Is my Long distance relationship loosing interest?

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   RangerTexasposted 12 years ago

   Im currently in a 2 year LDR, which we met through online, we started just messaging and chatting every night.
   We started to feel feelings for each other, so we talk sometimes during the day and night. She occasionally call or text me love notes( which i miss alot).
   She lives in another country and I took a risk and flew to visit her and her family.
   After I trully fell in love with her and I promised my complete soul and heart to her.
   I always tell her every time we talk that i support her and love her, I only give positive feeds.I like giving develiver flowers to her house that i buy in the internet. I like to make her feel special and that im thinking of her. Im a person with a sense of humor and i like making her laugh. But recently months ago she has been real busy and has had problems with her family and she hasnt call me no more or text, she was acting different so I became worried so I got a little jealous. We encounter a problem in our relationship and she got mad, but i admit my jealousy and ive told her i will trust her completely.
   But this month she has being more busy at her job and stop talking to me about one week and half, She has told me that she loves me, Should i be worried ? Is she becoming distant?

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      Disturbiaposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, the answer is yes.  You already know this.  If you think you have a problem, you probably do.

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         RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         any advice that i should do?

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            Greek Oneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Move On

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      imagine.charposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      In fairness, you've done what you should do with a LDR, sending flowers, go and visit her and chat to her on an often basis.
      Sometimes a girl just needs to be held and kissed and receive loads of affection which a LDR can't give. You need to evaluate this relationship and decide whether you want to be with her or not. You need to meet up with her and seriously discuss your future because it's not a relationship without trust and yes you say you trust her...but do you really trust her?
      I wouldn't trust anyone in a LDR because it gets boring, it gets loveless and sometimes texting and chatting all the time can be too much for someone along with the long distance. All these factors can mix together and result in what is happening now.
      She could have even met someone else who provides her with what she wants but doesn't want to break your heart so she's quietening down with you. She's giving you space to try and help you realise what you are without her.
      
      I don't mean to upset you with what I've said but I just feel that you should everyone's opinions.
      Do what's best for you - find someone closer to home and move forward OR remain in the LDR and continue forward but no matter what you do you have got you move forward. It's up to you what path you choose.

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         RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         yes i tried to be that guy with show my true what i feel, given her affection and notice her all the time....(i actually do trust her) im that type of guy that never gives up at anything and would go to the end of the world for love....
         But i do have a dignity if she feels not interest me no more... i move on... if she found someone else i want her to feel happy no matter with who it is..
         I had options to go out in these past 2 yrs. but im like that loyal dog that would bark but would not bite (cheat).
         
         your comment make me more confident and thinking
         if she not interest on me i not worried because she is the one that is loosing a nice guy.
         
         thanks for the advice  imagine.char

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            imagine.charposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            :] As long as you remember yourself in these situations then its fine to worry about what she is doing.
            She looks after herself, and you need to think about yourself too. Its okay to be a little selfish now and then :p but you need to think to the future because LDR can be hard work - as you can see - but also they can be educational.
            Just stay true to yourself and talk to her. Tell her to be honest with you and reassure her that no matter what you'll always care for her :]
            you can add my page as a friend if you like :] any advice you need - just ask!

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      ForYourInfoposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Do net get frustrated....visit her once in a month & I think all will be good for both of you to sustain your relationship.

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         RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         not that easy with my graduate schooling and her job and plus she lives in another country
         and super expensive to travel once a month....

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   SandyMcCollumposted 12 years ago

   Yep, sounds like she's losing interest, alright. Sorry guy, have you asked her if she's losing interest? Any what does she say is the reason for her distance?

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      RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      she has told me that she been super busy at work and tired, but I know she loves me, and i had told her that im planning to visit her but I confused with her thinking???

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   Stevennix2001posted 12 years ago

   This is a rather difficult question to answer, as I don't know the full details of your relationship.  However, I do know this.  I too have had a lot of long distance relationships in the past.  One where I even met the girl that i was talking to in person, and others where I never did.  The problem with long distance relationships though is they're often risky, and the probability of success is always against you.  Why?  Because people do lose interest the longer the relationship carries on being long distance, and there's always the possibility that the person you're in love with could end up falling for someone that's closer to where they live.
   
   I can't tell you what you should or shouldn't do, but I will say this.  What do you want?  If you truly love this girl and want to be with her, then I'd probably wait it out for about a month or so.  Just be supportive to her and if you can, you should try to save up money again to visit her like you did before.  Maybe seeing her in person again might rekindle your romance back.  However, if that doesn't work, or if she continues to not answer your texts or e-mails after a few months, then I would probably leave her.  As all likely hood is that she's probably moved on and figured your relationship with her will never be anything more than what it is. 
   
   That's part of the problem with long distance relationships.  They can only stay long distance for so long, until eventually one of the parties or both will yearn for it to be more.  And if it doesn't become more than that, then sadly the relationship always ends up in failure usually.  I'm not saying yours will, as only you can answer that.  However, i do hope things work out for you.

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      RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      thanks man.... good info...
      i know the odds of success of LDR
      but i do trully love her and willing to wait and i had tried to visit her in past months but her job keeps her real busy and my graduate schooling keeps me also....
      But problem with me i get discourage real easy !! ;(

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         Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Wait a second, did i misread your op? I thought it said you did meet her once in real life? Or did i read that wrong?

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            RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            i visit her about a year ago.... visit her family and got along pretty well
            we made plans for the future but Im confuse now...
            to the point im lookng answers or advice in the web....

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               Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

               i see...well in hindsight, then I would probably do as Sandy suggested.  Just give her an ultimatum to see what she does.  if she wants to work things out, or not break up with you, then you'll know that she still loves you, but just been very busy lately.  if she says that it might be best if you did break up, then it might be time to move on.

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                  RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

                  thanks man again for da advice...

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   SandyMcCollumposted 12 years ago

   Maybe give her the option to bow out. If she takes it, then you know she was losing interest. People in love don't ignore texts or emails OR phone calls. People in love don't choose to go for days without contact. People in love WANT to be together or at least in daily contact. Like it was for you and her before she started losing interest.
   
   That's just my opinion.

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      RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      When she works she leaves her country and work elsewhere.... so i cant call her or text her
      but we talk occasionally true messenger on nights
      but she has acted distant over the past months
      so im worried... should i be?

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   Stacie Lposted 12 years ago

   Long distance relationships requires great commitment of both parties and a lot of work. I was involved in a few and they are not workable for more than a year,IMO.
   It's not realistic when you do see them because you two have to re acquaint yourselves each time and be on your best behavior.

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      RangerTexasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      were close to 2 years..... we chat mostly all nights ... when she is not busy or im not busy.. most of the time we have a good chat... i have a sense of humor and she loves that!!!!
      but i realized the odds of keeping a LDR
      but i want to try my hardest to make it work...
      but how they say it requires two to tango....

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