Parents ~ When is the best time to tell a child, that he or she is adopted?
Is there a best time for adoptive parents to reveal it?
When do you tell your adopted child that they are adopted? At the earliest possible age that they will understand. read more
Probably if I were to adopt a child, I am going to tell her/him about the adoption once he/she can understand the meaning of the word and when I am sure that the kid is assured of our love for him or her.
I would be talking about it from the time the child was able to hear my voice. To wait and tell them later is cruel and can have very adverse effects. Talk about it from day one, so that they always know how special they are, and how very much they are wanted.
better not to tell in my point of view, people think they are more practical and tell their adopted child that he/she is not their own son/daughter. if something will hurt someone don't tell it even its true.
I do not understand why there should be a waiting period.My aunt was told that she was adopted when she was a teen and she took it hard.She felt betrayed by my grandmother for holding this truth from her.Telling them early will not change the love that they will have for you.I think it cruel if a school age child developes a relationship with someone only to find out that they are related.Not telling is almost like living a lie, a lie that could hurt the child later.
My daughter knows she is adopted and we have "gotcha day", "adoption day" and "birthday". I keep it as we adopted each other. There is a picture of me holding her with the Judge who granted the adoption. I made a quilt for her with our important dates on it.
Her story is, "Mommy, before we found each other I was looking for a Mommy and a Daddy and a Sister but no brothers cuz they're icky, but I'm sure glad you're my Mommy." She has asked if we could adopt each other again, and so we made up "Adoption Vows" and said them to each other in our living room--just the two of us.
When she wanted to know if she grew in my tummy, I explained that she grew in someone else's tummy but she grew in my heart. But then when she asked how she was born, I told her, "in a hospital!"
I think a child should hear about adoption and know they are adopted from the very beginning.
From the time that the child enters into your life, it needs to know you love it enough to love it even though you did not create it. That is what God does too and God is the creator of all children.
I believe you should tell a child he is adopted at an early age. You don't want someone else to slip and mention it in front of him/her. You want them to know you chose them and they are very special. Our daughter and son-in-law adopted a boy when he was an infant,they started to talk to him about it when he was about 4 years old. You don't have to go into great detail at first, let him ask questions on his/her own. My grandson is now 21 years old and going to college.
I am the proud mom of two adopted children. We have owned and read books like "Tell Me Again About the Night I was Born" by Jamie Lee Curtis since before my children could talk. (There are a ton more great books too) My kids are both very aware of where they are from, who their birth parents are, and who their birth sibblings are. We make sure that our children know that they are loved by two families. I will honestly say that when my husband and I had planned to adopt this issue was very scary to us, it took a lot of communication and research to decide how we would handle this. I believe we made the right decision. I don't doubt that my children will question "who they are" or wonder where they would be if.....
All we can do as parents is answer their questions honestly and support their feelings about it as they grow.
by Dawn Michael 9 years ago
part of realiy hub series, your answer may be used in the next reality hub, driving traffic to your page.
by colp 10 years ago
I was always aware from a very early age that I had been adopted at only 7 days old and it was arranged before I was born. This may fly in the face of what everyone says but I always wished I NEVER knew, that I'd never been told... I grew up feeling different from everybody else and my...
by grumpiornot 5 years ago
If you adopted a child, would you be offended if they wanted to find their biological parents?Adoptive parents share their lives with their children and yet, they must live with the fact that at some stage, their children will seek out their biological parents. Is that a snub to the adoptive...
by Kristi Sharp 8 years ago
Do you have a moral obligation to tell a child they are adopted?
by Levu 4 years ago
what is the most important thing that an adopted child should know his or her biological parent?
by Kawai 4 years ago
If you adopt a child would you tell him/ her that he/she was adopted, and if so when?If you adopted a child who is the same race as you (so basically nobody would know you adopted unless you tell), would you tell the child he/she was adopted? If so, would you tell the child since they are young or...
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