i'm depressed because i'm old and no one likes me. how can i be happy?

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  1. profile image51
    bassplayersrgodsposted 13 years ago

    i'm depressed because i'm old and no one likes me. how can i be happy?

    i am bald. i am deaf. i am divorced. i am self centered. i am the best musician in the area where i live. i am old (53).

  2. MickS profile image59
    MickSposted 13 years ago

    You can make a start by ceasing to wallow in your own self pity.

  3. vrbmft profile image73
    vrbmftposted 13 years ago

    Come on, give it up!  Old?  What the heck you talkin about?  My cribbage buddy, age ninety two, just had a pace maker put in.  He's worried he's going to die and he doesn't give a rats ass about who likes him or not.  Bald?  I mean what does that mean?  So you have one place on your body you don't have hair.  Who's complaining besides you?  Play and ENJOY your music.  Forget about being the best.  If you are not happy, then you must not be the best.  If you are the best, then enjoy that and PLAY, man, PLAY and invite the big musician in the sky to play along with you.  ARE YOU EXERCISING?  Are you getting enough sleep?  In general, are you taking care of YOU?  Yes, we know you're narcissistic, but that's not the same as taking care of yourself.  I'm 65 and altho I have a lot of challenges going on in my life, I am perfectly happy.  It is a choice really.  AND on anygiven day, I totally understand.  I am right where you are, but I don't let myself stay in that place.  I consciously choose to move out of it, into the NOW and be happy.  When you get out of the shower in the morning, bend over and look at yourself in the mirror till you notice that a part of yourself is an Ahole.  Then laugh your butt off for the rest of the day and be sure that that part is only a part.  Join the crowd, be like the rest of us while being you and special all at the same time.

  4. Merlin Fraser profile image59
    Merlin Fraserposted 13 years ago

    I agree with MickS  get over yourself,  if you think 53 is old....

    Age is a number only and one that is in your head, if you think old you will feel and act old.

    There are people on this site that could give 10, 20 and even 30 years who are full of life and feel that living every day is a joy and a opportunity to live.   

    Take a read of the message in the Hub below

    http://hubpages.com/hub/The-true-meanin … ce-DayYall

    Plus instead of making a negative list of things... I'm Bald, I'm Deaf, I'm Depressed.....None of which is actually life threatning.

    Try making a positive list of everything that is good, you could start with  I'm alive, I can play a musical instrument...(Many of us can't).

    Go out and do something nice for someone less fortunate than yourself  that'll make you feel better about yourself.

    Then come back and tell us about it.

  5. Loveslove profile image60
    Lovesloveposted 13 years ago

    Stop Moaning....
    Im almost 63,got bad knees,which hurt daily in fact are so painful  it reduces me to tears ,a bad back and i recently lost most of my hair..Do I moan about it ? Do I heck..I am alive,Ive 6 gorgeous grandchildren,3 kids ,a husband and a special friend all whom I adore without question...and Life...well life is for living mate...there is a lot of suffering in this world ,people with life threatning diseases  and nobody to care for them...what the hell you moaning about ? get on with life go do something in your local community to help those less fortunate than yourself...you are alive ..live it !!

  6. Adria Firestone profile image61
    Adria Firestoneposted 13 years ago

    Jump in a lake, swallow a snake and come up with a tummy ache! ;-)

    Just being alive doesn't matter for much. Do you realize that you are the author of your life and if you don't like it, YOU have the power to change it?

    As one musician to another, go share your music with others -- give -- and the pleasure you receive will little by little, make you feel better. You are sad and that's OK, feel it, grieve and keep moving.

    Go to a halfway house, a hospital and share your music. Serve food at a soup kitchen and in giving you will find your joy again. Try it, start with once a week and then do one little thing for someone else everyday -- let me know how you feel after 90 days.

    Old? Just a number on a calendar. . .

  7. skgrao profile image66
    skgraoposted 13 years ago

    Old is Gold.
    Start teaching Music.
    Every one will love you.
    58 is the age to retire from Govt service.You are not even that.Our Musicians in India are over 70.They are bald,they dye their hair.They play music for films.Our Painter F.M.Hussain is 95 and he painted Hindu Gods Naked and there was nation wide uproar,he left India and is in Dubai painting and living in a million Dollar home and a car.Young man bald people are loved by women as they get a extra kick moving their hands on your head during sex.

  8. SteveoMc profile image71
    SteveoMcposted 13 years ago

    If you think you are old and pathetic, then you are old and pathetic.  Good job wasting all your time.

    "We don't stop playing because we got old,   We got old because we stopped playing."   George Benard Shaw

  9. Emissionguy profile image77
    Emissionguyposted 13 years ago

    being self centered is you biggest worry. if you can somehow teach yourself to be more giving you will find this one thing can improve your life a lot. Perhaps teach music.

    You can start with not starting every sentance with "I am"

  10. Flightkeeper profile image64
    Flightkeeperposted 13 years ago

    You're never going to be happy with that attitude.  If you really want to do something about it you have to define happiness for you and work towards it.

  11. R Pseudomen profile image71
    R Pseudomenposted 13 years ago

    "Best musician in your area", you should make that work for you then. I'm certain that you don't just play for yourself, so find places to play for others. Find, or create, a band if you're not already in one.
    Your music is your escape and you need to escape, buddy, but only you can make this happen.
    Ignore these other posts, you aren't someone else, you are you. You are an individual not a blank wall to be painted into something you are not.
    Play and keep playing, that is my advice to you.

  12. profile image0
    Always Greenerposted 13 years ago

    You seem to have a really negative opinion of yourself - which is not your fault.  Self-centred people usually don't think they are self-centred.  See a properly-trained psychologist who can help you through your issues and give you the advice you may require; I don't think anyone here can offer much better than that.

  13. Goodpal profile image76
    Goodpalposted 13 years ago

    I have all the qualifications to share my empathy with you, being a distressed soul for over 2 decades. Though my miseries were different but the sense of hopelessness and frustrations are similar. Vipassana Meditation and brainwave technology helped me a lot. You can read about Vipassana meditation at


    Further, scientifically speaking you appear to be a right-brained man! Please don't misunderstand me and read this hub

    http://hubpages.com/hub/Whole-Brain-Bet … Two-Halves

    And try the techniques to develop your left brain. You can also relax with the help of brainwave entrainment audios while simultaneously playing some motivational tape. I am positive that in not time you will be bubbling with energy.

    Remember: You ARE much stronger than you think !!

  14. fucsia profile image62
    fucsiaposted 13 years ago

    you are not depressed because you are old and no one likes you, but because you do not love you. The first thing to do is accepting yourself ..... You must working on this: look in the mirror and accept your image, listen to your body and accept it, listen to your thoughts and accept them

  15. moneycop profile image59
    moneycopposted 12 years ago

    Who is old your body or you first decide this. Then realize about app happiness you got earlier, if they were stable at any stage. Then see who is happy in  this world. You will find all are having the depreciating happiness and all are equal. The one who is sound in mind and heart is always happy .I had detailed it you can read. Feel happy !!! with love.

  16. BrainSmart profile image38
    BrainSmartposted 11 years ago

    there are a number of approaches you can take, first and foremost must learn to love yourself. Research shows that those who have low self-esteem are more inclined to depressing moments. Happiness is quantitative, and as we journey through life our quest for happiness becomes more elusive . Good luck


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