I'd like feedback on my article: Weight Loss Tips That Actually Work

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  1. Amy hassan profile image51
    Amy hassanposted 2 weeks ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Hubpages saying my article has chance to be published. its getting a very good traffic too. And I just cant get it how can i improve it more? plz guide
    Here is my article: Weight Loss Tips That Actually Work

    1. bravewarrior profile image94
      bravewarriorposted 2 weeks agoin reply to this

      I didn't get beyond your two first paragraphs because the copy is amateurish. I was interested in what actually works for weight loss based on the title. However, I went off the page once I read the two first paragraphs.

      Weight loss is a big topic, especially at the first of any new year. You need to show us why your weight loss tips actually work and provide links to your research at the end of the article. Additionally, document why these tips work as proven by personal experience. Before and after pictures of yourself would be a huge reason for readers to pay attention to and take credence in your article.

      1. Amy hassan profile image51
        Amy hassanposted 2 weeks agoin reply to this

        ok thanks i try to work on it

    2. OldRoses profile image97
      OldRosesposted 2 weeks agoin reply to this

      This is a saturated topic.  There are hundreds of thousands of articles already on the internet on the topic of weight loss.  Your article is not unique.
      It talks about tips that have already been recommended for years.  You should either talk about what helped you lose weight and why or find another topic to write about.

      1. Amy hassan profile image51
        Amy hassanposted 2 weeks agoin reply to this

        ok thank you, i will definitely improve it.

  2. psycheskinner profile image83
    psycheskinnerposted 13 days ago

    You recommend always having breakfast and also fasting.  It makes no sense at all to give contradictory advice. It suggests that you have no coherent point of view and are just collecting random pieces of advice given based on contradictory paradigms.

    1. Amy hassan profile image51
      Amy hassanposted 13 days agoin reply to this

      intermittent fasting does not mean that you cant have your breakfast. In this fasting type one have a cycle of eating and a cycle of fasting.  i asked for good suggestion by which i can improve it, not personal opinions or criticism that i collected these pieces, or whatever. These are just helpful tips some suitable for one person and some for others. Its not obligatory for readers to follow all of them. thanks. positive suggestions are much appreciated.

      1. psycheskinner profile image83
        psycheskinnerposted 12 days agoin reply to this

        If you only mean fasting for less than a day excluding breakfast you should say so.  But the advice to always have breakfast is based on avoiding extending the night time fast because fasting is bad for losing weight.  The meal is literally called "break fast".  If you think the two go together somehow, you need to explain it. On the face of it, it could not be more contradictory. if it is a collection of stuff that might help but is not meant to go together you should say that, but it undermines the appearance of expertise which is normally based on a single underlying paradigm or discipline with consistent advice.

  3. AliciaC profile image99
    AliciaCposted 13 days ago

    I notice that you have added some personal experience since I first looked at your article, which is good. You still haven’t added authoritative references for your nutritional claims, though. References are very important. In addition, you need to correct the grammatical and other language errors in the article. The word “I” is always capitalized. The fact that even in the bio at the top of the article you haven’t done this may dissuade some people from reading your article.

  4. Amy hassan profile image51
    Amy hassanposted 13 days ago

    ok thank u.. its really a helpfull suggestion.

 
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