How does taking care of a parent make you feel?

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   ReneeDC1979posted 12 years ago

   How does taking care of a parent make you feel?
   
   Our parents raise and took care of us.  So what happens when the tables are turned?

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   MsDoraposted 12 years ago

   Renee, I'm taking care of my mother right now, but she has Alzheimer's and her Alzheimer's has me.  I feel sorry for her when I see how confused she is; I feel helpless when she begins to call me names; but I also feel that I am where I should be, doing what I should be doing.  I'm an only child.  I intend to give her all the care and respect she deserves--always!.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you MsDora.  I know how that is -I remember when my grandmother had it - after a while I think she only recognized my nephew- Keep pushing - thank you for your comments and for stopping by.  Keep hubbing!

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      shampa sadhyaposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      My mother had this disease and she was taken care of by her children. Being her daughter I feel it is quite satisfying. It should not be avoided at any cost.

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   cat on a soapboxposted 12 years ago

   Hi Renee,
   Taking care of parents is a responsibilty that must be met. It grieves me to see elderly people ignored and left w/o loving company and  health advocacy. Both my parents and in-laws are deceased, and I miss them greatly although both my husband and I feel relief that the responsibility of caregiving is over. Taking care of a parent brings all kinds of feelings including sadness, helplessness, anger, and frustration. My mother was able to afford an excellent tiered -care facility and made the decision to get in while she was still ambulatory. Thankfully, I was able to concentrate on overseeing the care, take her to doctor's appts, and spend quality time visiting because her mind was still sharp. My father-in-law wanted to stay in his own home, and this was more difficult because the time/travel demands were greater.Memory loss, stroke, and drug-induced confusion are some of the worst scenarios as is the pain of terminal illness. When ill or facing the end of one's life,  loving and un-rushed companionship is the most important thing one can offer.  It can be truly rewarding to share this time.  It is also necessary to address these issues w/ parents and make a medical directive before the need arises.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you cat on a soapbox.  Very profound.  Thanks for your words of wisdom and for stopping by.  Keep hubbing!

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   DDEposted 12 years ago

   Taking care of our parents should be a priority not only to give back your time to them but to let them know you love and want to take care of them in any way. Most parents are neglected when they get older it is not right for parents to be treated that way. Taking care of my parents would make me feel great getting to know them again is just part of life

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you DDE.  I agree more people should feel the need to take care of their parents.  Thanks for stopping by and keep hubbing!

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   twig22bendposted 12 years ago

   Taking care of my parents being one of the hardest things that I have done. Due to illness not so much age, the task was difficult. This not a complaint. I was not prepared for the change in their mental  status due to medical treatments and medication, pain and fear of the unknown.
   
   I really had to adjust mentally  to the change in behavior and their coping with their illness, during this time.You really have to prepare yourself  mentally, the best you can in order to give the loving care that is needed.
   
   I do know that I did my best to see that they were well taken care of properly, and would gladly do it again.. Patience and understanding is needed during this period  and time of their lives.

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   liesl5858posted 12 years ago

   It would be a pleasure to look after my parents when they can't look after themselves. I already made up my mind that when my father becomes so old and can't look after himself, I have to go home and look after him. My father did a lot for me that I am so grateful about, my mother too when she was alive. My mother is dead and we have a loving stepmother who is with our father at present. I work as a carer here in England and the amount of old people living in their own homes that I have seen is a lot but they are struggling to get by. Even though they say they have children. I would hate to see my father uncared for in his old age.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Great points liesl5858.  Thanks for stopping by,and keep hubbing.

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   khmazzposted 12 years ago

   Like Ms Dora, I too am taking care of my mother.  Most of the time it fills my heart with such joy that I am able to give back to her the love and care she has given to me all of my life.  Sometimes it is frustrating though, which I am sure she felt the same from time to time during my up bringing.  I love my mother with all of my heart and I will do everything in my power to care for her to the best of my ability because that is what she would do (and has done) for me my whole life.

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   wqaindiaposted 12 years ago

   Taking care is one thing but I could not make my mother free from paralytic pain. Some times we are help less creatures in front of God's wishes.

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   PoojaMehta0911posted 12 years ago

   I love my mom and dad a lot.. They have always treated me like their princes and given me loads of love and care.. Today when my dad is unwell i feel bad for a while but the convince myself as its a part of life. I get internal satisfaction when i nurse ma dad and feel good, but cant see him in pain. I'll do my duty to my best and hope he recovers fast.

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    prosolsposted 12 years ago

    Our Parent can raise 10 children at the same time having the best care of them but 10 children cant raise or take care of single parent. we cant take care of our parents as they do but what ever we do (if we are doing) gives us the charm of paying back which for me is impossible for any child to pay back exactly what their parents give but at least a try gives eternal happiness to both ...

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    Nirmal MNposted 12 years ago

    It's an important responsibility for every children to take care of his/her parents after adolescent. I feel very happy to take care of my parents. Because, without my parents i am not here in this world. They caring me very much with lot of love. So i am having responsibility to take care of them.
    
    http://www.classiblogger.blogspot.com

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    Abby Campbellposted 12 years ago

    I haven't had to take care of parents yet, but I have a 25 year old daughter who is handicapped and in a nursing home. She has autism and encephalopathy (a degenerative brain disease). Because of this, I don't see much difference in taking care of her as I would an elderly parent. I still am her legal guardian who oversees her medical care and living arrangements. I'm saddened that I don't have the energy both physically and mentally to care for her at home. The mental instability she possesses is the most difficult part of taking care of her, and my heart bleeds for anyone who has to take care of elderly parents with Alzheimer's or dementia. I can only pray that my parents will continue to be healthy until their last day.

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    Cordelia Bayposted 12 years ago

    Renee, My parents divorced when I was two...I was raised by my dad. At the age of 39, I began taking care of my mom and did so for a period of ten years until her passing in 2010. It was both a difficult and rewarding path. There are so many things and reasons why people act the way they do....one should not stand in judgment but seek understanding, wisdom and knowledge of the things that seem to have no understanding. My siblings thought that my mom was cruel and flat out mean...and, I must agree that at times she was! But, when the truth was revealed, she was just scared of being forgotten, alone and unloved. When she discovered that I was not going to let her walk through the remainder of her life alone....she was loving, considerate and giving and forgiving of all the past hurts that were created either by my actions or the lack of them.
    
    I am truly grateful and thankful to have been given the opportunity to be in her life and both give and receive strength to one another.

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       twig22bendposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       I experienced similar reactions from my mom. At the end I realized that she had issues that she did not know how to deal with, which made her behave the way that she did with others. All is forgiven.

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       Cordelia Bayposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       That's great. Both my parents are gone...I miss them and think that one should try to be more understanding.

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