Constructive Criticism

1. 62

   ns1209posted 14 years ago

   Hi, I think I am doing OK on Hubpages however I would quite like a few people just to check if I am doing everything OK and what could be improved! 
   
   I suppose I would like this hub checked the most http://hubpages.com/hub/Buy-Kinect hub
   
   Thanks for any help on any other my hubs and any constructive criticism is welcomed!

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   1. 57

      climberjamesposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Hmm the link does not appear to be working?

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   2. 57

      AdrienneMposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Hi ns1209,
      
      Is is possible hub removed our content because you were selling this product Kinect?  It seems to show that the page does not exist.

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   3. 57

      AdrienneMposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Okaaay thanks to Joe8943 I found it and I agree it a very good article. It gives just what it says it will, after reading I was thinking about making a purchase.  Of course I have to agree with him...there are grammar issues, minor, but you might want to proof read more than once.  First to see if the reading makes sense, then to check for spelling and like that.  That always helps me.
      Adrienne Michel
      P.S. I would sure appreciate if you could do the same for me. There has got to be a reason that I can't get any comments.  Boring? To Confused?
      http://hubpages.com/hub/myownwealthyaffiliatereview and http://hubpages.com/hub/first-date-communication-tips

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2. 65

   Joe8943posted 14 years ago

   If this is the one your talking about http://hubpages.com/hub/Buy-Kinect I thought it was good, a few grammar and spelling errors but well written.  You might also want the bigger picture of the Kinect on the top versus the Amazon capsule, the small picture is a little distracting.  Plus not many people would even click on the Amazon capsule until reading the article anyway so having it lower may also help clicks.

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3. 62

   ns1209posted 14 years ago

   Yes Joe that was the one I was talking about - sorry the link does not work!
   
   Moved the bigger picture up and the amazon one down - thanks for the advice.

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4. 65

   Joe8943posted 14 years ago

   no problem, a second set of eyes always helps

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5. 57

   climberjamesposted 14 years ago

   Looks good to me
   
   I would swap the first picture to the second text module if it was mine.
   
   I like to keep the right hand first ad unit right at the top, but that's just me

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6. 62

   ns1209posted 14 years ago

   OK thanks for the advice.

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7. 73

   Jeff Berndtposted 14 years ago

   Here's a suggestion:
   
   This sentence:
   
   "Kinect is not instead of controllers, it is to complement them and give the Xbox 360 the best control system around."
   
   is awkwardly constructed. Perhaps a smoother construction would be:
   
   "Kinect is not meant to replace controllers but to complement them...."
   
   or perhaps:
   
   "Kinect does not replace controllers; it complements them, giving the ...."
   
   Best of luck!

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8. 86

   Marisa Wrightposted 14 years ago

   Your first three paragraphs are too rambling.  If you want to sell Kinect boxes, you have to get to the point much faster.
   
   The tip about keeping the top right-hand corner free for Adsense ads is spot-on - that's your prime spot for people to click.  If you're not signed up for Adsense, put your Amazon ads there.

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9. 77

   Aficionadaposted 14 years ago

   AdrienneM,
   
   For me, it took a while before the comments started coming.  Don't give up!  I don't know why some Hubs get comments and others don't, but it does seem to happen that way.

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