Should We Lover Others More Than We Love us?

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   akhilkarunposted 14 years ago

   How should we love and care for others? Should we love them more than we love ourself or should we mind our business first?!

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      tksenseiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      The one makes the other possible. Neither is 'first.'

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      prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Love can never be measured! You just need to take care of yourself first before others!

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      cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      well i think you have to love yourself first.
      
      i also think that you should love your children above anyone else and put their needs first, including before your own.

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   aoiffe379posted 14 years ago

   Some people love others before they love themselves. That is like putting the cart before the horse. One problem with that method is the effect when the love is not returned by the person who receives it. This can lead to low self esteem as the person feels unworthy to receive love. There is a good reason why God says to love your neighbour as yourself.Those who love themselves will not mistreat and abuse themselves. The good thing about self love is that when you know you are worthy of love, you can brave the tide of criticism and all the negativity people throw your way. As a result, you can help those who need your help. Yes, deal with yourself first and in the process you will find others who see the true you.Most of all, you will know how to love them.

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   reeltaulkposted 14 years ago

   If you truly Love yourself, instinctively you will know how to love and care for someone else.  There are sacrifices that you will naturally take in the name of love without any thought.  There is no such thing as loving someone more than you love yourself, and if you do that would be considered something else.  Maybe low self esteem or a need for you to be accepted in some kind of way........ciao
   
   Vonda G. Nelson

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      rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I completely agree with you. very well said.

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         reeltaulkposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         thankyou rebekah

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   Cagsilposted 14 years ago

   To understand "should we love others more than we love us?"
   
   You need only one thing- LOVE YOURSELF!
   
   This will grant you the ability to love others.
   
   You can no more love them than yourself.
   
   You can no more love yourself than them.
   
   Have a Nice Day!

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   Flightkeeperposted 14 years ago

   If you love someone, you love someone. I do think it's independent of how much you love yourself.

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   Stimpposted 14 years ago

   Define "others"....other human beings, animals, god, etc.
   
   I have a tremendous amount of love toward my animals (I have no children of my own).  I would say and others have said that I do love my animals more than myself.  Why?  Because they give back so much more than they are provided in a lot of instances.  An abused animal will STILL love and protect the abuser unconditionally.  THAT is love.
   
   I will be honest, I don't really love myself unconditionally....sad, yes...but true.  there are alot of "if onlys" that go through my head.  Those "if onlys" don't go through their heads at all.  They don't care one way or the other if I've put on a few pounds, they don't care if my face breaks out, they don't care if my hair is the wrong color.  They ONLY care about ME.

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   TINA Vposted 14 years ago

   Words of Wisdom about Love
   *  You cannot truly love others if you don't know how to love yourself.
   *  You don't love a person in the same way at the same time.
   *  When you love, do not expect anything in return.  You will be unhappy.
   *  Love because it is your will to love.  Give because it is your will to give.  Live because it is your will to live.
   *  Love is the greatest risk in life but it has the greatest result in time.
   
   Just nice thoughts to share . . . :-)

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      Stimpposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I agree.  Very nice thoughts.

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   Poppa Bluesposted 14 years ago

   You can not even begin to love another until you love yourself. Because love isn't something you get, it's something you give and because when you love someone you are basically giving yourself, then you need yourself to be something special, something valued above all else. When someone gets such a gift, they instantly know how precious a gift it is. Without love of your self, that gift is then a meaningless object, like another grain of sand on the beach. Love yourself, know yourself, and give yourself and you will know love.

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   Lisa HWposted 14 years ago

   I can't say I'd use the word "love" toward myself at all.  What I feel about myself and the whole range of feelings I have for the people I love are two completely different things.  I pretty like the person I am as far as character goes.  I see my own imperfections and apparently "love" myself enough to think they aren't that big of a deal.  I take care of myself.  I feel as if I have solid sense of being a worthwhile person, but there are zero emotions attached to that "analysis" I have of myself.
   
   Love isn't about self, though.  I once read a book that analyzed all types of love, and it said the one thing all the different types of love have in common in respect and admiration for the person we love.  I respect myself, but I don't admire myself.     I look at someone like my three grown kids, and I admire them today every bit as I admired them as babies and children.  When I think about the love I've always had for them it makes me feel like my lungs are filling with air, and it can make me feel like I want to cry because the love is so "big".   So, I tend to think if we're mentally healthy and have appropriately sized egos it would not be possible to "love" ourselves - "like ourselves ok", maybe; but not "love" ourselves.    In fact, with narcissism being what it is, I'd almost say that if we love ourselves that's the thing would make loving someone else impossible. 

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    Lisa HWposted 14 years ago

    I can't say I'd use the word "love" toward myself at all.  What I feel about myself and the whole range of feelings I have for the people I love are two completely different things.  I pretty like the person I am as far as character goes.  I see my own imperfections and apparently "love" myself enough to think they aren't that big of a deal.  I take care of myself.  I feel as if I have solid sense of being a worthwhile person, but there are zero emotions attached to that "analysis" I have of myself.
    
    Love isn't about self, though.  I once read a book that analyzed all types of love, and it said the one thing all the different types of love have in common in respect and admiration for the person we love.  I respect myself, but I don't admire myself.     I look at someone like my three grown kids, and I admire them today every bit as I admired them as babies and children.  When I think about the love I've always had for them it makes me feel like my lungs are filling with air, and it can make me feel like I want to cry because the love is so "big".   So, I tend to think if we're mentally healthy and have appropriately sized egos it would not be possible to "love" ourselves - "like ourselves ok", maybe; but not "love" ourselves.    In fact, with narcissism being what it is, I'd almost say that if we love ourselves that's the thing would make loving someone else impossible. 

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    xiao_kangposted 14 years ago

    It would be a beautiful world if we all loved each other more than we love ourself. Maybe that day will come. In the meantime, it's a dangerous thing to love other people more than yourself. I've lived my life loving others far more than I loved myself, regardless of who or what that person is. Living like that has opened me up to all sorts of abuse, disappointment, and heartache. For those that love themselves far more than they love anyone else (if they love anyone at all) finding a person that freely offers their love is like winning the lottery. To them we've become an abundant source of encouragement, support, and the ultimate ego boost.
    Despite my bad experiences being a loving individual I refuse to abandon the thought that if I love first it will change the world. But wisdom has tought me that I can love I just need to do it with my shields on maximum and with my heart firmly intact. I have turned my love for others into a source of self-love, where when I love them I love me, continuously refilling my cup so that I can share with others.
    I will continue to love others more or as much as I love myself, and because of it my life will never be without love.

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