Well your question has the answer in it. Ok let me put it this way: Isn't marriage for life? (I personally feel it is the whole attitude that "this is it" and for the rest of my life I have to learn to deal with this)
PS: I am aware of exceptions like abusive relationships and what I stated was my personal opinion about marriage(especially mine) and not an attempt to generalize marriage.
Indians are always hesitating in each and everything. Why such a hesitation to tell what is good? To whomsoever it may appeal, let them take it. Dont worry about others.
- unconditional love and loyalty...
- respect each other...
- make him your everything...your man, your lover and your bestfriend!!!
How do I know who's right? and who's not?
To divine this answer I will need chicken bones, blood of shaved yak, peyote, an original copy of Dark Side of the Moon on vinyl, and $200 sent to Nigeria.
That's one of the most challenging questions, because so many people truly believe they marry the right person, only to discover, when/if big troubles come; it turns out there wasn't enough of foundation to the relationship after all. Some parts of people's personalities/coping styles, etc., don't show up until something happens that reveals them.
Maybe what people need to do is really, really, understand what "mature and well adjusted" is (and honestly ask if both people are mature and well adjusted), learn about how birth order can affect how a person deals with things, and learn about the other's family and how people dealt with things. Maybe, too, if there are even minor signs of something not being quite right in the relationship during dating; don't do the "well adjusted and reasonable thing" of overlooking such signs and thinking, "I can't expect it to be perfect." It should feel perfect if it's right.
Yup. I would say make love an act of will, not a feeling. Feelings are fickle, but if both of you are committed to marriage, it'll work great in the good times, and you'll be able to gut it out in the hard times. It's worked so far for us anyway!
Marry and promptly be locked into your own lovely mausoleum! You won't have long to put divorce papers through!
Or write your will, for that matter.
GM, silly thang. I recommend that your marriage reach that *companionate* stage after the *honeymoon* stage wears off
My companion is sitting on my shoulder, grinding his teeth happily with his eyes half-closed. =P
What's this marriage thing? A ploy for easy intimate liaisons? One of these days I gotta get on board with the bulk of humanity and start using my hormones for good use. ;P
Peace and Love,
Complete trust, faith in one another, honesty and be open about your feelings. And like froggy said--marry the right person
What are my chances the right person is in the back of my copy of "OC Weekly" and she just happens to be in Russia, looking for the right person too...?
First understand yourself. Then understand the purpose of marriage.. not only for sex.. just a companion for life full of emotions, ups and downs... Then understand your opposite.
Place yourself in his or her position and then analyse their behaviour.. If you find it reasonable and you in that place would have done the same thing... then forgive and forget. Think that everyday you get a new life and learn to live as an youngster; make your partner happy and be happy yourself.
Emperor Akbar of India (17th century- ruled Delhi for 64 years) started a new religion called "Theene Ilahi" which preaches that we should place ourself in the opposite and analyse others' behaviour. What are all we hate, we should not do to others. Eventhough the religion has died, its preachings are fit for all seasons!
You are God in the form of Sivagna...and I am the same God in the form of Capable Woman. This way of thinking creates compassion for each other (at least for my mind it does).
Still...I don't know if this helps you stay married or keep a hot girlfriend...
Don't look for a perfect person but love the imperfect person perfectly.....
Love like light ..respect him/her...you will be happily married forever.....
Please dont go in search of imperfect person... Select anyone and love him perfectly. If your love is perfect, there will be no need to worry about perfection of the opposite.
Respect him... that will make him perfect.
Then he will win the client's case. And lose his own case.
I agree with Janetta's comment but would add really listening and remembering.
I read it on a quoted T-Shirt and this quote is very old but because no one has spoken it yet so I will steal the opportunity. it is very simple
MARRY SOMEONE WHOM YOU CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT AND NOT SOMEONE WITH WHOM YOU WANT TO LIVE.
The spouse's mistakes should be overlooked. Make her happy by turning every one of her/ his words as jokes and make her laugh whenever she tries to bite you. Even the harshest words should not be taken seriously... There are tactics to overturn their words against themselves. But before that find out where the mistake is... if it is yours, say sorry! If it is hers, take it into your mind and apply whenever she accuses you for the same mistake. Instant retarding will complicate things... Take breathe, select words and then apply. Men or women, everyone wants a cute and intelligent partners..... so, try to be more intelligent than her or him.
Ride out the bad times thinking about the good ones! It´s like a roller coaster ...grit your teeth during the scary parts. Treasure the moments, a kiss, a hug, and during the bad times go those "happy moments". But...it´s hard! (married 18 years this January arghhh!!!)
Always remember that the truth of human romantic relationships is that someone is in charge. Someone has to be. Make sure it's you.
The one who loves least is the one who controls the relationship. I think Dr. Phil said that...he's a turd but that statement is true.
Does this sound cynical? If so, just know that my GF is 10 years younger than me and gets mistaken for Angelina Jolie all the time and, oh yeah, and she's a genius, witty and mad about me.
Every other girl she's ever known has fallen all over themselves to be with her. Don't do that even if every bit of you wants to.
Counter-intuitive but truth.
hmmm..I may write a hub about this
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