How do you feel about people that insist on pretending that they are someone, ot

1. 60

   Princess Priscaposted 12 years ago

   How do you feel about people that insist on pretending that they are someone, other than themselves?
   
   I am a frim believer in: 'Unto thine own self, be true...'  How do you feel about people that insist on pretending that they are someone, other than themselves?
   
   

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2. 72

   SidKempposted 12 years ago

   I understand why people do it: It can be so scary to put ourselves out there, and then not be met or understood. Also, some people truly don't know who they are: They're only aware of who they've learned to be.
   
   But it is sad. Everyone, in themselves, is such a unique and beautiful person. I hope we all learn to let that shine forth!

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3. 92

   MsDoraposted 12 years ago

   They may need help to deal with the negative experiences in their past which prevent them from dealing with who they are.

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4. 73

   lburmasterposted 12 years ago

   1. I would wonder about their age.
   2. Alter egos are ok for individuals to have. However, it would depend on how close they are and the relationship between them and their alter ego.
   3. They should be checked out by a psychologist to see what issues they have with their original self.

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5. 80

   Catherine Kaneposted 12 years ago

   It depends.
   
   One great way  to grow and achieve your goals as a human being is to "act as if" you already are that person. For instance, if you'd like to become more confident, you ask yourself "how would a confident person act?" and then do those things.
   
   By doing this, you eventually achieve that goal and become that new you
   
   A person doing such things could be perceived as pretending they are someone other than  who they are, but it'd be fine.

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      SidKempposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      In this case, I would say the person is acting as if they truly are who they already are inside - the wonder waiting to come out!

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      Catherine Kaneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      love that Sid

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6. 62

   MilesArmbrusterposted 12 years ago

   Generally my primary feeling for people like this is pity, or sympathy. I feel sad for people who are so lacking in confidence that they hide behind a false personna. People like this I want to encourage and help them to find an honest confidence and direction that will free them from their fears.
   At the same time, sometimes I get angry, because some of the nastiest, most judgmental people I know put out so much effort to "appear" nice and pious. This kind of hypocrisy bugs me.

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      SidKempposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for your honesty, Miles. Your entry is what this thread is all about!

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7. 68

   raquelpierposted 12 years ago

   It is so rare that anyone is who they profess or claim to be...and even when and if they are, often they are not accepted-hence the reason so few are who they say they are!
   I’ll be 42 years old soon and it is only recently that I figured out who that is-I don’t think I was ‘pretending’ so much as ‘playing it by ear’ though. I used to have no tolerance or patience for people that acted ‘accordingly’ dependent upon the company he or she was in or who was around.
   Love me or hate me-I am essentially the same person I have always been, as to whether that is a good thing or bad thing is debatable. There is one thing that changes about me and can change at any given time, and that is my willingness to learn and grow and respect others as they are, for who they are. Unfortunately, we may only know that about a person, which they are willing to reveal-or in many instances, that which they are or were pretending to be.

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8. 67

   libby1970posted 12 years ago

   That sort of behavior is completely immature! I can see a child playing "dress up" or "teacher" but an adult should be who they are--themself!
   
   Someone who wants to be someone else surely has some underlying issues with their self image. I am proud of who I am and wouldn't want to be anyone else...not even a famous person! Famous people aren't any better off than the average folk...they have a whole list of issues of their own--one is not being able to keep a steady relationship! No thanks! I'll take being me any day!
   
   A person should first learn to love themself then move on to love others! You have to look at a person and wonder what is really going on when they can't be themself!

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      Catherine Kaneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Actually, it can be kinda fun to pretend to be someone else part of the time.
      
      And it doesn't have to mean that you're not proud of yourself. I'm fine with myself and know who I am, but I also spend part of my time working at renaissance faires....

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   2. 72

      SidKempposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Catherine - thanks for adding the idea of pretending for fun. But, when we do that, are we really doing what Princess Prisca was talking about, "insist[ing] on" pretending. At a Renaissance Fair, are you exploring a part of who you truly are?

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      Catherine Kaneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      SidKemp, I think it's all about exploring different parts of myself, and who I might choose to become. To do that, sometimes I'll play with what it might be like to be someone else...

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   edhanposted 12 years ago

   People who do it because they are lack of confidence.
   
   They will hide behind a mask as they feel inferior to others. This should not be the way as we are all unique in our own ways. It is just a matter of discovering our TRUE SELF.
   
   I face myself through all challenges in life. I believe I am what I am. So why should I hide behind others.

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      Catherine Kaneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      But it doesn't have to be due to lack of confidence.
      
      Sometimes its just for fun

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      edhanposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, I do agreed that some may do it for fun.

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10. 69

    Darrell Robertsposted 12 years ago

    Once could also look at the situation this way how do we know who another person really has in their heart.  The way a person dresses means nothing to me, I am about looking at the choices that they make and the action that they take.  I also keep into account that some times a person may be in transition, working on trying to be a better person.  It take time to get to know another person and people change over time, so it is not the easiest thing to say who is who. 
    
    I do my best to try to see the good in all people, when people meet me I would like them to see the good in me. 
    
    Best wishes

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11. 60

    Princess Priscaposted 12 years ago

    
    
    Hello My fellow Hubbers,
    
    Thank you so much for so many outstanding and wise comments to this question.  Everyone was so honest and insightful.
    
    Blessings!
    Ciao...Princess Prisca

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