Women purposing to men.... thoughts?

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   writerjroseposted 8 years ago

   Women purposing to men.... thoughts?
   
   Apparently it's a new trend where women are now going down on their knee and purposing to the men in their lives. How do you feel about that? Is it socially unacceptable or weird? Are you all for women purposing to men? Or should our traditions of men purposing to women remain the same?

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   chuckandus6posted 8 years ago

   i think its a little strange but not any different then woman asking man out to dinner

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Very true!
      Two people have a wonderful conversation. Doe it really matter who initiated the conversation?  All that matters is that it did take place! Self-empowerment is about being (proactive) and going after what you want in life!

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      It seems strange to us because it's not yet the social norm for women to propose to men. But great point and excellent elaboration Dashing! What matters is that the conversation/dinner/proposal happened.

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   Benny01posted 8 years ago

   Firstly, in this part of the  world where I come from, Its untraditional for woman to propose to a man.
   
   Secondly, it would be seen as desperation instead of love.
   
   The society has made it seem odd for women to propose and  I am afraid for any brave woman who has succeeded in proposing to a man, because the man might end up taking her for granted.
   
   Please change the word 'purpose' to propose.
   
   Thanks.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      "it would be seen as desperation instead of love."
      Is it "desperation" when a man proposes to woman?
      Ideally one only proposes to someone they know loves them and has shown it over time.
      FYI: Lots of married folks take each other for granted!

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I understand how it can seem as desperation, especially when cultural/religious beliefs are factored in. THANK YOU for pointing that out, lol I can't believe I wrote purpose instead of propose :S i can't edit the question though. Thanks for sharing!

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Lots of women battle over being "special" VS "equal". Fairytales are hard to let go of. Even the movie Cinderella released in 2015 has made more than $500M worldwide!
      Millions of little girls will dream about their prince sweeping them away!

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   peter565posted 8 years ago

   My thought when I see it "Well, I guess we know who is the one wearing the pants in this relationship.  And it isn't the guy. ha ha ha"

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Well that brings up another question. Is it emasculating for the man if the woman proposes? Any MEN out there, how would you feel if your girlfriend proposed to you? Thanks for sharing peter.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      It only feels emasculating if the man is NOT "in love" with the woman. People who are "in love" tend do some of the most "crazy" things to show how much they care about one another!
      They're happy until other people tell them they shouldn't be.

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5. 80

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   
   
   An old adage goes: "If it's not worth asking for it's not worth having."
   There is nothing wrong with a woman proposing to a man especially if they've been in a long-term committed relationship for years.
   Too often women will say they want it "to be the man's idea" and then when it's not happening they'll give him an (ultimatum) or keep dropping "hints". It's the same as her "indirectly proposing".
   Another group of women are content to "suffer in silence" and if the relationship ends they{ blame the man} for "wasting their time"!
   I suspect quite a few of them also fear rejection or being put off. However at least they'll know where they stand and can move on.
   For a lot of women it comes down to their "pride" or "ego" along with still having the desire to live out the "fairytale" portrayed in movies.
   As for being "socially acceptable" it's really no one's business what goes on in your relationship or behind your closed doors.
   The real issue here is all of her girlfriends and family will be asking her how, where, and when did (he) propose?
   They'd be too embarrassed to admit they did the proposing!.
   When it's all said and done if a couple does get married it shouldn't make a difference as to who proposed to whom.
   The end results are the same!

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Great answer! You covered many different aspects of the question, and I agree with you, at the end of the day, the result is the same, two people who love each other and who agree to spend the rest of the their lives together.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Jenna!
      Sometimes there's too much "I & Me" and not enough "Us & We" in relationships. Misplaced pride & ego have kept many people from having what (they want) out of life.
      When both people are "in love" no one is  loses!

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      So very true! Thank you for sharing all your insights Dashing!

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   M. T. Dremerposted 8 years ago

   I think it's long overdue. A lot of great relationships could start from a woman taking the initiative if the man in the relationship might be too timid or clueless to do it himself. Expecting the man to do it is an unequal gender stereotype that should rightfully go extinct. Either person can propose when ever they feel it is right.

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      It is an unequal gender stereotype. I find it ironic when a woman is all for gender equality, but when it comes to proposing, it's the mans "job". It really is just about two individuals committing to one another.

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   savvydatingposted 8 years ago

   The "going down on one knee" thing for women isn't going to cut it. No doubt, some men would be thrilled to have a woman show her subservience to him in this manner. However, throughout the ages, men have gone down on one knee out of deference and love for the woman.....with the knowledge that he is physically stronger and could easily overpower her. And so, the bending of the knee is a sign of respectfulness---even if he can easily exert his power or strength over her. He is, in essence, saying, "I love you and I want us to be lovers and partners together, forever."
   If a woman goes down on one knee, she will forever feel subservient to the man.
   Nevertheless, if they have a long standing relationship and she says, "Lets get married," only because she knows he's been dying to marry her, that's a different story. Still, she does not bend her knee. Frankly, any man who would allow a woman to get down on her knees is not a man. Truth be told, he is a no better than a predator. I would avoid such a man like the plague.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I agree that going down on one knee isn't that appealing. In fact it looks kind of corny even when men do it in this era. Nevertheless if someone chooses to do so I wouldn't judge them. Love  has often made people abandon appearance concerns!

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Dashing, I disagree.  Corny has nothing to do with it. A man in love would never allow the woman he loves to get down on one knee to propose. A woman who does this is misguided. Furthermore, I do judge a man who allows this to happen.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      savvydating, I doubt most people get down on one knee anymore, )
      If someone does do it their mate usually (caught off guard)! The person who chooses to kneel does so because (they) want to not because they were "allowed" regardless of gender.

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Allowed?  No. Political correctness has no place in romance. Many women like the corny thing of men getting down on one knee if he so chooses. It's romantic. Let's leave the 60's equality speech out of romance. It didn't work then & doesn't work

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      If there's a lesbian couple and one woman got on a knee to propose would you judge the other woman for "allowing" her?
      You said: "A man in love would never allow the woman he loves to get down on one knee to propose." Is romance based on gender?

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      savvydatingposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Dashing, I would not judge a lesbian woman for getting down on one knee to propose. Usually, one of them is more "masculine." Consequently, it may feel natural for her to propose in this manner. I was previously referring to heterosexual couples.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      savvydating, I get where you're coming from. I just believe when two people are "in love" no one should be made to feel ashamed because they initiated {anything} even a marriage proposal based upon their gender. Misplaced pride stifles love.

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      writerjroseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I understand what you mean about the woman being "subservient" to the man if she goes down on one knee, and I never looked at it like that, but I also think it's a form of empowerment, she's taking control and shows the equality in their relationship

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