How do you deal with difficult people?

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  1. Super Lux profile image58
    Super Luxposted 7 years ago

    How do you deal with difficult people?

    if you have to interact with them everyday and they are such a pain, what do you do to avoid making things worse?

  2. WD Curry 111 profile image60
    WD Curry 111posted 7 years ago

    I load my pistol with a fresh roll of caps and run them out of town.

    1. Denise Handlon profile image85
      Denise Handlonposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      LOL I was thinking, "shoot 'em" but you beat me to it.  This was the best part of my day so far-just got off work after dealing with an obnoxious patient for 12 hrs to learn that my brother had a heart attack.  I needed this laugh.  Thanks!

    2. content4life profile image60
      content4lifeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      that's funny (lol)  like this answer

    3. Keith Engel profile image78
      Keith Engelposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Or you tell them to stay North

    4. Super Lux profile image58
      Super Luxposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      in short get rid of them once and for all? haha! i would love to try that smile

    5. IDONO profile image76
      IDONOposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I feel you, but remember, if you do that, you will be dealing with people that are a lot more difficult than them in prison.

    6. Express10 profile image88
      Express10posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      If only smile

  3. content4life profile image60
    content4lifeposted 7 years ago

    I've found that one of the best ways to deal with difficult people is to try and ignore them.

  4. IDONO profile image76
    IDONOposted 7 years ago

    It really depends on the situation you are in. If social, I'd avoid that person. If at work it depends if they are boss, equal, or subordinate. All require different response by you.  A boss, put up with it or quit. An equal, put up with it or bring in a moderator, (like your boss) to help try to resolve the issues. This atmosphere can't be productive. Subordinate, pull them aside, discuss the situation, then handle accordingly. It may help or termination may be only answer. We have to realize that many times a person is being difficult because we are being difficult ourselves. They fight fire with fire
         In a marriage, Hopefully you knew this up front. If you did, They're difficulty must have been worth it or you wouldn't have married them. So, you have to adjust and try to minimize difficult situations. Good luck with that.
         We all have to learn to try to deal with this because in general, we are all getting more difficult everyday. We have to be, just to attempt to keep up. Wish I could bottle the answer to that one!
         Every situation is different. We have to try to adjust to every situation we are in because of that. We can't change other people, so we  have to change ourselves to make life more bearable by being flexible.

    1. handymanbill profile image81
      handymanbillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Your answer is the best

    2. Keith Engel profile image78
      Keith Engelposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Aye, dealing with people as individuals is the best way to go and to view others.

  5. sarahcherbert profile image60
    sarahcherbertposted 7 years ago

    With kindness and compassion. From my experiences, most people are difficult because of how they feel about themselves, now because of how they feel about anything else. So if you show them kindness and compassion then they may take their guard down and lighten up a little.

  6. Larry Okeke profile image59
    Larry Okekeposted 7 years ago

    I think you should simply try to accept them the way they are. Expect them to do bad all the time and when they eventually do so, it wouldn't come as a shock to you.

  7. msorensson profile image76
    msorenssonposted 7 years ago

    Difficult people need, most of all, compassion. So look within and open your heart.

    1. Express10 profile image88
      Express10posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      You are so positive and kind. I find that I cannot always be kind because there are so many people in this world that truly will harm you at any opportunity. I see this everyday simply because of my beau's occupation and human nature can be sad &

  8. Ms Dee profile image87
    Ms Deeposted 7 years ago

    As they say, 'kill them with kindness,' and as some others have suggested. It tends to highlight their own behavior. You don't have to reference their behavior at all when doing this. However, if the difficult person turns to bullying, I may tell him/her in some way that I will wait to interact with them later, once they lose 'the bull'. Hard to say though without getting more specific about a situation.

  9. RealHousewife profile image70
    RealHousewifeposted 7 years ago

    I try not to interact with difficult - high maintenance people first by politely ignoring them.  If it's a coworker or a boss - each time the say something "difficult" I just use mirrored speaking.  I simply repeat what they said as a question, such as if they start out on arrant saying "I hate Mondays!". I would say "oh so you hate Mondays?". I just try to NOT say anything that can be made into an argument.

    Or if they say something like "the sky is fuscia not blue!" I'd say "oh the sky is fuscia? Hmm! Imagine that!" lol

  10. Laurin Gatewood profile image65
    Laurin Gatewoodposted 7 years ago

    Be patience, keep a low tone in talking and let them vent quietly....hopefully.

  11. gabgirl12 profile image69
    gabgirl12posted 7 years ago

    I am a difficult person actually. At least that's what I've been told. I don't mind all that much. But in 'dealing' with them, you just can't. Especially not in their territory. You just have to keep going and either ignore them or be consistently tough and not let your guard down. That is not always easy, especially if you are someone who can be considered 'nice' or someone they think they can push around.

    It's also wise to know their background. Do they have any kind of mental disorder? Emotional stress? Sickness? That can help you be more understanding.

    It takes practice but you cannot see them as 'making things worse'. You really aren't, they are just being difficult. And if you can't change them, change your attitude around them or change your environment.

    It also takes people to really care about them. Many a 'difficult' person is guarded and can see past any BS. They don't like hypocrisy and can come back with a vengeance unfortunately. Take it one day a time, that's how I do it. And that's how people have worked with me.

    1. pmorries profile image70
      pmorriesposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I once knew a lady who was very difficult(hated actually). One day,she pulled out a book titled How to Deal with Difficult People(everybody was stunned). Later,she told me that she did not know that she was difficult(I doubt you are that difficult).

    2. Super Lux profile image58
      Super Luxposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      i think it also helps if you try to put yourself in other people's shoes.what will they feel if you this or say that without them meriting it.most difficult people i knw,nt pertaining to you, has issues they cant face and vent it out to others.

  12. RebuildingJobs profile image58
    RebuildingJobsposted 7 years ago

    Smile a lot, publically. Sigh, privately, at times. If I can get a word in edge-wize, I might speak a humorous word. Always show impeccable work. Encourage and compliment where warranted and without favoritism. Always poised and friendly. What do you do when you are the man out: when those who are difficult and have positions higher than you have bullied or been unfriendly to you, favoring others over you?

  13. cruelkindness profile image73
    cruelkindnessposted 7 years ago

    Very carefully like a you would a child in there terrible two's.


    Cruelkindness (Subliminally Thoughtless)

  14. pmorries profile image70
    pmorriesposted 7 years ago

    I hope that I am not breaking any rules by saying this, but I wrote a hub telling one how to deal with difficult coworkers that you might find helpful. Most people will tell you to have  compassion for them, or that you should try to find out what makes them tick...so that you can relate to them. My counter argument is is that they would not spend a minute of their time trying to figure you out so that they could relate or show compassion. So, why not try a more affective approach (my tounge is in my cheek).

    1. pmorries profile image70
      pmorriesposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I meant effective not affective(sorry).

    2. Catherine Kane profile image85
      Catherine Kaneposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      not sure what you mean by more effective method..

      and figuring them out may give you more control of the situation, which is what you want. It isn't a question of equal work, as much as that of control...

    3. Express10 profile image88
      Express10posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I totally agree with the fact that most difficult people would not take a moment to give a care about you.

    4. IDONO profile image76
      IDONOposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Difficult people are extremely hard to get to know. If you can't get to know them, how do you figure them out? For more effective method, refer to WD Curry!

    5. Catherine Kane profile image85
      Catherine Kaneposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      IDONO, you can understand them by observing their behavior

  15. lovelypaper profile image63
    lovelypaperposted 7 years ago

    I try not to take offense and pray for them. I think you can be polite but firm and stand up for your position.

  16. Keith Engel profile image78
    Keith Engelposted 7 years ago

    What is a difficult individual? If you mean somebody who you disagree with, does that make them difficult? What is a difficult individual? If you mean somebody who you find annoying, does that make them difficult? What is a difficult individual? If it is somebody who asks too many questions, does that make them difficult? What is a difficult individual? If you mean somebody who is confident, does that make them difficult? If it is somebody who you envy, does that make them difficult?

    Shall I continue? With out knowing what makes or defines a person as difficult, and why it is you find them to be difficult in the first place, it is impossible to answer this question in any type of sensible fashion.

    1. Super Lux profile image58
      Super Luxposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      a difficult person is someone who seems to make everything you do tough, like someone who always sees your wrong and doesn't appreciate your effort,a bully in school,a negative person,a critic.someone who makes your life difficult.

    2. Keith Engel profile image78
      Keith Engelposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I guess you failed to realize the point I was making. Life if difficult, who we view as "difficult" people will vary. So actually, the proper way to view this is, is who isn't a difficult person to deal with. We are all difficult from time to time.

    3. Super Lux profile image58
      Super Luxposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      i get your point, but when i wrote the question, what i was pertaining to are the people who makes ur life difficult w/o u doing anything to them.like frustrated people who vents out what they feel to you w/o u doing them anything wrong.

    4. Keith Engel profile image78
      Keith Engelposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      You still don't get my point, people pertains to a group. What you are really asking is how do you deal with difficult individuals. Dealing with a group, hence people, is an entirely different question.

    5. Super Lux profile image58
      Super Luxposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      it's collective. there's even a book with the title how to deal with difficult people. u might want to read it.

  17. WebsiteConfetti profile image59
    WebsiteConfettiposted 7 years ago

    A great book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' by Dale Carneige answers just that. Don't be put off by the corny title it's a great read on how to diffuse situations with difficult people.  Even though it was written in 1936 it's still very relevant today

  18. Express10 profile image88
    Express10posted 7 years ago

    If I had to deal with them I tend to be cordial only when it was an absolute must. After being afflicted with the disease to please and always doing anything to avoid confrontation, I grew up and found that sometimes when you get pushed you have to push back. So if they ratchet things up on you, drop the nice-nice and tell them how you really feel.

 
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