I'd like feedback on my poem: Vivarium Tunnel

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  1. profile image0
    Mentocioposted 4 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my poem? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
    Here is my poem: Vivarium Tunnel (must be signed in to view)

    1. Brenda Arledge profile image81
      Brenda Arledgeposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Add a poem Summary at the top.
      Place a few videos which describe your poem.
      And add a photo...i use pixabay alot.

  2. Morris Sandrene profile image80
    Morris Sandreneposted 4 years ago

    I liked the fact that your poem was unpredictable and so bare and daring!

    1. profile image0
      Mentocioposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you. :-)

  3. GwennyOh profile image83
    GwennyOhposted 4 years ago

    It's a poem. Poems here really don't gain revenue, and the content is from a personal perspective, so it works for you, right? However, with that type of content it may be banned to ads. If not, it's cutting it close, by HP terms.

  4. AliciaC profile image93
    AliciaCposted 4 years ago

    I have the same suspicions as GwennyOh about the contents of your poem. I think the problems are near the beginning. Talking about smelling someone else’s feces during defecation may dissuade people from reading any more of your article. Linking a particular group to the smell as you do in the second half of the first text capsule could be a major problem.

  5. Rupert Taylor profile image78
    Rupert Taylorposted 4 years ago

    If I may quote from what is purported to be this "poem"

    "The smell of rotten feces, can it be shared?"

    This is not poetry it is crap.

  6. psycheskinner profile image67
    psycheskinnerposted 4 years ago

    I've bought a few dozen works of poetry over the years and while this one doesn't speak to me a lot, it is recognizably poetry. As others have mentioned it is not a genre that does well on Hubpages.  You might to better to write some articles about how or why to write poetry etc.

    1. profile image0
      Mentocioposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      +1.

 
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