What would you do if a person came to your door and said Hi I am your son?
I'm pretty sure my hubby doesn't have any children we don't know about - but if for some reason that DID happen - I would be excited!
I know, we already have 8 children, but I love kids and family - and just think, if someone comes seeking you out they probably have questions & I'm sure they are going through a lot of anxiety over how they will be recieved.
I would wrap him/her up in a BIG hug - DNA papers or not and welcome them to the family. I would allow them to ask questions, introduce them to everyone - and I do mean everyone in the family. There are so many years that would have been missed! and my extended family is just a great big group of teddy bears who love to love & adore reasons to get together and celebrate.
I'm sure it would be a shock for my hubby - but, you can get over shock. The important thing is - this kid wants & needs love and acceptance.
Hi Mom Kat, You anwswed the question exactly like I did when it happened to me. The man, now 33 years old said to Me at my front door (Mark) I guess you knoew who I am? I had parential suit when I was 19 years old and after 1 year all charges were dropped. All thos e years later this happened and when I said him he looked like my son I have with my life. I almost cryed. I said we have to get a DNA to see if I am the tru father only because the case was dropped years ago. He was so happy. We took the test and it came back at 99.999% positive. I was happy but upset too. Here the was a boy with no father for 33 years and I didn't have my life with him as a father to raise him. He has done very well for himself and we see him and talk on phone often . His family is great and I now have a second grandson. God works in masteriuos ways don't you think. I just felt robbed from not being able to have a son and missed out on 33 years of his life.
I would find it very interesting, to say the least, considering my past history and sexual partners. Therefore, in my case, it would be highly unlikely.
Since I've suffered no nine-month-long blackouts over my life, I'd know better; however, if I could put myself in a guy's shoes...
I'd expect this young man to give me information that proved he was who he said he was; and tell him I hoped he understood that it was the only sensible thing to do (and that it wasn't necessarily a matter of my not believing him). I'd probably want to have a conversation with him about what kind of relationship (if any) he hoped to have with me; and I'd talk about any factors in my life or personality that may be obstacles or reasons I could/couldn't offer the kind of relationship he wanted. If he said he just wanted to get information about his background or just meet me, I'd probably go with that. If he was looking for a father figure I don't think I could refuse to try to build that kind of relationship.
This is coming from a woman (and mother's) thinking, but I think I'd be generally happy to discover I had this child. I'd also feel a deep sense of responsibility in trying to do what was best for him. I may be worried about what kind of person he is, though, particularly if I had other children who were younger than he. I think it can be pretty difficult to "overcome" the bond we have with the children we're raised and not think first about whether someone/something may harm them, or affect their lives seriously negatively.
Yes my children I have with my wife kind of took it hard and they felt treatened I guess after the DNA came out 99.999% positive. They now are getting used to it and are quite happy they have a new brother and a new family from him. I wrote about this in on of my hubs too. So we are just taking it slow and getting to know each other and our families.
sounds really strange.. I just would be stunned for a moment but recovering I would let him know that my husband doesn't make mistakes like that!!
I hope this is only hypothetical..!!
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