Would YOU Support An Adult Child Who Would NOT Accept A Job After

1. 83

   gmwilliamsposted 11 years ago

   
   HE/SHE Had Obtained The Necessary Degrees
   This thread was inspired by fellow hubber Frantisek78 during a previous thread on a similar subject.  The scenario is that you have an adult child who has obtained a Bachelors, Masters, or a Ph.D Degree.  The major is irrevelant at this point.   Now, since your child's graduation, jobs were offered to him/her; however, these jobs were below his/her educational requirements.e.g. a salesclerk, clerical/typing jobs, receptionist, lower level administrative jobs, and/or lower level customer service jobs.   
   
   Your child adamantly asserts that if HE/SHE takes such jobs, this means that HE/SHE will start at the very bottom. He/she then explains to you that if he/she starts at such a low level, there will be a SCANT CHANCE  that he/she will be highly successful in the future.   In his/her estimation, he/she turns down such jobs.  He/she maintains that it is FAR BETTER to be unemployed than to take such McJobs.   He/she is going to wait until a job that is commensurate with his/her education.   In other words, it is his/her intention to start at the top or as near the top as possible with a very high 5-figure salary.  He/she furthermore feels that as parents, it is YOUR obligation to support him/her and provide him/her with the usual amenities until he/she finds the jobs that HE/SHE WANTS.
   
   Now debate this pro and con.

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   1. 94

      wildernessposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I would absolutely support her.  Pick her up, just as I did when she was small, and support her all the way outside, whereupon the support ends and her butt hits the sidewalk.

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   2. 56

      MissJamieDposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Well, it sort of depends on the age of the child. If they're 30 and still aking excuses as to why they don't have a job while holding several degrees, send them packing. You'd be enabling them.
      
      If they're under 25, I say give them a bit to figure out what they would LIKE to do instead of just sitting around waiting for jobs to be handed to them. After that, between 25-30 you need to decided whether you want to allow them to leech off you any longer. Just because they're your child does not mean you have to treat them like one, when they're actually an adult. Part of being an adult in this country is getting on your own two feet. Starting at the bottom is something most of Americans do, it's the American way. Yes there are some well-off citizens that are given a position in a company by family members/friends, but they still have to start jobs from the beginning no matter where they step in. You're always the beginner whether you're an attorney or a cashier at Walmart. it takes experience to be the best at something, to deserve raises, and other benefits.

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2. 92

   peeplesposted 11 years ago

   Yes and no. I would support my child the way a parent should and in my opinion a parent should tell a child what life is really about. Life IS about starting at the bottom and working your way up. Life is not about getting what you want all the time when you want it. Who would be supporting this child while they waited for that high end job? Part of growing up is doing what you have to do to get where you want to go and doing nothing gets you nothing.

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3. 78

   psycheskinnerposted 11 years ago

   I think you should get a reasonable period of time to find work in a specialized field, and a bus ticket to whatever city that jobs ends up being in.
   
   But eventually, you get your belonging in a box on the sidewalk and a warm welcome to being a grown ass person responsible for your own bills.

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4. 75

   Cantuhearmescreamposted 11 years ago

   I don’t know that I could ever turn my child away; of course I am a pushover anyway. However, if my child were bright enough and ambitious enough to achieve such a degree then I would suspect my child wouldn’t want to resort being dependent upon me. I also think that it says a lot about someone who has the drive and determination to obtain a higher education and work themselves into a good job. Some of the smartest, most successful people have worked at the fast-food counter or bagged groceries. In short, I think that I would absolutely encourage my child to take the best job that is available at that time and continue to proactively seek better opportunities. In America today, no one can really afford to sit back and wait for someone else to take care of them. The ideal situations just may be harder and harder to come by.

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   1. 50

      ritsukakunxposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Yes. They can work the job while they wait for a better position. What is the point of just sitting around?

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5. 93

   habeeposted 11 years ago

   Does the adult child have kids? I could never let my grandchildren do without, but I could give my grown son or daughter some "tough love."

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6. 83

   gmwilliamsposted 11 years ago

   No, HE/SHE does not have children nor is married but is a degreed graduate who WILL NOT accept a job unless it is commensurate with his/her respective educational level whether it is a Bachelor's, Master's, or Ph.D. Degree level.   He/she has been offered jobs but they were below his/her respective educational level.

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   1. 0

      Sarra Garrettposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      He/She needs to accept what ever job comes their way.  Degree jobs are far and few between in this economy and of course it depends on what their degree is in.  Any job is better than no job.  Everyone starts at the bottom. It is lot easier to find another job while you are working most times.  The adult child needs to even see if moving to a different place is applicable to get a job in their field.  I would support them, however, they have to work or out they go.  The adult child needs to learn that life isn't easy and you have to work hard for what you have or want.  My son worked all through high school as did I.  It starts a good work ethic.  My son also knew that at 18 he paid rent and food or he could pay it to someone else.  It's called responsibility.

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7. 50

   ritsukakunxposted 11 years ago

   Honestly, they should take the job. A lower job is better than no job, right? Lots of people would love to work the job but cannot because they don't have the education. Why would they not take this job?
   
   I'd be pretty mad at my kid. I'd say "take the job or live on the street."
   
   Honestly, the kid needs to learn to live in the real world, which means sometimes taking something that isn't 100% your idea of the greatest job on the planet. As long as the pay is OK (at least $10~$12 for a starter isn't THAT bad) they should do it.

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8. 78

   psycheskinnerposted 11 years ago

   I think it is reasonable to wait as long as 6 months focusing fully on getting that dream job.  But after that you take what you can get. At one time I had a Masters degree and was working as a school cleaner.

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   1. 94

      wildernessposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That was my basic response when my kids got out of high school, and would have been had they not had a job when graduating college.  I'll provide your support for 6 months, but by then you're either working (or going on to college) or on the street.  If the child remained at my home while working they would help pay the costs of the home.
      
      Unspoken was that any money they "helped" with would be saved and in a few months it would be used to start renting with.

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   2. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      +1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

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