Staying in bad relationships for the kids, is this a good idea or bad?

1. 69

   Mystique33posted 11 years ago

   Staying in bad relationships for the kids, is this a good idea or bad?
   
   So many people avoid getting a divorce or getting out of a bad relationship for the sake of the children. Do you think that it is healthy to stay with someone you don't love or get along with any more for the kids? Or is it better to separate and raise to children from to different loving homes?

   replyreport
2. 60

   alvilwposted 11 years ago

   Children are very susceptible to the energies of other people. They will most definitely pick up on the stress of a bad relationship-especially between the people they love the most. The negative energy and clear emotional distance between people is not something we can hide from the children, no matter how hard we try to fake it, and cover it up with false smiles and laughs. They are onto us about that stuff and when you are hurting, so are they. A bad relationship- no matter how each individual defines that- can have lasting effect . When you seperate from the stress, the emotional drag of a bad relationship you are getting your mind off the turmoil and pain and back to where it is free and you can focus your energy on being happy and giving the children the undivided love they need. If you are not soulfully happy they will not be either!

   replyreport
   1. 69

      Mystique33posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I agree we as parents sometimes do not give our children credit for being smart and observant. Sometimes staying in bad relationships can do more harm then good.

      replyreport
3. 72

   lburmasterposted 11 years ago

   I think it entirely depends on the relationship. If the children are being harmed during the marriage, it might be better. But if the children do not see any sign of a bad relationship then the parents get a divorce, it really messes with their brain. They have no understanding of why the divorce occured at all.
   That's what happened in my husbands family. Right when he went to college, his mother filed for divorce. It took ten years for him to talk to her again.

   replyreport
   1. 69

      Mystique33posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Wow! That's why this question is difficult to answer. It is not always easy to  tell what is right or wrong. Should you sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of the kids?  Or is your happiness just as important as theirs? Its a   tricky question.

      replyreport
4. 92

   peeplesposted 11 years ago

   Its better for children to grow up in two happy homes than one unhappy home. In my opinion it's that simple. If the home is not happy then it is not best for the children.

   replyreport
   1. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Very true!

      replyreport
5. 94

   Marketing Meritposted 11 years ago

   Depends what you mean exactly by a 'bad relationship.'
   
   If there is any physical or mental abuse taking place then couples should never stay together for the sake of the children. Living in such an environment will cause the kids more harm than good.
   
   If couples are able to live amicably under the same roof, whilst leading separate lives, then so be it.  It is their choice. However, I can't help feeling that, in later years, the kids may well feel a sense of betrayal, when the truth emerges.

   replyreport
6. 60

   yankeeintexasposted 11 years ago

   As much as I am pro-marriage we need to consider what in best for the children! I have seen children live between two homes, and live very happy as long as the parents remain a team for the children. If the parents can't workout the marriage and get divorced they MUST put their problems aside and support the children!

   replyreport
7. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   Staying in a bad or toxic relationship is not doing the children any favors. More often than not people use the kids as their excuse for not making a major change in their life. It's a case of them rather to stay with the devil they know than to start over again. Children deserve to be brought up in a loving happy home. If it's not possible within the confines of couple's relationship then they should split. Staying together in a negative environment will have an harmful effect on the children when they enter into their own relationships/marriage.

   replyreport