How Can I Improve Favorite Records and Music of the 1950s?

1. 92

   Gloriousconfusionposted 2 years ago

   https://hubpages.com/entertainment/favo … -the-1950s
   
   I would welcome any help, thanks.

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2. 96

   PaulGoodman67posted 2 years ago

   Here's my honest and unvarnished opinion: your article feels a bit thin and unstructured.
   
   
   THE START
   
   Establishing an impression of expertise is useful.
   
   When you start the article with:
   
   "Let me take you through a snapshot view of the 1950s, a view skewed by the fact that I was not even a teenager in 1950, and by 1959 I was already a mother."
   
   This almost feels like the opposite to establishing authority, you seem like you're saying your experience is limited.
   
   The beginning of an article is the most important part. There's potential to lose the reader before you've even got going, if you're not careful.
   
   I would also start every article with an image. It's a general rule for magazine-style articles.
   
   
   BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT
   
   You say that:
   
   "Too much happened in those post-war years to give you all the cultural, historical and political details"
   
   This reads to me as you saying that there was important and interesting stuff going on, but you're not going to write about that.
   
   I think that if you're going to mention it, you should attempt to give an overview of what was happening in society at some point in the article. A hundred and fifty words might suffice and it doesn't necessarily have to come right at the start.
   
   
   STRUCTURE AND CONTENT
   
   The structure is chaotic. If you're going to have lots of sections, a table of contents would probably be advisable.
   
   Alternatively, you could simplify it and do it like a top ten, or suchlike. Maybe narrowing down the scope in some way would make it a more satisfying read? The article feels like it's not quite sure what it wants to be.
   
   I don't really get what the current structure is about? It doesn't really follow a chronology, or order of preference, as far as I can see. This matters, in my experience, because the reader likes to have a sense of progression and an idea where they're going.
   
   While the content might be relevant, it's jumbled, making it harder for the reader.

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   1. 92

      Gloriousconfusionposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for your detailed suggestions, Paul.  I shall consider them all carefully - I never realised all those points and there's clearly a lot to work on..

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      1. 71

         linhah lmposted 2 years agoin reply to this

         Hey Glorious Confusion, I remember you from Squidoo. And I can tell you it's very difficult to get featured on Hubpages. I have at least 3, maybe 4, high-quality articles that I cannot get featured, no matter how much I change them. I'll check your article out though and let you know, one way or another.

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         1. 85

            theraggededgeposted 2 years agoin reply to this

            Hi Linda, it's not difficult to get featured if you follow the guidelines. The Learning Center has a lot of information about producing quality articles.
            
            This kind of thing will prevent your articles from being featured though:
            
            
            
            Can you see the problem?
            
            Also that Dutch Oven article is way too short and has a ton of unrelated links in it. The editors will never pass it as it looks like an advertisement and is overly self-promotional.
            
            I checked out a few other ones and they all share similar issues. Too short, overly promotional, no structure, all advertising.
            
            There's an article on my profile about how to write a decent article. And there's a lot more info here:
            
            https://hubpageshelp.com/content/

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3. 92

   AliciaCposted 2 years ago

   Like Paul, I think the structure of the article is a problem. There doesn't seem to be enough text compared to the title in many capsules, and some of the titles are too long.
   
   I think you should move the Amazon capsule so that it's under a section where you've just talked about Elvis Presley, even though you've mentioned the singer underneath the capsule. It looks a bit strange under a picture about Bill Haley and his group. (The singer's name in the Amazon capsule is misspelled.)
   
   I assume that you took the album photos. It would be good to include that information somewhere in the article.

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   1. 92

      Gloriousconfusionposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks, Alicia.  Much work to be done on the article, I fear, but all the suggestions should help me with any other articles too.

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      1. 92

         AliciaCposted 2 years agoin reply to this

         You're welcome, Diana. There's another point that I should have mentioned in my first post. Your offer to sell your Frankie Lane record to readers may have been viewed as promotional.

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4. 92

   Gloriousconfusionposted 2 years ago

   Would it be best to delete this article completely and start a new one with the same information, but set out according to Paul and Alicia's advice, or is there some benefit in retaining an article which has only ever had 189 visits over quite a long period?

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   1. 96

      PaulGoodman67posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      How much work you put into it is up to you. You can go on Google and see what the competition out there is like. It's worth researching before you expend a lot of time and energy. Your aim is to equal or better what already exists, as far as your article goes.
      
      I would use the article that you already have, rather than starting again from scratch, should you decide to work on it further. It's easier to manipulate material that already exists, rather than begin with a blank page, in my experience. Many of my articles have been reworked multiple times.
      
      A tip for style and structure is to look through the front pages of the HubPages niche sites, find something that you like, and copy the structure, style, etc. Obviously, don't copy the actual content, but everything else can serve as a guide to what HP wants and sees as a successful approach.

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      1. 92

         Gloriousconfusionposted 2 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks, I'll try that

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5. 71

   linhah lmposted 2 years ago

   I read your article thoroughly and liked it. I love Marilyn Monroe and Barbie dolls in poodle skirts. I liked the music you picked too, Elvis, Bill Haley and the Comets, Frankie Laine, and Harry Belafonte.
   I did take issue with two misspellings, though. The first was when you're talking about morays; I think it's spelled mores. Also, Brylcreem is spelled out four times; I think the one time you spelled it Brylcream was right. But don't take my word for it; look it up!

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