For those who had verbally abusive fathers, did you become stronger or was your

  1. gmwilliams profile image83
    gmwilliamsposted 4 years ago

    For those who had verbally abusive fathers, did you become stronger or was your self-esteem

    irreparably damaged?

  2. connieow profile image76
    connieowposted 4 years ago

    Good morning Grace,

    I do not believe we are ever irreparably damaged from any experience.  Perhaps hidden in the closet with fear as a companion, but the light always peeks through the cracks in the door.

    As a child we do not have the type of control we dream of, as a teen we attempt rebellion and move, sometimes, into self-destruction.  We live a life of proof of our un-worthiness.  It is a life of choice, despite the feeling we have no choice. 

    Recovery is a difficult path.  There are many shadows that continue to reach out to pull you back into the darkness.  But with time, desire, willingness, we finally walk in the Light with the shadows sitting on the side line wondering what went wrong.

    Anyone of us who have lived a life of trauma can and do recover.  "IF" we have the desire, we ask the right questions of our Divine Guardians and the lead us to the resources to aid us in our journey. 

    How do I know this?  Because I am recovery from a childhood of abuse, in all areas of my life.  Recovery has been a boon to me.  I take a line from A.A.'s big book: "We do recover IF we have the capacity to be honest."  What I took that to mean, is self-honest.  "It is not the lies you tell me that will bring you harm, but the lies you tell yourself."  A friend told me that a long time ago and it stuck.

    I send you blessings on your journey.  There are the resources available to heal those wounds and recover.  I have plenty to share.  Bless you and those who follow.

  3. Angel Van Atta profile image77
    Angel Van Attaposted 4 years ago

    My self esteem was greatly effected by the actions of my father and father figures in my life. It is very important to let your children know how much value them. How smart they are. How beautiful they are. How amazing they are. Children need to learn that they are the most valuable things in your lives. It's important. I believe that if every child grew up feeling loved then the world would most definitely be a better place.


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