I'd like feedback on my article: The Story of Mr Attique Family About Blood...

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  1. waqar anwar123 profile image52
    waqar anwar123posted 12 months ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
    Here is my article: The Story of Mr Attique Family About Blood sugar and blood pressure (must be signed in to view)

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image95
      Sherry Hewinsposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      The title is confusing. You need a title people will be searching for.

  2. k2khan profile image61
    k2khanposted 12 months ago

    I visited your article waqar, first things first you need to do is change the pictures of your article. Try to use cruelty free images such as pixabay, unsplash, etc and upload more appropriate images. Second, must check the grammer and plagiarism before uploading your articles.

    1. CYong74 profile image98
      CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      You mean royalty free.

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Deleted

        1. k2khan profile image61
          k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Yes you can also say royalty free!

        2. CYong74 profile image98
          CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          K2khan, there is no such thing as cruelty free pics; it's not a farm. Pixabay and Unsplash provide royalty free pics ie pictures that can be used without payment or attribution. Please don't mislead others.

          1. k2khan profile image61
            k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

            Yeah thanks for correcting me. Off course it's royalty free.

          2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
            Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

            Cyong, royality free, "yes, you can also say cruelty free"! The Pakistan English and its slang... I giggle!

    2. waqar anwar123 profile image52
      waqar anwar123posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Please tell me
      Which software use for check plagiarism ?

      1. theraggededge profile image98
        theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Don't worry about that. If you know you wrote it all in your own words, there's no need to check.

        1. k2khan profile image61
          k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Roger that theraggededge.

        2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Bev, I think plagiarism software were used mostly by online education institutions to check students assignments.

      2. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Check google for grammer and plagiarism softwares. Nowadays "Grammerly" is being used for grammer checking .

    3. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      K2khan, I agreed. In thi forum, speak our language-loyalty free, not cruelty free, and thanks.

  3. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Yes, I agree with Khan. You must have two free images to pass the quality assessment process. You can use "Grammarly" for you grammatical mistakes. Good luck.

    1. theraggededge profile image98
      theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Moondot, you don't need two images to pass QAP. One is sufficient. It depends on the article topic and its length.

      1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
        Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Moondot, theraggededged is welcomed.

    2. k2khan profile image61
      k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Alrighty Moondot.
      In my opinion, it's also very important to remove the grammatical mistakes in articles.

      1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
        Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        k2khan, I agreed.

        1. k2khan profile image61
          k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Thank you Miebakagh.

          1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
            Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

            K2khan, you're welcome.

  4. AliciaC profile image97
    AliciaCposted 12 months ago

    You need to correct the language errors in the article. You also need to be careful with respect to your health claims. For example, at the start of the second paragraph, you say that people should avoid spicy foods because they can cause high blood pressure (which at least in my part of the world is the same thing as hypertension). Some spices have been found to lower blood pressure, not raise it. In addition, you need to clarify what you mean by telling people to “avoid all fat” in the last paragraph. We need to eat some types of fat in our diet.

    I think you should go into more detail about the nutrients and their effects. The story in your article is interesting, but since your article is in the “Health” category you need to put more emphasis on the nutrient facts that you’ve included. You do include some useful advice, but a health article needs authoritative references to support all of the claims related to health and disease.

    1. k2khan profile image61
      k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Agreed Alicia.

    2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Alicia, has many points. The language issue is worrisome, and I am unable to go through such a read.

      1. AliciaC profile image97
        AliciaCposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        The article contains grammatical errors, but I had no problems in understanding it. The errors aren't so numerous or so bad that they can't be corrected.

  5. k2khan profile image61
    k2khanposted 12 months ago

    There should also be edit button on this forum so that it can be edited and corrected whenever someone makes a mistake.

    1. AliciaC profile image97
      AliciaCposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      There is an edit button. If you click on the "more" button under a post that you've made, you'll see the edit button. It's present for a limited period of time, however.

      If you correct an error that someone's already pointed out, I think it's polite to say that you've changed the post so it doesn't look as though the person was mistaken.

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Thank you Alicia, i did not notice before. Yes i have edited it.
        So nice of you.

      2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
        Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        That is the 'edit comment' button with a time limit 5 minutes.        Articles had they edit button enwine with capsule.

    2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Surely edit button is on  HP platform.

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Yes i got it miebakagh.
        I found out today that there is also an edit button in the forum.

        1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          K2khan, you're welcomed.

  6. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Bav G, thanks for letting me know.
    Someone from HubPages told me that two free images are necessary to pass the quality assessment process. That's why I said that.

    1. theraggededge profile image98
      theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Well they are mistaken. Some topics don't demand any images, but it's good to have at least one.

      It's Bev big_smile

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Respected Bev, you're quite right.

    2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Moondot, ask the theraggedged more about the photo. She has insight.

  7. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Thanks Miebakagh57, but no one is perfect. Anyone can make a mistake. Whether he is a Pakistani or from any other country. I hope you will agree.

    1. k2khan profile image61
      k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Certainly Moondot.

    2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Moondot, agreed that every one makes mistake.                          I am not targeting that.   You Pakistanis have unique English, different from America and British. Congratulations!  But sorry. HP wants none of these. Thanks.

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        I think Hubpages articles are written in American or British english. However pakistanis can write articles in both American and British, if there was another language HubPages would not accept it. If we wrote in another language, no one could understand or read it.

        1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          K2khan welcome home.

      2. AliciaC profile image97
        AliciaCposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        I'm not sure what you mean by "HP wants none of these." We can't assume that just because someone comes from a certain country they can't write acceptable English.

        1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Alicia, at HP standard America English (AE) or British English (BE) I think is a priority. It is very safe for me to say this.           But as regards to other nations or countries English, I am at a loss.     Grammarly has help me master AE to certain extent.            I am on another thread. The hubber was a Pakistan. We leverage along the language bringing it down to HP requirement. The guy ask me to sing again because his article got featured again. Thank you, Alicia.

        2. k2khan profile image61
          k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Respected Alicia, i told you guys international language is either American or british, we are writing articles following the rules of grammer on the Hubpages and the Hubpages is publishing our articles as featured ariticles.
          Thank you HubPages.

  8. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Yes, it's Bev. I wouldn't say I had a problem with my keyboard.

  9. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    AliciaC,  I would like to say that anyone can make a mistake. Whether he is a native English speaker or not. Like our mother tongue is Urdu but we can't write it perfectly. So it is a bad thing to laugh at someone's mistake.

    1. theraggededge profile image98
      theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Alicia isn't laughing at anyone. Why do you say that?

      1. Moondot1822 profile image89
        Moondot1822posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Bev, I did not talk about Alicia. She is very kind. I've just said that when someone makes a mistake in English, people laugh at it. Alicia said "We can't assume that just because someone comes from a certain country they can't write acceptable English." That's why I addressed her, and I agree with her.

        1. theraggededge profile image98
          theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Oh, okay, I thought you were rebuking her.

          Your English is pretty good, in fact.

    2. CYong74 profile image98
      CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Alicia C is obviously not laughing or mocking anyone. The same when I pointed out K2Khan's wrong description for free images.

      Like it or not, mechanically accurate English is a basic requirement here, and that's something anyone is capable of, provided he or she throws in the effort beforehand to learn. To go into the whole native speaker, mother tongue defense is lame, IMO. There is only that one set of English grammar rules wherever you are.

      1. k2khan profile image61
        k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Cyoung, i have corrected my one word mistake as per your advice and i was not misleading someone it was just one word mistake(cruelty) but when you google you will see the two terms royalty or cruelty that confused me at first but yes off course its royalty free.

        1. CYong74 profile image98
          CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          K2khan, I didn't direct that comment at you. It was in response to Moondot1812's comment, which I misunderstood as him chiding AliciaC.

          Which in turn arose from all the nonsensical replies posted by some other hubber here.

          But here's something you probably should also know about. You earn, and gain SEO traffic, from international viewers reading your hubs. You increase the chances of that by refining your hubs till they are acceptable for the niche sites.

          The old blogging trick of leaving comments all over the place, in hope that other hubbers visit and comment on your writing, is not going to help.  Actually, it may even do harm because of the bounce rate.

          In short, work on improving your writing and English, and SEO skills. Those are the only ways to get you traffic

          1. k2khan profile image61
            k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

            I got your point Respected Cyoung, i really liked your advice yes now im going to focus on my work again.
            Im Thankful to you!

  10. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Miebakagh57, I know you're not targeting. I'm just saying that when we share a post in a discussion, we don't pay much attention to  grammar. Because English is not our native language. I hope you don't mind. Stay blessed.

    1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Moondot, you're welcomed. Thanks.

  11. CYong74 profile image98
    CYong74posted 12 months ago

    Miebakagh57, no easy way to say this, so ...

    You've been flooding the forum with lame, near incoherent replies. Many of which are piggybacking off comments of others. Within this thread, your comments are creating confusion too.

    Please stop. What you're doing is called digital graffiti. I'm sure you also know us reading your profile or hubs isn't going to help your traffic or earnings. If that's your aim, you're wasting your time.

  12. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    I request now end this debate.

  13. Moondot1822 profile image89
    Moondot1822posted 12 months ago

    Thanks Bev G, that you are here. Lots of respect for you.

    1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
      Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      CYong74, have you ever visit any one of my hub and drop a comment? Nope! Visit the comment. I specific to you in this forum thread. Feel free to respond or not.               These new breeds have. And I am encouraging them. Thanks.

      1. CYong74 profile image98
        CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        And that is what's meant by digital graffiti.

      2. Miebakagh57 profile image52
        Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        CYong, respond well to my comment as a gentle man. Thank you.

        1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          You should explain satisfactory what you mean by digital gratiffi.

          1. CYong74 profile image98
            CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

            Digital graffiti is exactly what you have been doing. Spamming meaningless replies to everybody's comments, the likes of "I agree with ... please comply." "... is welcomed" Etc. All for the purpose of baiting people to visit your hubs and profile.

            I ignored it, but then you went overboard and made fun of K2Khan when I pointed out her error. And you did it more than once. You talked about gentlemanly. Was that gentlemanly?

        2. CYong74 profile image98
          CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Your comment barely make sense. How do you expect anyone to respond to it? Besides, you were the one making tasteless jibes when I pointed out K2Khan's mistake. Were you being gentlemanly, in your attempts to attract comments for your hubs?

          PS: To refer to a new hubber as "breed" is incredibly offensive. Do you even know the word is used for animals?

          1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
            Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

            CYong, I quote "royalty free (echoring your words) yes royalty, you can also say cruelty free(k2khan words). These. Paklstanis...my words"    I think this is where the misunderstanding arise and you should have said that to me.              Here's another quote "...k2khan, speak our language-loyalty free, not cruelty free,"  I think  I am okay here. Thanks.

            1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
              Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

              I am not the only one responding with just a sentence or two.             Breed(bred) also used to  describe plants and person, not just animals.  Thank you again.

              1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
                Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

                I think spamming in the forum can be easily detected by HP and penalty apply. I think also if a comment is not understand, it can be questioned. Both Bev and Linda did it. Much thanks again.

  14. theraggededge profile image98
    theraggededgeposted 12 months ago

    To make sense of the order of forum threads, you need to scroll to the top of the page and click on Chronological. Otherwise everyone gets into a tangle trying to work out who is responding to which comment.

    1. DrMark1961 profile image96
      DrMark1961posted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Yes, but it would not be nearly as entertaining!

      1. CYong74 profile image98
        CYong74posted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Das is on weekend break. Stepping in for him/her/it.

        1. theraggededge profile image98
          theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

          big_smile big_smile big_smile

        2. DrMark1961 profile image96
          DrMark1961posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          I am surprised that Fatfreddyscat has not jumped in on this thread yet. It has been, as Al Stine would say, "comedy gold". I have been searching everywhere for cruelty free images.

          1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
            Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

            Dr. Mark, I google and cannot get good result. Animal diet relate only.

            1. theraggededge profile image98
              theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

              Why? Really though, why would you do this? It was a typo. I expect it's down to auto-correct on OP's phone.

              "Cruelty free" normally relates to things like make-up that has not been tested on animals.

              1. k2khan profile image61
                k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

                I humbly request Bev to stop Miebakagh from repeatedly pointing out pakistanis and not try to hide his mistakes under my name and what penalty he is talking about?
                I have mentioned many times in my previous messages that it was just a one word mistake which i corrected on Cyong's advice then why he is esclating the matter.
                Im a newbie here and i'm still learning, i have analyzed that some seniors treat new hubbers in a very indecent way which is embarrasing.

                1. DrMark1961 profile image96
                  DrMark1961posted 12 months agoin reply to this

                  Calm down. People are just laughing but no one thinks you are dumb for that little mistake. Everyone in this world has made a mistake. We can choose to go off in a corner and pout about it, or just laugh and say "It was just a mistake. So what?"
                  Bev is not a moderator. She is just a nice person that has made comments on this thread.

                  1. k2khan profile image61
                    k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

                    Yeah, I admit that she is a really respectable person and I respect her from the bottom of my heart but miebakagh is using my name again and again in his comments which is why I am forced to comment. We also respect our seniours and hope that they respect us in the same way!

                2. theraggededge profile image98
                  theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

                  I'm afraid I can't prevent anyone from saying anything. Miebakagh is well-intentioned, I think, but does not always realise his words are inappropriate. The best thing to do is 'let it go'.

                  1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
                    Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

                    Hi all, the forum and the thread is interesting.       But I've learnt I ran into two troublesome like persons. None is dumb.   At the same, two old sea dogs and a newbie covering me! Bless my soul.                              Because I quote my comment not another to explain a misunderstand. I'm not "fake news!" lol!              That being said, I ask the two-some to absolve me. Thbnk you all.

              2. k2khan profile image61
                k2khanposted 12 months agoin reply to this

                The term" cruelty free images" is still available on google. But cruelty free images was something else i soon realized so i corrected my mistake and i admitted it.

            2. DrMark1961 profile image96
              DrMark1961posted 12 months agoin reply to this

              https://hubstatic.com/15106165_f1024.jpg

              Some of my bunnies. Definitely cruelty-free.

              1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
                Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

                Dr. Mark, you're making me giggle-giggle and laugh! You're welcome.

          2. Al Stine profile image95
            Al Stineposted 12 months agoin reply to this

            Thought this thread was too innocent to turn into comedy gold, wish I had stuck around to watch it go sideways.
            The forums never disappoint.... big_smile

            1. Miebakagh57 profile image52
              Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

              Hi all, its time to end the jaw jaw. How about awaking waqar to get his article featured?  Hint: let not too many cooks spoil the broth.

        3. Miebakagh57 profile image52
          Miebakagh57posted 12 months agoin reply to this

          Yep!

 
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