How to say "NO"?? I feel very difficult to say NO to my friends, can you suggest

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   jamesroy11143posted 13 years ago

   How to say "NO"?? I feel very difficult to say NO to my friends, can you suggest me tips
   
   

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   Taleb80posted 13 years ago

   My dear friend, I know you would like to see me happy, so you 're my friend.
   As my pleasure,please, let me now (for example: finish my Job, task, help my father, taking a rest, etc).
   I appreciate your understanding.

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   Mandeeadairposted 13 years ago

   Sounds like a question I would ask.  !  I think the biggest fear about saying no to your friends is losing their acceptance or desire to be around you.  If they have a problem with you telling them no, is it really a friendship you want to continue?  I think boundaries are such an important part of any friendship...saying no to something you don't want to do is respectable and should be completely acceptable to your friends.  I do try to say yes when I can, especially if it is a favor that I know they need help with (they will return it), but if you feel taken advantage of, or just plain having problems saying no to something you aren't comfortable doing then you need to practice saying no....its going to end up gaining you respect from your real friends and maybe weeding out the friends that are your friends for the wrong reasons.  Good luck !
   
   http://hubpages.com/hub/Letting-Go-of-N … Frienships

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   yazoogal43posted 13 years ago

   I have the same problem, but when you realize a true friend will not take advantage of you, it's not as hard. Saying no is your right and you have to or else you will get the reputation . of being a pushover. Don't let p peopleborrow and never ever loan money because you won't get it back and that means family also. Start asking 'friend's'  to do things they dont want to and see how quickly the situation reverses.

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   VeganLoveposted 13 years ago

   Come up with excuses so you don't have to directly say NO!!! After saying no indirectly you will begin to find "No" easier to flat out say. I used to have the same problem.

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   Klenaposted 13 years ago

   Can you provide any further information on what kinds of things you have difficulty saying "no" to?
   
   My mother always said "never a borrower nor a lender be" when friends have asked for money. Sometimes I've had an issue saying no to my friends, however close friends are reliable enough to pay you back promptly.
   
   Is it social events that are a problem? Are you an agony aunt for them? Do they ask you for money? I'll give any help I can with some more information

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   MickSposted 13 years ago

   Just say no, do not beat around the bush, and do not get involved with justifying your refusal.  If your friends don't accept it, they are not friends.

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   Butch Newsposted 13 years ago

   You need to remember your best friend is you.  If you are giving in to others then you have low self esteem.  It's hard but you have to learn to stand up for your own feelings.
   
   If people are trying to make you do things you don't want to do they aren't really your friends at all.  Not even a little bit.
   
   Time to make some cuts in your team of friends.  Just walk away.  Be blunt and tell them you aren't comfortable with what they want from you and they will have to accept that or you won't be returning calls.

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   Mayaanjaliposted 13 years ago

   Always buy time whatever the situation is- " Wait a second, let me not commit myself right now and say a yes cos' I know there might be repercursions that may arise if I affirm right now that may make this situation ugly for me later"
   Give me time and I will give u my answer in a day or two.

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    phiphiposted 13 years ago

    Are you overscheduled and overstressed? With today’s busy schedules, you’re not alone. One way to pare down your schedule is to get good at saying no to new commitments. Whether you say "yes" instead of no out of guilt, inner conflict, or a misguided notion that you can "do it all," learning to say no to more requests can be one of the biggest favors you can do yourself and those you love. It helps reduce stress levels and gives you time for what’s really important.
    
    1 Just say, “I’m sorry. I can't do this right now.” Use a sympathetic, but firm tone. If pressured as to why, reply that it doesn’t fit with your schedule, and change the subject. Most reasonable people will accept this as an answer, so if someone keeps pressuring you, they’re being rude, and it’s OK to just repeat, “I’m sorry, but this just doesn’t fit with my schedule," and change the subject, or even walk away if you have to.
    
    2 If you’re uncomfortable being so firm, or are dealing with pushy people, it’s OK to say, “Let me think about it and get back to you.” This gives you a chance to review your schedule, as well as your feelings about saying "yes" to another commitment, do a cost-benefit analysis, and then get back to them with a yes or no. Most importantly, this tactic helps you avoid letting yourself be pressured into overscheduling your life and taking on too much stress.
    
    3 If you would really like to do what they’re requesting, but don’t have the time (or are having trouble accepting that you don’t), it’s fine to say, “I can’t do this, but I can…” and mention a lesser commitment that you can make. This way you’ll still be partially involved, but it will be on your own terms.

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    Drew niteposted 13 years ago

    I had a friend that found it difficult to have certain conversation with her friends that maybe confrontational. She found it best to write it down and give it to them. It works for her, so I suggest that you write it down.

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