Are you torn between the need to write personal poetry and stories....
- ahorsebackposted 13 years ago
0I'm not famous, but I'm not even in any conflict over it. I would very much love to really write what I need to write, but I know there's no way I would ever do that - not even under a fake name or under the guise of "fiction" (which would have to be suspiciously similar to everything in my real life
).
So, when I'm not writing stuff that isn't personal at all; and when I'm writing what I think of as "personal" stuff, I'll "hint" at the real stuff when I write, but that leaves me exhausted because of how much writing it takes and how much effort it takes to tell the story without just saying what I need to say.
I'm discovering, though, that trying to "sort of hint" and "sort of tell a story" is like opening a "brain valve" and having real trouble shutting it again. I almost think it's better just to keep that brain valve closed forever and let it rust shut. The trouble is, if you try to do that the pressure builds up and a lot of words start shooting out with a lot of force. My thing isn't so much a matter of being torn, as it is a matter of being exhausted trying to manage how much and how long I let that brain valve be open. Another problem is that once I've let a bunch of words come rushing out and filling pages, I still haven't emptied out the thoughts that need to come out; and all I end up with is a big, mess, of half-baked writing that didn't do what I needed it to do.
- ralwusposted 13 years ago0
ralwus, I can write really honestly about how I feel if it only involves me and my feelings. Where I wish I could be more honest is when other people are the ones I'd like to write about.
In all seriousness, I just can't risk hurting people or ending relationships over some of the stuff I feel. I guess my thing is that my gripes are about other people. When I'm not worried about their feelings I'm not able to risk letting "some people" know they've managed to apparent aim to get the best of me. I've actually considered seeking a counselor to "vent on", but the Catch 22 of the need to write is really also the need to let those people see how I feel (which, of course, would mean putting it on the Internet ). That's why a counselor wouldn't end the need to just make things public, and it's why writing in a "secret notebook" wouldn't do it either.
- ralwusposted 13 years ago0
Oh, I know. I can't believe I'm being quite this candid (but again, I have no problem being brutally honest about just my own feelings), but I'm pretty much nowhere near the same person I "really am" or once was. I'm just like one, big, vial of hidden vitriol; packaged in a reasonably pleasant persona.
I can just imagine the heart disease building up as we speak. (I don't really think it's funny either, although it's so extreme and so against my real nature, it just does strike me funny.)
I've actually (and often) considered writing under a completely different name, not linking to anything else, etc. etc., and just saying what I need to say; but, you know what? I'm so frozen into keeping it all "a big, secret" I can't even imagine doing that. How stupid is that!...that's for sure. At this point, my thing is (whether in writing or in person) I can't even really contain it. I mean, someone will say, "Nice day," and whatever I answer back seems to contain some crap-related thread that has nothing to do with "Nice day".
.
- ralwusposted 13 years ago0
I'm not famous either, nor am I torn. I think my life has been very boring, therefore nobody will be interested in reading it anyway. It works well when it's time to release the inner self through writing.
Related Discussions
- 150
Are you a writer who reads or a writer who doesn't read?
Are you a writer who reads or a writer who doesn't read?Almost every article on how to become a good writer emphasizes the necessity to read, read, read. I am not a reader per se; I can't sit down with a novel and almost never read purely for enjoyment. I get all of my information from...
- 10
Multiple accounts here?
Do any of you have multiple accounts on HubPages? If so, are you willing to share tips on how that best works, and whether it's been beneficial? Or the reasons you created more than one account? Thanks!
- 13
How many Hubs do You need to write so Hubpages gives you traffic? 100-200- 1000?
How many Hubs do You need to write so Hubpages gives you traffic? 100-200- 1000?Is it the number of years you are on Hubpages to get traffic from Google or is it the number of Hubs you write?
- 23
How are you promoting your poetry and fiction writing?
How are you promoting your poetry and fiction writing now that Hubpages is putting most of it on idle?
- 35
Writing about personal subjects
Have you had some experiences in your life you would like to write about, but you feel that they are just too personal? By that I mean they would be too embarassing or they would hurt someone close to you. If you were guaranteed total anonymity, would you write about them?
- 37
How the hell do they create some many hubs?
I see people already creating more tan 80 hubs over 3 weeks, when i barely able to do 10 hubs...How do they do it?