How do you deal with failures personally? What works for you?
I personally try to change the definition of failure, and look for a success in the situation. I suppose this is similar to the glass half empty vs. half full thing.
Yes, I do that too, looking at the positive side of the situation (if one can find one). If not, by looking at past failures and finding inspiration in how I was able to come out of them!! Thanks Steve for answering this question!!
I write a poem and then outline a short story about the experience while it is still fresh in my mind. And tell myself, "It is how we handle failure, not sucess, that defines our character."
Failure is a part of life that we have to deal with. Life is far from perfect and we all make mistakes.
I assume you have a recent failure in mind, try and review the situation objectively. Write a list of the points down on paper, such as what failed, was it your fault or someone eles's ?
If it was something you did or did not do that caused the failure, consider why and how you can correct the error.
Don't dwell on it, either you can or you can not do something about it.
If you can... Do it and mark it up as a success.
If you can not... Then you may have to write it off to experience and move on.
But above all Learn all you can from the experience, as I said we all fail sooner or later and it will happen more than once.
Trick is not to fail at the same thing twice.
Hope this helps.
Well, I find a failure can be turned into a postive thing. If you are not able to learn from your failures, you have truly wasted your experience.
"A man or woman should not be judged on their fall, but how they pick themselves back up" (does that make sense)
I fear failure. But I fear not learning from the failures even more. If I do fail, I sit back and take a deep breath and write down the positive aspects of my life.
we do lots of things in this helter skelter from birth to death, some we win, some we lose, it's the way of the world.
There is no failure. There is only an interesting outcome to be observed and then move on.
What some people might consider a failure is actually an opportunity for learning and growth.
Perception is reality, if you change the way you view things you have in fact changed the thing itself.
Read: "The Art of Racing in the Rain" by Garth Stein.
Personally I evaluate the failures and know that I will not ever do it again. i think on how they came about and find my weaknesses because normally a failure comes from a weakness and mine is peoples' feelings.
Right now in my life I am actually going through this and I am trying to separate other people from what I want because that too was my failure. Every failure isnt something to be ashamed of it's a bad choice and a lesson I hope you and I comprehended the first time.
I accept that I can't change the past and remind myself not to make the same mistake again. And look towards improving myself and avoiding the same failure again.
What works for me is to do an objective review of the failure and what happened enroute to that point. If I am honest with myself and not looking for a scapegoat, I will look at each aspect to determine how my actions affected the results each time asking myself if I did the best that I could given the circumstances. I said it that way for a reason. When you join the work force and are assigned projects or tasks, most of the time they come with constraints and parameters that must be met. Many times, these are much too stringent yet the lack of experience with the particular situation is not there to guide the parties. In effect, they have been doomed to failure from the outset. It is the same reasoning that we use in reconstructing aircraft crashes...to find the point at which things went wrong, learn from it, put things in place to guard against a reccurrence, and move on. Hope this helps. Thanks. WB
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