What are the 10 ways that having a relationship in one teens is a mistake and unwise?
I remember having a discussion with my father at 15 regarding dating. My father was of the opinion that the teen years were WAY TOO YOUNG to either date or be in a relationship. He believed that the teen years should be spent concentrating on furthering one's education and career prospects.He even stated that no one should date until he/she is established.In high school, a former classmate of mine,an honor student, indicated that dating should occur from the period of 19-25; of course,many thought that she was strange.
My father was right in his assessment-the teens are TOO YOUNG to date.
I don't agree with your father, sorry. I don't think there's anything wrong with dating in our teens - we're genetically programmed to look for a mate in our early to mid teens, so it's perfectly natural. I had my first boyfriend when I was 16, and I was with him for two years. I can see nothing bad in it - he didn't prevent me from continuing with my education, and I was still able to finish high school and go on to university and obtain a degree.
From seeing other people who have been oppressed by their parents, and comparing those people to myself and those who had a more liberal upbringing, I can only conclude that being allowed a certain degree of freedom to make one's own choices is by far the healthier option. In our teens we are learning how to make our own decisions, because we are old enough to do this. And making mistakes is how we learn - dating different people is how we find out what kind of person we are compatible with. Dating in our teens allows us to practise getting to know people on a more intimate level. When we oppress this natural instinct, and wait until we are in our 20s to date, then it becomes more difficult, and a more nerve-wracking experience.
My answer is just based on my experience and what I have observed in others.
The teen years should be spent pursuing educational and career goals. Teenagers are TOO YOUNG to be dating and involved in relationships. I feel that dating and relationships should be explored in one's 20s when one is hopefully mature enough.
I don't think teens should not date entirely ie (go to school dances, matinee movies, or attend other school functions such as athletic events). Back in my day I can remember going to "sock hops" and formal dances like the "Sweetheart's Ball" at age 16. A parent would drop off the teens and they'd call them to pick them up.
Without those types of experiences I think one would be socially at a disadvantage when it comes to dating later on in life. There are people in their 30s who are still uncomfortable with the opposite sex due to lack of dating experience in their youth.
Having said that the biggest fear for any parent is to have their child get into a "serious relationship". Parents would rather have their child go out with multiple kids or in group date settings. Spending too much time (one on one) often has teens emulating marriage in their minds. More often than not they will engage in sexual activity of some type especially if they believe they are "in love". Another fear is not only sexual activity but teen pregnancy. Last but not least there is the fear that a "serious relationship" will derail a child's career prospects and opportunities. Imagine having a daughter who gets accepted to Harvard and she refuses to go because she doesn't want to be away from her boyfriend who will be attending community college. In other instances they (the teens) decide they want to just get jobs and move in together after high school and simply forgo college altogether. They naturally don't think about long-term consequences.
Part of being a parent is "planting seeds" of a possible future and what a "successful life" could look like for a teenager. If possible it's a good ideal to take them to a large college campus to walk around or drive through neighborhoods of very successful people periodically. If those thoughts take hold in their mind it will be more difficult for them to risk giving up a bright future.
Great answer as always, Dashing. Teenagers are too young to be involved in relationships. I have seen the down side of teen dating. I believe that NO ONE should date until they're at least 21. The voice of my father resonates in me. He was RIGHT!
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