Would you say "I do?",Before you know "who?"

1. 60

   lizy625posted 15 years ago

   Arranged marriages are truly not a thing of the past. Whether it be a religious, financial, or optimistic decision,-would you have an arranged marriage? Why, or why not?

   replyreport
   1. 0

      Lady_Eposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      No, not appealing.
      
      Some of them do work though- especially with Asians and maybe some mail-order brides.

      replyreport
   2. 48

      ushen princeposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      replyreport
   3. 64

      prettydarkhorseposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      marriage is for convenience anyway so why not? all marriages are arranged anyway, (so as to project what you can get from the other one. marriage as an institution is created to preserve or share wealth, security (financial, emotional) and for love. The last reason is questionable, we could be in love without the benefit of marriage.

      replyreport
   4. 0

      sethy12posted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I personally would not, it seems to creepy, getting married without knowing someone?!?

      replyreport
   5. 0

      F. Kenneth Taylorposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Hell no! Arranged marriages are just that, an 'arrangement', a quick fix between to families (usually well off) to better both of their social & financial status, like Tina said..."What's love got to do with it!?"
      
      Marriage is supposed to be an irreplaceable, joyous, special, once-in-a-lifetime event, as well as somewhat spiritual and sacred, there's nothing special, spiritual, or sacred about marrying a stranger for social status and wealth!

      replyreport
   6. 61

      sannyasinmanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Quite simply, no!

      replyreport
2. 58

   Wonder_Womanposted 15 years ago

   Marriage is something really special to me, i havent even married my bf of 5 years bc i want to be 100% its till death do us part

   replyreport
3. 54

   Pandemic Pressposted 15 years ago

   I personally would not, because it is not a part of my culture. However that being said, arranged marriage is not only "not a thing of the past" it is more common today than finding your own spouse!
   
   This is likely due to the fact that the countries in which arranged marriage is part of the culture have some of the largest populations in the world, but arranged marriage certainly exists in North America as well.
   
   Arranged marriages tend to last much longer than marriages out of choice, and I recall reading something about overall marrital satisfaction as well, but I'll have to look it up to be sure.

   replyreport
4. 60

   zadrobiposted 15 years ago

   I have a penpal in Chennai, India who talks about how strong the tradition of arranged marriages still are. I would definitely be like her and still be single-- even though I live here and still am single

   replyreport
5. 56

   shamelabboushposted 15 years ago

   Even if it's arranged marriage, I wouldn't accept it untill i date the person for a while. I can't just marry her and regret it later...

   replyreport
6. 0

   Poppa Bluesposted 15 years ago

   I could do it. It's not that hard to learn to love someone. It's not unlike taking home a new pet. You may find it impossible to train your new pet. You might even become angry when you find you just can't get him to do his business outside. Somehow, that's all forgiven when he greets you at the door tail wagging, jumping up to lick your face, and in general, just giving you love. When love is given unconditionally, it's hard to turn down. Over time in an arranged relationship, if at least one party is willing to love unconditionally or at least act that way, eventually that person will be embraced and love will blossom.

   replyreport
7. 60

   dejajolieposted 15 years ago

   I suppose I can see why that practice is around or resurfaced, but I could not. I hear all the time as Poppa Blues stated "You can learn to love someone". However, I have fallen in love the traditional way, dating, etc. and have fallen out of love. I could only imagine if I agreed to an arranged marriage with the thought of learning to'love' someone and then eventually realizing, it never happens.

   replyreport
   1. 0

      Poppa Bluesposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      There are all kinds of love. Those in arranged marriages start out with the mindset that they will commit to each other and make it work, and that is why they do! When we are free to love whoever, whenever, and that is our mindset, we do! That is why so many marriages in the US end in divorce.
      
      If I was to act on every attraction I'd have a new wife everyday! LOL!

      replyreport
8. 60

   teendadposted 15 years ago

   When you treat love as a verb, something you do, then love becomes a choice. If your marriage is arranged, I believe you can make it work. In high school, I worked part time at a call center and some of our database guys from India were in arranged marriages. I met their families and they seemed happy enough. I, however, could not do it because I am highly opposed to the idea of arranged marriages. I could never put forth the effort to put that love into action. It may just be my Western upbringing...

   replyreport
9. 80

   ixwaposted 15 years ago

   Hmm... Customs culture and so on play a role here. I found out from life that you are sometimes better-off with someone you grew-up with. Most of the times it works out. Nuff said!

   replyreport
   1. 0

      F. Kenneth Taylorposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      ixwa, I agree 100%!
      
      prettydarkhorse, Marriage is not supposed to be for 'convenience', you're supposed to marry someone because you love them, NOT, what they have; i.e. money, big house, etc...

      replyreport
10. 56

    Jekaposted 15 years ago

    I would look at arranged marrige from the other side. What if you "arrange' it yourself? Some married couples get married even there is not much love but because it is comfortable to be together. It is easy to share the bills, to share responsabilities. People live together because it is "easy". They arranged that kind of life. That is another thing that i consider as "arranged marrige".

    replyreport
11. 0

    sneakorocksolidposted 15 years ago

    That sounds great! Thats the perfect way to help a gender challenged person get the right connection because they obviously can't choose for themselves.

    replyreport
    1. 64

       prettydarkhorseposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       sure they can, they are just challenged lol

       replyreport
12. 66

    Ivorwenposted 15 years ago

    I've seen several arranged marriages, and they seem to be happy, to get along well and enjoy spending time with each other.  I have know those who wanted an arranged marriage.
    
    Personally, I wanted to know the man well, before making any commitment or getting too involved.I wanted to see him in many different situation, to know what kind of person he was.

    replyreport