Trump Translated, So His Cult Can Understand What His Lies Mean...

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   Valeantposted 4 years ago

   
   Here for your understanding of what Trump really means when he says something...the Trump Translator:
   "I did nothing wrong." = I was caught breaking the Law.
   "It was a perfect conversation" = They're willing to take the bribe.
   "Loyalty" = They support me until I blame them for what I did wrong.
   "I'm being treated very unfairly" = They're trying to make me accountable for my actions.
   "Jobs BLOWOUT, 303,000" = I inflate numbers to make myself look Great. I deflate them to not pay taxes.
   "Witch Hunt" = They're digging up evidence about my crimes.
   "NEVER TRUMPERS" = They're not the poorly educated deplorable supporters I love.
   "I'm not watching the hearings" = I'm too busy intimidating witnesses on twitter.
   "I shouldn't be impeached." = I've been breaking Laws all my life, why should I stop now?
   "I want nothing. I want nothing." = Repeating a lie enough times, they start to believe it.
   "I do whatever I want."= I've been since GOP are in my back pocket and they don't care.
   "They cheapened the importance of the very ugly word, impeachment." = I cheapened the Constitution by violating the LAW and they caught me.
   “A lot of people.” = Me.
   "Nobody knew" = Everyone knew except me.
   "Many People have told me" = Voices in my head and fictional people have complimented me.
   "A lot of people don't know" = I just learned something most people already knew.
   "Believe me" = I just lied.
   "In Fact" = I'm about to lie.
   “Experts say . . . ” = Sean Hannity said . . .
   “Everyone’s saying . . . ” = Someone in the Fox News comments section said . . .
   “I’ve been hearing . . . ” = Barr told me . . .
   “I’ve been seeing . . . ” = Ivanka showed me . . .
   “ We’ll see what happens.” = I have no idea what’s going to happen, but I hope it makes me look good or I hope you forget about it.
   "He's a great guy" = I will deny ever knowing this person after they begin to tell the truth about me.
   “He’s the perfect man for the job.” = He’ll be great at obliterating the department he’s heading.
   “He’s done an incredible job.” = He doesn’t lie as well as he used to, and may soon be fired.
   “He’s a disappointment.” = Due to his slavish devotion to ethics, he’s been fired.
   “He’s somewhat disappointing.” = I don’t like his beta-male looks and behavior, and, besides, he’s low-energy.
   "Loser" = someone who makes me feel inferior due to their talent or accomplishments.
   "Liar" = Someone telling the truth about me
   “Fake News” = something I said which has been recorded.
   “He’s doing an incredible job.” = He works for me, and he’s a terrific liar.
   “He’s a good kid.” = I don’t like his beta-male looks and behavior, but both Ivana and the paternity test say he’s my son.
   “He’s a good man.” = I don’t know the guy, but he’s right here in front of me, smiling.
   “He’s an excellent man.” = He may be smarter than me, but that does not make me dumber than him.
   “I have the best memory” = Do I have another rally today or am I going golfing?
   “I have all the best words.” = I cornered the market on some top-of-the-line monosyllabic words in a leveraged buyout.
   “Only I can get it done” = “If you think this country’s bad off now, just wait till I get through with it.” (re: Groucho Marx in Duck Soup – 1933)
   "The likes the world has never seen" = I have no idea what I just said but it sounded good.
   “It’s gonna be incredible.” = I haven’t thought about it—it’s in the future.
   “It’s gonna be fantastic.” = I briefly thought about it, but will forget about it once my circadian rhythm resets.
   “It’s gonna be terrific.” = I’ve passed it along to Congress, so blame them when it fails.
   "Policy Briefing" = Turning on Fox News.
   "MAGA" = Making my pockets fatter off the American taxpayers.
   "Huge" = moderate to below average in size.
   “It’s gonna be huge.” = It will be flashy and tacky.
   “It’s gonna be so huge.” = It will be flashy and tacky, with gold lettering.
   “Facts.” = 1. Statements not yet verified by conspiracy theorists. 2. Statements—often from scientists—with no profit motive.
   “Lies.” = 1. Statements about me colluding with Russia. 2. Un-airbrushed facts.
   “Sad” = 1. All-purpose, monosyllabic expression of distress, remonstration, condemnation, anger, frustration, pique, or calumny. If tweeted, “Sad” appears as a single-word sentence fragment, followed by an exclamation point. As an utterance, it is shouted as if one is an umpire. 2. Rare, archaic: sorrowful.
   “I’ve always been a good student.” = I attended school (sometimes).
   “I’m not being investigated.” = It’s not an investigation if the detective isn’t wearing dark glasses and a fedora.
   “Women.” = Blondes.
   “Nasty women.” = Women whose blondness has been revoked due to: a) childbirth; b) middle age; c) policy knowledge and/or general knowledge; d) court settlements; e) high-heel abstinence.
   “Americans.” = People in states that voted for me.
   “People.” = White people.
   “Fine people.” = White supremacists.
   “Those people.” = People in countries that I’ve never heard of.
   “Those ungrateful people.” = Black people.
   “Those happy people.” = People on islands surrounded by big water who are claiming to be Americans

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2. 85

   Kyler J Falkposted 4 years ago

   Thanks for the lulz, greatly appreciated.

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3. 59

   Live to Learnposted 4 years ago

   When I watch the left attack Trump,the man, without pause, I am reminded of Eleanor Roosevelt's comment on what small minds tend to focus on.

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      Randy Godwinposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Trump, the spoiled brat, don't you mean?

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         PrettyPantherposted 4 years agoin reply to this

         Now, Randy, Trump does nothing at all to elicit such criticism. Don't you know? He is the antithesis of small-mindedness. Get with the program. Sheesh.

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         Live to Learnposted 4 years agoin reply to this

         I know, I know. Talking about people is for forte. I totally understand.

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            Randy Godwinposted 4 years agoin reply to this

            Sure you do...

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4. 0

   PrettyPantherposted 4 years ago

   Randy, they don't care about the traumatized children. Asylum seekers are not law breakers yet their children are routinely separated and put in unclean and dangerous facilities for weeks on end. They try to equate it with the policies of the Obama administration but it is  not even close. Children were only separated from their parents if they were in danger and were only kept in those facilities for a day or two.
   
   It was not the same. That's why there have been six (seven?) deaths of children under Trump's policies versus zero under Obama's.
   
   They will keep trying to say they are equivalent but simply reveal their own craven need to turn their eyes from the systematic abuse of children by their chosen leader.

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   1. 59

      Randy Godwinposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Indeed, the Right has lost all sense of integrity and humanity in their party. But they do indeed try to justify it any way they can. Just like their role model in the WH.

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5. 74

   Valeantposted 4 years ago

   Meanwhile, over at the State of the Union...
   
   

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6. 85

   Kyler J Falkposted 4 years ago

   The comments in here are even funnier than the original post. Good job, OP, great thread.

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   1. 59

      Randy Godwinposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      It's a never ending game trying to get an answer from some folks, Kyler. Welcome to the monkey house!

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