Have you ever seen someone die?
Not "have you ever seen a dead person" but have you ever watched someone actually die? Describe the situation if you'd like to.
Yes, unfortunately I have Laura. It is something you never get over. Unfortunately, more than one.
I'm sorry, JThomp42, for your losses may be very great and your burdens may be very heavy. I hope that, though you never get over it, yet you get through it and it becomes part of your soul in a meaningful way. Thanks for answering; and be well, JT.
Yes. Being a nurse on a unit where we have elderly and very sick patients, this happens quite often. If their eyes are open, you can tell the exact moment of death by them. The spark is there, and then it is gone. Not like on tv. You can't fake that. Sometimes it is quite peaceful, and other times not. I will make it a point to be with a dying patient as much as possible if they have no family members there. Not that I want to witness it, but I do not want them to be alone. Some have "hallucinations" before they die. We will call it hallucinations anyway. They see their dead loved ones sometimes and actually have conversations with them. Others reach for things no one else can see. Sometimes they go into a sleep state before they actually die, and we are not sure what they are conscious of, if anything at all. I have only seen one who fought death til the bitter end. As he was actually dying, he was screaming in pain saying "It burns! It burns!" Now I do not believe in a burning hell, so I have no explanation for that one. I could go on, and on, but I will stop here. Great question.
You are truly an angel, xanzacow, for no one I know of wants to die alone, yet the burden on you must be great. I am fascinated by your description of the "hallucinations" and equally puzzled by the "burning hell" person. Perhaps it was his disease.
Perhaps, Laura, I am still baffled by that one. I suppose the loss of blood flow to the limbs, as usually happens with a slow death, could account for this.
I watched my 90 year old father die. He had been in hospital for several weeks with kidney problems and complications and we as a family knew that this was probably his last stand. For the last two days family members kept a constant vigil as he lay unconscious in bed. The previous week or so he had gradually declined - four days before he died he said his goodbyes in his own way and prepared to meet his maker. He was a religious man and had a bible to hand. We sang hymns for him.
In his final moments his steady breathing began to falter, his legs stopped their involuntary movements and his eyes began to flicker. All was quiet as he passed over. Painless and dignified.
Chef-de-jour, I'm very sorry for your loss. What a precious story of love, faith, and strength, though. Thank you so much for sharing it (I doubt there's a dry eye reading this--at least mine aren't). May your heart and family be at peace...
That sucks that you lost him. I'm really sorry.
Yes, I was walking up from work, saw a man slumped in his car, I went in and held him up, but, alas, he died in my arms befdore I had time to call an ambulance.
Oh, I'm so sad for you! To carry such a memory and to be that close to him and unable to help... Thanks for sharing such a terrible/sacred/poignant moment with us!
Yes. In my job as a nurse it's part of the work we carry out to care for people who are dying and give as much support to their loved ones as we can. So Unfortunately I've been through this scenario many times.
Thank you, Seeker7, for being an angel for those who need you the most at a most delicate time in their lives. I'm sure that you are appreciated for every little thing you do and say to ease the transition, for those who will remain living and not.
Have you ever seen a friend or family member die?
I, for one, have not. Most of my family died when I was young, back when the hospitals would not let young people in a dying person's presence. My last memory of my Grandma was years before her death when I was 6 because of that hospital's rule :-(.
Yes, I have. All I'm going to say about is that it sucks. It's the most helpless feeling in the world.
Wow, I think most of us would agree there! You're not alone, though it may feel lonely to carry such a memory. I'm fairly certain that, where life and death are concerned, there's very little you can do to "help", though you may want to.
Yes I have and I can tell you its one of the worst feelings in the world. It never leaves your memory.
I believe you--thank you for sharing your experience. I have found the same to be true with my memory. In my case, sound is what I remember the most.
Yes, I was with my grandfather, holding his hand in the hospital when he died. They had taken him off of life support, but I swore he still squeezed my hand at appropriate moments and thought he still had cognition when I spoke about certain things to him. I felt a bit offended that, of all his family - including his wife and daughters - I was the one there at that end, but in a way I was glad, because I loved him so much and he knew it.
LucyLiu, what a sweet but sad story. Thank you so much for sharing it. I'm certain that your grandfather knew you were there and was equally glad that you were there. I have no doubt that he was squeezing your hand at appropriate moments. Peace.
I, too, saw someone die, and the sounds and the visual were literally out of sync for my friends and I were on one side of a rocky gorge and a bunch of teenagers were on the other. First would come the image, then would come the sound. The kids were climbing on the rocky wall next to technical rock climbers, all roped in and helmeted with a spotter on the ground managing their ropes and chalked-up hands. There was a lot of yelling--the technical rock climbers yelling at the kids to "get back", and the kids yelling happily at the new form of freedom they'd found on a perfect, warm Minnesota spring day. I looked away for a moment, making certain of the safety of my own group of friends as we all watched in horror at the probable outcome. We heard, "I'm slipping, I'm slipping, I'm slipping" in a young woman's voice, then saw a person falling almost in slow motion down by the cliffside in freefall until she hit the ground. We then heard her last words, "I'm slipping! Ahh!", a surprised scream cut short as her breath was taken away by the fall, and her realization of her upcoming death. Then, a sound that could only be described as that of a tree falling in a forest--a thousand branches breaking all at once. The mind failed to comprehend, for a moment, that it was this young woman's life-bones breaking. Our group, now thoroughly out of the mood to rock climb and swim on our side of the river, ate our picnic lunches in total silence, not wanting to leave the pathetic little body lying there among the rocks without any cover or protection. About a half hour later an ambulence arrived at the visitor's area near a boat dock, without sirens or flashing lights. The EMTs, in hiking boots and shorts, carefully carried a small stretcher back into the barely accessible region in which the young woman had died so suddenly. Some of her friends had clustered up at the top of the cliff, in the parking lot look-out spot from where they had so perilously started their descent, then cut it short when tragedy struck the most intrepid amongst them. The rest of her friends had quickly run down the groomed trails to the lower parking area and, when it arrived, gathered by the ambulance as though it were an official meeting spot for their friend's return.
Deaths were so common here that, sadly, her fall from the cliffs, by the "Do not climb here" sign and on the far side of the fence attempting to hold people back, was not even reported on the evening news or the next day's paper.
Yes, when I was 8, my father dropped dead in the kitchen right in front of me.
Omigosh! I'm SO sorry, duffsmom! I hope that you have come to terms with this and are able to keep that memory separate from your good, living memories of your father. I wish for you a peaceful heart and solid footing and all the best.
Yes, February 4, 2012... my husband. It broke my heart. I still can't seem to put the pieces of my life back together.
I'm so sorry! Proudmama, please do something very hard: ask a therapist, clergyperson, psychiatrist, etc. to help you put your life back together, no matter how hard it is to ask for help. Your kids need their proudmama back and so do YOU! It's time.
My mom slowly faded away. She had lived a long life, nearly 91 years, we were all surprised she was gone. She was there directing Christmas Eve dinner. Enjoyed Christmas day with us and the next day we found her collapsed 7 hours later her heart just beat slower and slower and then she was gone. It is hard to believe she has been gone for 7 years.
Tirelesstraveler, you have traveled a difficult road indeed. Your mom isn't gone when she has folks to remember her in such a positive manner, both her life & her graceful death. Peace be upon you and your family, for your mom would surely want t
Actually i witnessed one with my two eye's , in fact i was astonished because that was my first time to be encounter with person in such a mood. At that time the guy was field up with fidget and undercut. He started shouting Later! later!! the guy's mood now appear to be lethal, so my dear death is unfair and unavoidable.
Wow! Indeed, death is unfair and unavoidable. May your memory of that event fade quickly into the back of your mind and not trouble you any more, for there is no accounting for such things logically.
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