How does being fired, scandals, failures, mishaps, & other adversities make certain people
highly successful when such incidents can immobilize, even psychic paralyze other people, making them give up all hope?
Depression sets in when one feels they have no options.
It's a form of shortsightedness to feel that what is happening in our life today means the rest of our life is going to be the same way.
We give up hope whenever we discount the possibility of a better future. Feeling depressed is about the pain one feels in the moment. It also can be tied to their lack of desire/energy to move on, start over/anew, or change. In order to move on you have to let go.
Depressed people tend to keep replaying the events over and over.
Everyone throws a "pity party" now and then but eventually the music stops. Eventually anger or pride leads one to prove no one or nothing can hold them down. Sometimes it's just a matter of reconnecting with positivity and a spirituality sense that lifts them out of the abyss to try something new. Avoiding "negative self-talk" is a fulltime job.
Motivational speaker Les Brown once asked the following question:
How do you eat an elephant? The answer was: "One bite at a time."
Oftentimes what paralyzes and discourages us is looking at our challenge in it's completeness. Setting "mini goals" such as sending out 5 resumes a day, making x number of calls, attending one networking meeting a month, spending a couple of hours per day researching companies or people who might be able to assist, choose to associate with people who are living out their dreams, or read biographies of those who did, create a dream board, use daily affirmations, meditations, and visualization to lift your spirits.
Squeeze in a fun activity you enjoy over every weekend even if it's only walking along the beach while listening to music from your iPod.
Having structure usually leads to having focus which leads to victory.
I don't necessarily think some "adversities" (or just "generally bad things that happen") are the things that contribute to someone's eventual success or general well-being. I think in many cases people either go into what the the bad thing is with a healthy perspective and ability to figure out out to cope, how to to manage the thing (and its consequences), etc.; or else people unprepared for some types of "bad things" are hit with them and didn't have what it took in the first place to survive them.
I think it makes a big difference how old someone is, how responsible for other people (like their children/family, for example) they are, how much their "bad thing" has affected them, etc. And, I think WHAT the bad thing is/was makes a big difference too.
Some bad things prepare people for other bad things, of course. So, I suppose, if one or another type of bad thing isn't so devastating (to the individual and/or his family) some bad things can make good practice for others that may follow. Some may knock people's whole lives for such a loop that they affect more than just the individual. Sometimes the person who must make accommodations because of the bad thing must make less-than-ideal choices (like taking a job away from one's once promising career in order to support children).
How much of one's "identity" one has built on one area of life or another can affect how devastating a blow any "bad thing" is too.
Then, too, what shouldn't be overlooked is that some temporary and apparent set-backs don't mean the person hasn't gotten past them. - only that he hasn't gotten past them YET. Sometimes, too, if the person didn't care all that much about the particular failure in the first place, he'll just not bother trying to do better at the same kind of thing, particularly if the person has other areas of interest, talent, or "high-priority in life".
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