Nothing Says Merry Christmas like selfish family members using us!!!
Thanks Miss Take...and yea that picture is of my Papa holding me when I was just a little baby.
Back when I was actually cute 
thanks alexa I definitely need the hugs today virtual or real
thanks those were the days when my mom had to tape bows into my hair because I hardly had any
I am so sorry Crazd. Isn't it wonderful the amount of crap some people can put on facebook?
And, unfortunately, even if she were to be visited by three ghosts, she wouldn't get it.
(((hugs)))lol Ivorwen that is too true. even the ghosts would be like forget you!
CW...take a deep breath, grab an nice warm cup of joe or whatever it is that you like in the morning and just breath. Family when stretched miles apart is extremely hard to deal with when each wants their own time with the parents etc.
Yes, they are being unreasonable and I have a similar situation here only it is a little reversed. We all deal with it and it isn't in your best interest to get this stressed out. Your back will flare up again and that won't help with the Christmas shopping or the cleaning.
If talking about it won't help, smile and say in your best southern voice, "that's nice" it means FU.
>
<ooooo I can say "that's nice" hehehehe of course the whole kill 'em kindness has been shot down because of her. lmao at least now I have a reason NOT to go over there when my husband wants to though I do enjoy seeing my nieces.
yea I definitely need coffee...been up since 5 this morning and didn't go to bed until 11 last night...
I'll try Lynne to calm down and breath...it's hard though. And what really makes it hurt more is that they don't even give a damn that I have lost someone. and if I had done that to them they would be having a hissy fit.
but like people say you can't make everyone happy.
Yo BG...*clears throat and smiles sickley sweet* thats nice.
how was that lynne?hmm I'll have to practice my sweet smile...I'm rusty..it would probably be the FU look
Crazdwriter, I feel for you hun! Its to bad there is no hugging smiley, I would give you loads of em
. Family can really ruin christmas 
. Personally after last christmas I have told Clive I don't want to go anywhere, just stay home and have a quiet day for christmas. Loads of laying in and decent movies, maybe some nice traditional christmas dinner, sushi! (had that with a friend of ours a few years back when we couldn't travel and our friend was going to be alone for the holiday).
I hope that you and your mother in law really hit it off and that it makes up for this headache. It does go against stereotypes to like your mother in law but it does happen. I won the jackpot with mine, she is better family then my blood family. Perhaps finding a good friend in your mother in law will be the best present this year.I'm sorry you have to deal with family like that too Kristen. but hey sushi with friends sounds way better
God its way better! The holidays are supposed to be about sharing joy with people you love, sadly those people are not always our relatives! and that sure messes just about everything up. My family is on the other side of the planet and in some ways that is a blessing, I get a call and they pass me around and then its over. My mother in law is great but Clive does not get on well with his brother at all and does not know how to keep his mouth shut which leads to a mess of drama. I like his brother ok, we just have different values and Gary (brother in law) his wife n kids and I avoid those issues and try to have fun but Clive does not respect Garys values and its to much to get in the middle of that mess so I said no visit this year. Last year they told Clive he was no longer welcome there, that I would always be welcome but not Clive! We could start a holiday type soap opera here couldn't we? I mean my family on the other side of the globe has problems, dad took out a restraining order on his sisters and his only family so is probably going to be lonely this christmas and my husband can't get on with his brother and you got drama with your family, we got the workings of a good soap
Let's start writing the screen play now
Good I got a laugh outa ya!
Now what are we going to call our soap? Something to do with in-laws seems appropriate..... How about 'The in-laws of our lives'
'As the Parents-in-Law turn'
hey crazd, sorry to hear the immaturity of your sister-in-law.
I so agree with scottlifes advice, definitely take the high road and remember how papa would want to see you... your 'sis' in law wants you to cave in and get upset thus the petty facebook status.
take some deep breaths, a morning walk and clear your mind.
if you don't want to delete her, just remove her postings from your news feed. she won't know it and will waste her time continuing to post her status and you won't even see it!!!! ha.
good luck~ one day at a time girl.Thanks rebekah...I would so love to take a walk but don't feel like walking in the rain. YAY WE'RE GETTING RAIN FINALLY!
But yes I am going to ignore her and her husband's pittiful childish ways and be more mature about it. I just needed to vent and it get it off my head before I explode!
ewwww I love all animals don't get me wrong but those things...LMAO
OH guess what I saw yesterday?
A dog breed called Taco TerrierI love animals too but I think those dogs look sickly, selective breeding so that we can have 'toy' animals seems cruel to me
I love a good sloppy mut! The funniest and friendlies dog I ever had was a pure bread mut
I miss that dog, we called him thelonious after thelonious monk but his nick name was felonious for stealing our socks! And getting into more mud n parasitic bugs like ticks uck! He was a good bad doggieHAHA stole your socks. My dog would steal my mom and dads socks hehe...now I have a kitten who steals my bras
I am not allowed pets where I live
But there is this neighborhood cat who visits just about every house on the street and steals all our food! She is a FAT KITTY! (I have seen bigger but Its fun to tease her)
Bred by a gentleman named Bell?
I'll bring the popcorn and soda
I'm not sure if my parents love me or somehow I made them mad!
LMAO you never know Denno. It was cute though but...I think I'll stick with the huskies and the golden retrievers, maybe a little lady like lady and the tramp
Oh and a comfort retriever. THEY ARE SOOOO CUTE!!!! it's a mix of a goldern retirever and cocker spaniel. OMG Denno the face!Crazedwriter I hope we got you cheered up a bit n giggling about cute furry animal friends n such. I am shattered and ready to eat dinner n go to bed. Had to hobble to the doctors office today for a sick note for work, she had one look at my ankle and said 'that wont be healed in a week better give you a note for 2 weeks' of course thats when the school breaks up for the holidays
but hey thats more time for hubbin! I hope you have a great evening or day if thats what it is in your part of the world I don't remember you telling me about a story to check out before but I had a look round your hubs n found one I suspected was the one you were talking about and left a comment. Hope I found the right one
Thanks UW, MM, and Steven...I am going to ignore them or at least do what lynne said earlier, smile and say "that's nice." a nicer way of saying FU
But what really gets to me is the fact that they obviously don't care that they are putting MIL in the middle and adding to her stress. Or care that I am still dealing with a loss in the family. Eh I say screw 'em. they want to be jerks then that is them. Sad thing is BIL doesn't act this way it's all HER!Hey Crazd, I'm showing up late because I'm working a lot of hours right now. 70 hrs last week. I've had to go through this crap too, and finally I got my head on straight and decided the following:
1. Live by this motto: "What others think of me is none of my business." So what if they bad-mouth you. You don't have to live up to any of it, and when you hear it, it just brings you down. Let them bitch about you, but you don't have to respond in kind. That only puts you on their level. And if she's a bitch, she'll continue to prove it over and over, so there's no argument there. You can be at peace because you know that you are doing what you believe you should, and sticking to your values and principles. You are accomodating everyone the best you can, and if that's not enough for your sister-in-law, that's just her drama, not yours.
2. Play dumb. Really. When all my family turned against me through two divorces, when I lost my kids for four long years before they came back to me, I kept playing dumb about all the gossip and drama. I kept my mouth shut and when I got stood up by my kids for vacations and everything else, I forgave them and kept telling them I loved them. When they tried to hurt me saying terrible things, I laughed instead of cried. I just said, "Wow, that sounds way too dramatic for me. Glad that's your drama, not mine." It hurt like hell, but eventually it got better. Real friends and family returned after big losses, but most of all I have wonderful, non-toxic people in my life now. So when drama hits the fan, stupid things are posted on FB, laugh it off. She is already haunted with her own demons and she is the one who is obviously miserable. Why do you have to go there with her?
Just hoping that after the loss of your Pappa that you can keep things in perspective about what the drama really is. It's petty and unimportant. You have the right to make the best of your time with your mom-in-law, and you don't have to listen to the background noise.
Sending good vibes, amiga.yea we are allowed to go over to their house now but knowing me I'll be fake fake fake!
i'll pretend to be all happy for my nieces but that's about it...they won't even know it but hey it's all good.
Good thanks, hoping your Christmas is a little more stress free from here-on in.
I took care of these sort of problems years ago, I disowned my entire family, I recommend it.
When my kids' two paternal grandparents were still alive we had a similar thing. My sister-in-law "couldn't travel" (because her little kids were essentially out-of-control and ran the whole show). As a result, the sister-in-law and family never came to see us. The only time they "could" see us when I'd bring ALL THREE of my kids (who "happened to be" kids you could travel with
) to see their grandparents (and then the sister-in-law, her husband, and their out-of-control kids could get to Grandma's, because they didn't live far from her). This, of course, meant that for just about every dinner there would be (I'm not exaggerating here) a four-hour debate about what we'd "all" do for dinner (and with 5 adults and 5 children, some people's dietary restrictions and other people's vegetarianism; along with the fact that few involved had anything close to similar tastes in food - most of our visits were all about the dinner debate and her out-of-control kids turning things to havoc.)
Still, the fact was her kids were horrible. It wasn't her fault that she didn't know how to have well behaved kids; and the only way our kids would get to know their aunt, uncle, and cousins was if they spent time when we happened to go visit Grandma. We just accepted whoever had which kind of kids, who had which money to travel, and the fact that things were what they were. Not to be a big downer here, but the aggravations of differences among family members aren't worth being upset over. In my family, today "Grandma" and "Grandpa" are long gone; and horribly, so is one of my sister-in-law's children. We were there on one of the crazy visits on a Saturday (he was toddler), and by the following Wednesday he was gone. I don't want to sound like I'm trying to be "wise, old, crone" (or whatever); but - really - most people (and their relatives) do the best they can, and nobody's perfect anyway. I think you just have to go with "what is" and be glad you all have one another. Sometimes if people are struggling with money they either can't save anything, or else have to use what the manage to save to do something like pay bills or buy put Christmas together for their kids. If I were in that situation and someone arranged that my parents could come within visiting range, I'd be happy, grateful, and probably do just what your relatives are planning to do.Seriously, I'd tell them to naff off. And I'd have said that before the childish, snipey FB message. The minute I saw that I'd have then said 'and that just shows why we're going to have a merrier Christmas without you'.
Family ties don't have to include false niceties simply to keep the peace. Because if the wife's as you say and your brother-in-law is how he is, what peace are you keeping?
You're just papering over the cracks. Seems to me they're going to call you black what ever you do.
Don't sweat family crap, have the Christmas that suits your little brood. Shoulder in and ignore the Munsters.
Whatever happens, enjoy as best you can the coming festivities. It's about your needs too.
I spent far too many years (39 out of 41) trying to bend and bow to suit several members of my family. I'm so glad I finally found the balls to say 'enough'. And you know what? They still piss and moan about me with wild abandon - and it's no worse simply because I refused to deal with 'it' anymore.
But the real crux of the matter is ... I'm so much the happier for it
I'm sure you'll manage, whatever happens - merry Christmas to the household. Just get drunk on sherryI missed the FB message.
Too late now, I guess.
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