Would YOU allow a sleepover for your older teenaged children if they were in a s

1. 84

   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   Would YOU allow a sleepover for your older teenaged children if they were in a serious relationship?
   
   Why? Why not?
   
   

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2. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   
   
   No!
   I'm not running a hotel and if I had children my responsibility is to look out for them and not win brownie points for being their friend.
   The primary focus of high school years is to get an education to prepare for college or some skilled training in a tech school.
   Teenage love for the most part is nothing more than an evolution of romantic experience in conjunction with raging hormones.
   The truth of the matter when it comes to love and relationships most of us (fail our way) to success. Very few people meet their "soul-mate" at age 16, 17, or 18.  If this were not the case we'd all be married to our high school sweethearts!
   In ten years most teens look back on their high school years with laughter at the beliefs they had while being immature and naïve.
   Even parents who have discussions with their teens about sex, birth control, and safe sex deep down really hope they're not doing it!
   In fact it's mutual for the most part that neither the teens or the parents want to imagine either of them having sex!
   When I was growing up adults and teens had sex in secret.
   Parents took advantage of an empty house when kids were away or wee hours of the morning when they knew they were asleep. Teens on the other hand went to the drive-in or some secluded spot and had sex in the back seat of a car. In other instances they skipped school and went to someone's house where both parents were at work.
   Out of respect. We maintained "the illusion" of not having sex!

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3. 78

   Say Yes To Lifeposted 8 years ago

   In Hawaii, this is common.  If the girl gets pregnant, her parents take care of the baby.  Some high schools even have day care centers!
   While it's great that people here are less judgmental, the price for this is high.  Teen pregnancy is rampant, educational quality is low, and domestic violence abounds.  One Hawaiian coworker told me while the boys stand by their pregnant girlfriends, they have not acquired the skills for a job that will support even themselves, let alone a family, so they take it out on their spouses through violence.
   Sex is for responsible adults.  For this reason, I say no.

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4. 0

   LoliHeyposted 8 years ago

   HELL NO I wouldn't!!!!!  Who in their right mind would do that?  Teens can be in serious relationships but they should be more focused on kid stuff and school than on sex.  Kids should not be having sex!!!  It's for grown-ups, really should be for married people only.

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5. 60

   fpherj48posted 8 years ago

   HUH???!!   What did you ask?!   teenager~ my child~ serious(?) relationship?  SLEEPOVER???   ALLOW??!!!!
   
   Let me get a glass of water and a pill!.....Step back, let me breathe.....I'm hyperventilating.......get me a paper bag!!    ROFLMAO....somebody slap me, I'm hysterical...........
   
   OK, I'm fine now.  I can answer.  absolutely 100%, simply, utterly, emphatically    NOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

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6. 91

   VerityPriceposted 8 years ago

   All of the answers so far seem to be by people with kids, so I'm gonna answer as a childless, 21 year old woman who was having sex at age 16. First and foremost:
   There is no way that you can stop kids from having sex.
   
   If you ban sex in your house; they'll just go somewhere else to do it. If you don't tell your kids that using contraceptives is important to avoid pregnancy and STDs; then you kid will get pregnant/catch an STD.
   
   I know many people who were more responsible at 18 than some 40 year olds I know. Experience does not equate to responsibility.
   At 16 (at least in the UK) your child is an adult and is viewed as sexually mature enough to make their own decisions. If you try to prevent your child from making these decisions, then all you are saying to them is that you don't trust them and that you don't see them as responsible.
   
   You cannot ever prevent someone from having sex, just by banning sleepovers in your house. All you can do is educate your child from a young age on how to stay safe and how to make responsible decisions, then you can rest assured that when they are having sex they won't be doing it behind your back and they won't be doing it in an unsafe way.
   
   My parents allowed me to stay over at my boyfriends house when I was 16, they knew what was probably gonna happen. They emphasised to me how crucial it is to be safe and I was encouraged to do my own research on anything that intrigued me. As such I have been having responsible, safe sex for 5 years and I am someone who is confident sexually.
   
   Repressing the (completely natural) desires of your 16 year old is invasive and can lead to much worse damage in the long run. Hiding sex from them as if it's 'only for us grown-ups', will just mean that as soon as they are out of your grasp the first thing they will do, is what they were never allowed to do at home.
   
   Educating your child is the most important thing you can do. On how to have safe sex, on how to respect their partner (i.e not forcing them if they're not ready), telling your daughters that they don't need to do anything just to impress someone, telling them about STD's etc etc etc All of this is far superior than even refusing to admit to your child that sex even exists.

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   1. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I don't have any children. I too had sex as a teenager! However parents are entitled to have rules for {their household}. The age of consent to have sex isn't proof one is an adult. I didn't feel like an adult until I had a job and my own place!

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7. 52

   Jewl barrettposted 8 years ago

   No cause they might do something wrong together and its best to keep your child safe and away from harm

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8. 78

   junksellerposted 8 years ago

   Sure.
   
   If I didn't trust my kid in that situation then I would have already failed as a parent.

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9. 73

   Besarienposted 8 years ago

   I don't want anybody having sex in my house except for my husband and I. Seriously, my sister and her husband- I don't want them funking up my spare room.  I wouldn't have sex in their house.

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10. 57

    jerrycarmanposted 8 years ago

    I would not let any children sleepover with anybody in the world. You should not let it happen or  you will be sorry later in another relationship.

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11. 70

    Aime Fposted 8 years ago

    I consider myself to be very open-minded and plan on having open, honest communication with my daughter about sex when the time comes.  I will never utter the words "you cannot have sex" nor will I shame her for thinking about it.  I will encourage her to be safe and responsible, to follow her heart, to do only what she is comfortable with. 
    
    But my answer to this would still be no.  I can give her the freedom to make her own (hopefully educated) decisions without encouraging it.  I lost my virginity at 16 and I never would have wanted to have a sleepover with my boyfriend as to me that was a direct message to my parents that "hey guys, I'm having sex right now!!!"  While my parents were very supportive of me and never said I was forbidden from having sex, it was one of those things that I didn't really want to flaunt, either.
    
    I never felt that my parents were being too strict or unfair by saying I couldn't sleep at my boyfriend's house (he was 4 years older than me and had his own apartment).  I was still allowed to visit, I had alone time with him, but I was still a minor and I still had boundaries.  I was totally okay with that and appreciated my parents' concern. 
    
    As someone else said, if the kids are gonna do it then they're gonna do it.  She can have all the emotional support she needs and I'll take her to get birth control, but I don't think I need to give her a bed under my roof to do it in. 

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12. 86

    tamarawilhiteposted 8 years ago

    No, because if they are too young to drive, vote, have a credit card or make other adult decisions, they are too young to risk STDs that can't be cured or pregnancy.

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