Making A Marriage Work - Top Five Tips

1. 77

   frogdroppingposted 13 years ago

   Making A Marriage Work - Top Five Tips

   replyreport
2. 57

   dh43marriagemanposted 13 years ago

   The obvious cliche that works: "Never go to bed angry!"  While it seems cheesy, it works because you don't let problems build up till they are uncontrollable. 
   
   Compromise: You have to be willing to work with your partner.  It can't always be your way.  They will appreciate you for this.
   
   Forgiveness: No one is perfect and invariable your partner will do something that hurts you.  You have to be the bigger person and understand that they didn't try to intentional hurt you.
   
   Leave your family out of your marriage.  Families are great but, and have their place, but not for marriage advice.
   
   Have common goals and ambitions, if you aren't going the same place, you won't be together long.

   replyreport
3. 0

   Longhunterposted 13 years ago

   Establish a Date Night once a week. Ours is every Tuesday night. 2-1/2 year old stays with his grandparents. 20 year old stays with his mom. We may go out for dinner or stay in for dinner and a movie but it's time for just us.
   
   Another one would be if you're wrong, admit it, apologize, and do your best not to make the same mistake again. I learned this the hard way - going through a divorce. We both would not admit when we were wrong.
   
   Talk WITH each other. So many times I see a couple in a car where she's looking out the side window and he's staring straight ahead. Communicate.
   
   Hold hands. Sounds simple but it'll let your spouse/partner know you're open to talking. It also makes the kids feel good to see their parents being affectionate and all is right in their world.
   
   We all have hobbies. If you want to work on yours, make sure everything else is done so your spouse/partner can do theirs as well, resulting in no hard feelings.
   
   I'll add a sixth. Don't sweat the small stuff. Again, this one sounds simple also and it's not always easy to do. Just ask yourself is it worth arguing over? Is it worth hurting your relationship over? Probably not.
   
   These are just a few I've learned and now practice in my new marriage. Do they work? So far, yes.

   replyreport
4. 52

   EasyShakespeareposted 13 years ago

   Communicate.  If you're happy about something, speak up.  If something is bothering you, speak up.  Don't expect your spouse to be a mind reader.  Share your own thoughts and feelings and viewpoints in a non-confrontational manner.
   
   Love each other.  Physically, yes; but emotionally, too.  Always keep in mind what it was that brought the two of you together.  Hang on to it.  Whatever happens, remember that you're in it together.  Stay supportive of each other.  A problem shared is a problem halved.
   
   Be positive.  Don't let the turkeys get you down.  Remember that the glass is half full - not half empty.  Look forward, not back.  Remember the good things, discard the bad.  Learn from your mistakes, but don't dwell on them.
   
   Be your own family.  Don't allow either set of parental in-laws to call the shots.  Love them all, but keep them at a distance.  And make sure that you divide your time evenly between them all - assuming that they're not totally dysfunctional people who should be avoided at all costs.
   
   Put up with each other.  This last tip needs a little bit of explanation.  When my wife and I got married, we took our vows both in English and in Hungarian (her ethnic heritage).  I asked the minister of her Hungarian church to translate the vows I would be taking because I wanted to know exactly what I would be agreeing to.  Well, they had the whole "love, honor and cherish" language, but there was an extra little bit.  We both agreed to "put up with" each other. - That was the literal translation, "to put up with."  My wife and I were both struck with the honesty and integrity of that language.  As to the vow itself: the Hungarian version wasn't the typical "I do", it was "so help me God, I will try to do this."  We both loved the leeway inherent in that statement.  We were agreeing to give it our best shot, and as long as we did that, we were being true to our vows.  And, from time to time, one of us (out of the blue) will say, "Thanks for putting up with me," to which the other always replies, "Thanks for putting with me, too." - We're currently at 36 years and counting.

   replyreport
5. 60

   Purplepassion1posted 13 years ago

   Long, slow wet kisses.  Make time for each other.  Treat each other like a precious commodity.  Laugh and do not sweat the small stuff.

   replyreport
6. 0

   WildIrisposted 13 years ago

   I've been married for 27 years, so this is what has worked for us.
   
   1. Mutual respect + excellent communication.Practice fighting fair.
   2. Great sex
   3. A sense of humor
   4. Tolerance
   5. Forgiveness

   replyreport
7. 76

   cathylynn99posted 13 years ago

   start off by marrying the right person - someone generous, agreeable and reasonable whom you enjoy spending time with.
   
   i agree with everyone who says that communication is key.
   
   being affectionate, whatever that means to you, is helpful. find some way each day to let your spouse know you still care about them. my husband has coffee waiting for me when i get up ea. AM. this counts bigtime. you bet i always say thanks.
   
   trust your spouse and be trustworthy.
   
   take time for yourself and give your spouse their individual time, too.

   replyreport
8. 61

   ladyjojoposted 13 years ago

   #1. First you got to understand each other natures very well
   
   #2. Having understanding and tell each other about your likes and dislikes, don't hide when you are hurt etc. Be willing to gave in sometimes.
   
   #3. Don't be selfish make time for each other just as you use to when you were courting, share ideas,love etc.
   
   #4. Always remember marrying is for happiness but it won't always be a bell of roses " For better or for Worse" a lot of people run when the worst part comes along. Remember the vows you said I do to. In life we will always have some rift and most of all nobody is perfect there will be times you offend each other.
   
   #5. Help out with the house work, make time for a little date or outing with the children always try to keep happy.

   replyreport
9. 61

   fdoleacposted 13 years ago

   learn to "let it go" when the confrontation doesn't make sense.  If it is the norm, then counseling make be in order.  Communication is the key.

   replyreport
10. 56

    dawnMposted 13 years ago

    great sex...lol had to put that first, because most couple who want to have a great marriage usually dont even put that in.
    
    1.communication
    2.respect
    3.great sexual passion for each other
    4.laughing together
    5. understanding the role of male and female
    
    all the rest is gravy

    replyreport