Are counselors trustworthy? How could you expect them to extend personal counsel
Are counselors trustworthy? How could you expect them to extend personal counsel to you?
Sometimes they advice people lackadaisically with a lethargic expression. Sometimes they have a ruse that dupes you into giving them all of your personal details unwittingly, leading you into trouble and exposure. I guess we don't need counselors after all. I need to advice ourselves, to change ourselves from within; and not to fraternize with hypocritical people who do not really understand you.It depends on what problems you go to counseling for. If the counselors are certified, conduct tests etc. and analyze the report strictly according to the result, the chances are they are trust worthy or at least as trust worthy as the current levels of research in respective fields. However, the counselors that judge you off the cuff, use their instincts to judge etc. they are less trustworthy.
The answer to that would be the same as the answer to this; “Are people trustworthy?” Anser; Some are and some are not. If you are paying someone for a service, REMEMBER, you are always the boss, I don’t care what job they do or how knowledgeable you are about their profession. If you feel they are not serving your needs, you may un-hire them! You should never put someone 100% in charge of parts of your life without discerning all along whether they are suited, that includes doctors, dentists, mechanics,…everyone.
I think you have a misunderstanding of the role a counselor plays. If we could all 'fix' ourselves from within then there would be no need for outside therapists. However, many people do not have the knowledge and understanding on how to do that. Furthermore, MOST people are unaware of the areas that need improvement, which is within the subconscious. Our actions will often reflect hidden issues that we don't catch.
A counselor is a person first. The depth of their ability to engage in meaningful therapy is partially an intellectual one and partially one of personality-that is 'clicking' with their clients. Again, people have unconscious drives and issues. If a person has a 'problem' with a parental figure and meets a counselor who unconsciously reminds them of this parent a 'transference' of emotions can occur. In that case one can walk away feeling that they don't want to see that counselor, but not necessarily understanding why.
We meet with counselors and therapists NOT for advice. In fact, a good counselor refrains from giving judgement or suggestions for the client to follow. We meet with them as a sounding board and guide. Just as any traveler on a journey needs to have some type of map, the role of the counselor is to be that map and help direct the person seeking help in searching for the answers 'within', as you have stated.
When I hear of people trying to do the work by themselves, that is great-motivation and searching for answers is a wonderful tool. But, would you expect to build something with tools that you were not sure what to do with? Books are a great source of help, but if the issues run underground one may not even be aware of what to look for.
I like to think of the analogy of fixing oneself without outside help like an electrical current. A closed electrical current goes around and around and around in the same pattern. That is how man is-we get into a grooved pattern and repeat the same thing, perhaps in a variation, but still falling into the groove. The therapist or counselor is the 'breaker' that interrupts the pattern and helps to direct the flow of traffic out into another direction.
Don't be turned off by counselors. If you had a bad experience once try to give it another chance. All counselors are not the same. Search until you click with one. Perhaps a recommendation from someone, like a doctor? They do play an important role in mental health. Best wishes to you.Asking if counsellors are trustworthy is like asking if people are trustworthy. It's very general and can only be answered on a case by case basis. Some are, some aren't. Some are good at what they do, some aren't.
What a counsellor is supposed to do, is take the training and experience they have gained, and apply it to each case they try to help. Sometimes, just having someone to talk to about an issue is enough to help a person through their problems. Other times, more understanding of other situations is needed. These are when a counsellor might be in order.
In every case, counsellors are people too. They have their failings and see each case through their own filter of experiences. An individual counsellor is also limited in their ability to connect with a situation and empathize. Because of this, it's good to find a counsellor you can be at ease with.
It sounds like you have already made up your mind. You've even answered your own question. Very negatively. The way you've stated your "additional information", it sounds like you've had some bad experiences with a counsellor. I'd venture to guess either that; or you're insecure and justifying avoiding counselling. I did that for years.
If you truly want to be healthy in relationships with other people, outside help is necessary. Not because you can't fix yourself on your own. Because we are often blind to our own problems. Furthermore, without interaction, you cannot find all the problems you may have. A good counsellor is trained to spot these problems and help provide tools for coping. A great counsellor can also connect with you and help you be comfortable and safe sharing. No exposure should ever occur without your consent. And no trouble should ever come of it, unless you're breaking some law that they are required to report.
