Is a mother capable of taking care of her new born and her first child of a year old and seven month
She has a week old baby and insists on taking care of her fist child do you think it is a good for her mentally to have take care of both her children and especially with a newly born?
Hi DDE, I had two children within one year of each other. I had no support system. No family that was willing to help. I also had no car. So I took care of both of my children by myself. My ex was gone most of the time during the day into late hours at night.
However, I would have loved to have a mother or supportive mother-in-law to help. It is most beneficial to have a support network in families.
It gives the children a feeling of security and people in their life they come to trust. It also gives the mom a well-needed break and rest.
They're her children and unless she's neglecting or abusing them, of course she's capable of taking care of them. Mentally, any mother of any number of children of any age range can have a hard time coping even with help around. Whether this woman's children are their current age or if they were teenagers, there are going to be rough patches. Women have been raising kids with and without help from other people since the beginning of time, why do so many people worry about it now? If you or someone else notices her "stressing out" offer to give her a hand. If you won't do that or if she refuses help, my advice is to stop worrying about it and butt out.
It's absolutely possible, though I'm certain that any support or help would be appreciated, especially if they're her first two kids. I have two kids that are a little closer together than that, and managed to take care of them just fine by myself. It was tough, but most mothers know how to push and sacrifice when their children need them. For me, it was also a plus that they were my second and third children -- my oldest is 5 years older than the middle child. Not only did the oldest give me a good foundation for what to expect, he was able to do a lot of things by himself by time they were born (i.e. go to the bathroom, get himself dressed, get in the car, comprehend instructions), so the workload stayed relatively manageable.
As for good mentally...it's never good mentally for someone to be without help and a support system. She may have some issues, especially if she has postpartum depression. It's not a total mental killer, and doesn't mean she can't take care of them, but it's extremely taxing. When I was at that point, I felt like I would give my entire world just for someone to watch the kids long enough for me to take a nap and a shower. If she turns down help, I'd take that as a sign that she doesn't feel in need of it right now, so no issue.
Definitely, I also think it is good for the older child to be involved with the new child. If friends or family have any doubt, they should be there to support her when or if she needs a break. Women are the some of the most amazing and resilient creatures.
My answer is yes she is able to take care of a newborn and a child that is a year and seven months old but that would be very hard on her to do. Emotionally and physically this would take a toll on both mother and both children. One would hope that she would get the maximum support and help from her husband.
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