How do you tell your husband that you're depressed? Shouldn't he have noticed?

1. 58

   proud2bamamaposted 11 years ago

   How do you tell your husband that you're depressed? Shouldn't he have noticed?

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2. 94

   Susana Sposted 11 years ago

   Expecting your partner to be a mind reader is never helpful in a relationship! Be clear with him about what's going on for you.
   
   It might help you to write out some things you'd like him to know about how you're feeling before you speak to him. E.g.
   
   I'm struggling to cope with....
   I feel so sad/angry/negative all the time.
   I need some help/support with....
   I worry about....
   I'm scared that....
   
   Choose a time when you're not likely to be disturbed.

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3. 80

   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   Communication is the (GPS) for relationships and marriages. You have to (tell) someone what is bothering you. You're either growing together or growing apart.
   If it's not worth asking for then it's not worth having!
   Depressed people have a way of shutting the world out and then they convince themselves that no one understands them or they are all "alone".
   Another thing people tend to forget is: "You are responsible for your own happiness!" Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse. Our lives are for the most part the end result of the choices (we) made along the way. If you are unhappy with your choices you can learn to make better choices for yourself.
   If you want something different (you) have to do something different!
   When we change our circumstances change. The only cure I have found for depression is taking action. Even if you do as Susana S suggest by writing some things down. That's a start.
   There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: we either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. The beautiful thing about a door is it lets those who want in (in) and those who want out (out).
   Tomorrow is not going to be any different from today unless you do something different today. It's your life! Take the wheel!
   Best of luck!

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4. 0

   dashingmeposted 11 years ago

   Hello, Proud2bamama 
   For me it depends on the situation. Our relationship started as long distance  until we get married and i think that helps me to tell him when im sad or bored.
   
   When we get married my husband make agreement to me no matter how our feelings to each other turns bad to really express whenever we are ready after the missunderstanding issue before sunrise to talk and make peace.
   
   My husband knows that I will be sad, bored, stress and depressed as I was adjusting to married life. What he did he always take me out even just a simple errand, dinner, birthdays, and other places.
   By that I was able to realize that my husband really make an effort to make me happy and I have also do my best inreturn.
   
   However, during my depresion I have not lost my faith to God, I cling on Him to lighten my hearts burden to help me carry it through. It was a great feeling to pray, kneel, and cry to God and leave it all to Him.

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5. 60

   duffsmomposted 11 years ago

   In an ideal world, sure he should have noticed.  But he is only human.  A good marriage cannot depend on one partner reading the mind of the other partner.  We have to communicate, share, express.
   
   Sit him down in a quiet moment and tell him you need to talk to him. Tell him you are depressed, sad, overwhelmed - whatever you need to say.  If you want something from him, tell him what it is. It is not fair to expect your husband (wife) to know what goes on inside your head.
   
   If you are depressed, seek help, see your doctor.

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