What is important to you - your career or looking after your old parents?

1. 74

   Zubair Ahmedposted 14 years ago

   What is important to you - your career or looking after your old parents?
   
   So many people these day's are unable to look after and support their old parents, in most old people end up in old-age homes.  Almost treated as outcasts by the own offspring's - and the simple excuse is I have my career to build.
   
   

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2. 65

   the clean lifeposted 14 years ago

   Forget the career. The job can always be found or gone back to, but our parents are only here once. It is our responsablity to take care of our parents as they did for us bringing us up to be adults.  I left my job for 3 weeks to take care of my Dad as the hospital sent to home with Hospice to die. After funeral was over I then went back to work. Parents first, Job second!

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3. 77

   figmentposted 14 years ago

   I'm disabled and me and my father are roommates.  I would definitely choose taking care of my father over a career,

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4. 77

   Ruchiraposted 14 years ago

   A beautiful question and we all are going through this phase in our lives where career vs old parents is an issue...
   
   I am trying to keep a balance on both by visiting them more often and keeping them well equipped with all the facilities and at the same time, working on my existing career. I also rely a lot on omens and destiny and am hoping that if my career shows me one...it will be towards that direction i.e work in the city where parents live.

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5. 83

   gmwilliamsposted 14 years ago

   I believe that both are important.  A person can be both devoted to his/her career and looking after an aged parent.  A person with a high paying and high powered career is more likely to hire a paid caretaker to look after the ailing parent.  A person who gives up a career to look after an aged parent is only doing himself/herself  an extreme disserve.  That person could become embittered and start neglecting and abusing their ailing parents because of their own unfulfilled dreams and goals.

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6. 60

   philirodjeposted 14 years ago

   This is a lovely question,,,
   I would love to do the two at the same time but since i cannot do that, i have to do one at a time so i would look for help while i go to work and when i return, i will take over from the help.
   I think with this, there shouldn't be any problem.

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7. 60

   Dr. Wendyposted 14 years ago

   My Mom is already gone and what I would give to have her here and be able to take care of her.  I've given up much of my life for my kids and wouldn't think twice about taking care of a parent.  If my Dad ever needs me, I will be there.

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8. 65

   silvatungfoxposted 14 years ago

   This is not a simple decision to make.  I made the decision to return to my parents home almost 10 years ago now to care for them. 
   It is not always easy to care for a parent, especially my old man since for the first two years I was here caring for them Dad would get mad and try to throw me out of the house.  I finally was able to make peace with him by pointing out that I was not going away since Mom needed me and he was not able to care for her in the manner she required.
   About four years ago now, Dad put himself into renal failure through the mis-management of his medications.  Thankfully he recovered despite the prognosis that he would not last through the night.  I was, however, forced to put him into a nursing home as he needed nursing care that I was not trained to provide and around the clock attention that was quickly depleting my physical health.  It was Mom's decision as she decided she could not watch him kill me slowly.
   Up until 2010 we would go visit him everyday in the nursing home.  In 2010 Mom had breast cancer return from 20 years earlier only now it was bone cancer on her spine and was so painful she could not draw breath.  I almost lost her, but managed to get her home again and through diet and round the clock care she is now doing very well.   I opted not to tell her how painful all the doctors said this disease would be, and worked on getting her as healthy as possible with diet and carefully selected nutritional supplements. We don't get over to see Dad everyday anymore, as it is too tiring for Mom, but we do go frequently and I have never regretted my decision to move back and care for the family.
   As to my career, I suppose I have just moved on to one I can work on from the computer.  I am now a published author with another book coming out soon, a woman of the year award from the National Professional Women's Assoc., a quilter  and have a few photography awards.  I can always build another career, I cannot build another Mother or Father.

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9. 60

   fallenpixie09posted 14 years ago

   Looking after my old parents. They fed and clothed me and put a roof over my head for 18 years. They also shaped me into the person I am today. I owe them more than just taking care of them.

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10. 60

    duffsmomposted 14 years ago

    I am an only child and when I was 8, my dad died.  When I was 15 my mom died of cancer and I was alone.
    
    So I come at this question from a little different perspective.  Nothing can replace family and if one's parents were there for their child, the child needs to find room for them in their current lives.  I know it can't be easy, but family comes first.

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