What causes so many women to put the welfare of their abusive and/or less than r

Jump to Last Post 1-3 of 3 discussions (5 posts)
  1. gmwilliams profile image82
    gmwilliamsposted 4 years ago

    What causes so many women to put the welfare of their abusive and/or less than respectful husbands,

    boyfriends, committal partners, and significant others before the welfare of their precious children?
    It totally enrages me how many children suffer miserably, even murdered and maimed beyond repair,at the hands of abusive husbands, boyfriends, and/or significant others.Oftentimes, when the poor children complain, they are either ignored or blamed by the "mother."  Mothers are supposed to put their children first before anyone and this includes husbands, boyfriends, and/or significant others who are adults.Children are precious God-entities who are deserving of the utmost love/respect.


  2. profile image0
    Brenda Durhamposted 4 years ago

    I don't know what you mean by "God-entities",  but I sure do agree that children are precious and deserving of the utmost love and respect!

    I can answer your question in part, having gone through a small (compared to some) situation of this subject.   My children were subjected to verbal mocking, blatant uncaring, and having cigarettes touched to their skin.   I myself got punched in the face as well as mocked, accused, and manipulated.   (Since I'm telling personal information here, I must say that it wasn't my husband who abused anyone; it was a boyfriend I had after getting divorced).

    I was selfish and scared at the same time.  I was totally wrong.  Any initial attempts I made at removing my children from the situation were changed by my fear of even worse repercussions upon my kids or myself and my naivete in thinking the abuser would see the error of his ways and "straighten up" as he promised he would so.  My final attempt worked, by the grace of God, and actually culminated in legal prosecution of the abuser.   I've been forgiven, by my children and by God;  yet my guilt still stands in my memory as a reminder of what I should never tolerate again.

    And while in actuality the fault is only on the abuser,  there are reasons (not excuses, but reasons) that many women don't protect their children in situations like that.   Two are the ones I said already.   Others are confusion and a sense of helplessness that pervades the mind of many women who are manipulated and controlled by an abusive man (note----sometimes the tables are turned and it's the woman who is the abuser and who manipulates the man;  but usually of course it's the man).

    And a mother who perhaps has a rebellious child and can perceive that that child might be lying or manipulating......may be apt to place some blame on the child (if they're a teen or etc.) simply because she's not sure who's telling the truth!

    I myself knew my children weren't to blame for anything;  they were entirely innocent.    Thank God they forgave me and still love me!  And I thank God for giving me the strength to finally remove my children and myself from the situation, and the local Marshall and County Prosecutor for helping me make that permanent.

    Like I said, those are some reasons.  NOT excuses though!
    Thank you for posting about this subject.   I sincerely hope that mothers today are stronger and smarter than I was at first,  and will not tolerate anyone abusing their children for even one day!

    1. gmwilliams profile image82
      gmwilliamsposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      This is an important and timely question. So many children are abused and/or worse at the hands of abusive men, related or non-related.

    2. profile image0
      Brenda Durhamposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Yes it is, gmwilliams,  very important and timely.    .....women especially are too naive and think a person can be "fixed" by their love and tolerance.   As in alcoholism, etc.----women keep hoping the man will change if he has her love and help.

  3. profile image0
    Rad Manposted 4 years ago

    Please, lets not loose sight of the fact that it's not always men who abuse and hurt. Women can also cause emotional and physical trauma to both men and children. It's been my belief that the children should come first when parents separate for whatever reason. I think that starting a new relationship can send a message to the children that they are not first in the eye of the parent. In other words starting a new relationship will inevitable put the child off the pedestal.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)