. I am all against an eye for and eye usually. Like if someone kills someone they should be throwin in prison. But rape is worse then death to most women. It leaves you so emotionally broken and scared..maybe for months..or for life.

                  1. profile image0
                    Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                    Bredavies, I agree, to some extent. But I also think that if it happens to a woman than she must be strong and not let it defeat her. It's a thing that happens to some women (and that's why I say rapists should be hanged), but the women are stronger than this.

                    I mean if I were a woman and it happened to me I think the first thing on my mind would be to take revenge. And I would do it. I always say, people can do physical harm to me and then I will do the same thing to them in return. But they can't do psychological harm to me, because then I will kill them.

              2. goodfriendiam profile image60
                goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                Whats the difference between rape and say lying? I'm just curious to know that's all.

                1. Bredavies profile image62
                  Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                  umm..what?

                  Yes lying is terrible. It hurts people emotionally. But the physical and terrible act of being forced is both mentally and physically distructive. I think there is a huge difference there.

                  1. goodfriendiam profile image60
                    goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

                    How? I mean couldn't a lie do just as much damage physically and mentally?

          2. Bredavies profile image62
            Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            Oh I can tell! And you should mean it! Rape is the most disgusting desperate thing!

            1. profile image0
              Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              Desperate for sure, because it has nothing to do with affection, but everything with anger.

      2. video lost profile image58
        video lostposted 15 years agoin reply to this

        Most of the victims agree upon the punishment of severe torchered death penalty for the rapists.

  2. Misha profile image65
    Mishaposted 15 years ago

    Who are you to decide?

  3. Bredavies profile image62
    Bredaviesposted 15 years ago

    yeah...that is for sure a tough one.

  4. maven101 profile image72
    maven101posted 15 years ago

    Getting back on topic, I would say yes, you should seek out the rapist, study his daily habits, gather information, and plan a night of sweet revenge...like emasculation...just some thoughts..

    1. Bredavies profile image62
      Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I also agree with that. smile

    2. profile image0
      Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      A more mature view on the subject. smile

    3. goodfriendiam profile image60
      goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Larry, my goodness I will remember you when I send out my xmas party invitations.....lol, What would you do to  me, if all my dirty little secrets got out.....lol...I'm running from larry, na, na, na, na, na, na.....lol

    4. bella353 profile image59
      bella353posted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I agree

  5. Luciendasky profile image60
    Luciendaskyposted 15 years ago

    Hi. Very interesting threads... on both sides. Does anyone here either closely knows someone who has been raped or a child brought about by rape?

    I know both - in fact, I know several rape victims and they all act different about it. Some of them are not over it yet and are still dealing with damage after 25 years, but they have ALL "forgiven" the rapers and they have said that forgiving them was the first thing they did to come to grips with themselves again and begin the healing process.

    Do I like rapists? Absolutely not. Do I think they should be punished? Absolutely. Do I think the victim of the rape should punish them? No... it would do more damage to the victim in the long run - and I know that from personal experience.

    My friend who is the "product" of a rape does not know her father but wishes she could meet him just so she could know what her family history is like, she doesn't respect him, but she doesn't hate him... for those things I think it should go a on a case by case basis.

    1. Bredavies profile image62
      Bredaviesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Someone very close to me has been raped..Maybe thats why I think think anyone who rapes..Should be cut, beat, whatever is painful.

      1. goodfriendiam profile image60
        goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

        Ya I understand, I was never raped and I don't know anyone that has been raped, but I have been abused really really bad growing up in a sexual way. I guess if we are going to measure it, then I guess you could say it was rape. But you know what I forgave him,and it took a while to forgive, that is and it sure wasn't easy, I wanted to get revenge on him in a bad way, but then one day it dawned on me, who am I too judge what another dos with there life, I mean I sure have done things that would be considered a crime, and I am thankful no one has wanted to hang me out to dry on a tree or anything.

    2. profile image0
      Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I think none of us (EDIT: except bredavies who also has a friend dealing with this) can form an opinion that is as valid as yours until we experienced this phenomenon as closely as you did. For this reason, I think you are "the most right" person among us. Still, I fancy the view that if you take revenge it may strengthen you by proving that you are not a victim and that you can actually protect yourself. Wouldn't someone feel more secure after taking revenge knowing that she could deal a mightier blow? (Immature viewpoint, I know.) smile

  6. Kaabi profile image59
    Kaabiposted 15 years ago

    I don't think that viewpoint is immature.  I'm sure in some cases, revenge would not be the best case, but as in most things in life, it is an individual-by-individual basis.  I'm sure some people could recover quickly if they could take revenge, and I'm sure there are some children who would like to know their fathers and some who wouldn't.  There is definitely not a one-size-fits-all answer for this, especially since it is so touchy.

    1. profile image0
      Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Absolutely.

    2. goodfriendiam profile image60
      goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      YA know I don't know about that, I mean I have done things real real bad to others, and I know from experience, it stayed with me for a long long time, just food for thought,

      1. profile image0
        Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

        Yes, we never discussed the other side. What if the rapist sincerely repents?

        1. goodfriendiam profile image60
          goodfriendiamposted 15 years agoin reply to this

          If your child comes home and ask for forgiveness, and you know they are sincere aren't you going to forgive them?

          1. profile image0
            Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            Well, it depends. If I can see that he has changed I am, but if I think he is only sincere I am not.

            1. Misha profile image65
              Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              So, unconditional love is something foreign to you...

  7. maven101 profile image72
    maven101posted 15 years ago

    Just to be clear about this, I have lived with a woman that had been raped, no children thank God, but psychologically damaged ...She offered herself to this creep that threatened her and a friend that was younger than her...she had been married before whereas the other woman had never been married and supposedly still a virgin...

    It never goes away, no matter how much you try, even with professional help...These women are still alive, but emotionally they are dead, and normal relationships are difficult if not impossible...

    1. profile image0
      Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I consider it the biggest crime committable to kill someone emotionally. That's why the initial opinion.

      1. maven101 profile image72
        maven101posted 15 years agoin reply to this

        [ This is true, Pacal...At least if you are dead you are finished suffering, but to have to live with what some think of as shame, because they submitted, and being unable to forgive themselves, inserts itself in almost every facet of their life..
        I would think that if I were a child of rape I would want to transfer that guilt to the rapist...shame the SOB and dog his every step making sure his friends and family know what he did...

        1. Luciendasky profile image60
          Luciendaskyposted 15 years agoin reply to this

          While I agree that sometimes I do have to deal with some uncomfortable issues, I do not consider myself dead inside. I consider myself stronger and I am thankful for every single day. I was "dead inside" for several years though... until I realized that I may not have had a choice in what happened to me, but I do have a choice on how I live the rest of my life and how I feel about it. And I chose happiness over sadness and healing over pain and I rarely ever even think about that time in my life anymore - probably less than once a year.

          1. profile image0
            Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            We are with you 100%.

          2. maven101 profile image72
            maven101posted 15 years agoin reply to this

            I admire your strength and resolve...some folks just aren't able to " move on "...for whatever reason...my girlfriend was one such, and still is, 40 years later...unmarried, bitter, and hostile to males...such is the legacy of a rape...

            1. Luciendasky profile image60
              Luciendaskyposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              That is very sad and my heart goes out to her.

          3. Misha profile image65
            Mishaposted 15 years agoin reply to this

            If I wasn't your fan already, I would become one on the spot smile

            1. Luciendasky profile image60
              Luciendaskyposted 15 years agoin reply to this

              That is very sweet of you to say smile

        2. profile image0
          Pacal Votanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

          Absolutely. And I honestly hope that victims don't take this issue so seriously, because it's not their fault.

          There is a reason why traditional cultures punished rapists most severely. Back then men were still required to have backbone. If you were on the level of someone who does this or other similar things it meant 1) you were a thread to society, 2) the tribe was ashamed of you, 3) you did not deserve to live. I hope that in the future (when the ear of mindless subversive liberalism finally has ended) crimes will be more severely punished.

  8. Luciendasky profile image60
    Luciendaskyposted 15 years ago

    What I mean to say is, I didn't have a choice then. I do have a choice now - and any pain I still go through by obsessing is my own fault.

  9. LVM profile image56
    LVMposted 15 years ago

    What a controversial question?  Let them know their fathers but don't let them know their mothers were raped.

    1. lrohner profile image67
      lrohnerposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I don't think that's quite the answer either. If I was one of those kids and was allowed to have a relationship with my father. And if found out when I was older that I was born because my father raped my mother, I'd have a WHOLE lot of problems not only with my Dad, but also with the adults who never told me.

      Besides, would you allow your minor child to be alone with a rapist?

  10. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 15 years ago

    This is a hot topic..... I believe it would depend on the circumstance and how they mother felt about disclosing the information. smile

 
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