A guy from work has asked me out via our email? What should I do?

1. 70

   stricktlydatingposted 15 years ago

   A guy from work has asked me out via our email? What should I do?
   
   I'm not interested in him.  I emailed him a short reply about a work matter, and when he emailed me back he asked me for my phone number and if I would go out with him.  I don't know him, I have only seen him a few times around the office.  I am definately not interested, but I haven't replied to him because he is working on a work project I am involved in, and I don't want to cause any problems at work, but it made me feel uncomfortable.

   replyreport
2. 68

   Sasha Sposted 15 years ago

   I'd suggest going up to him in person and (nicely) telling him that you don't believe in relationships in the workplace and that you'd rather just be friends... then run for the hills!
   
   On a side note, that guy really needs to be told that if you're going to ask someone out, don't do it by e-mail!

   replyreport
3. 60

   GAWjrposted 15 years ago

   If you are sure that the reason he asked you out is for romantic reasons:
   Go up to him in person and thank him for the gesture, and let him know you are flattered.  Then, you can tell him that a relationship at work usually leads to problems.  And, if it didn't work out between you two, then the two of you would end up seeing one other on a consistent basis at work, and that would make both of you uncomfortable.  If it did work out, it could also cause a conflict of interest at work.
   
   But, what are you going to do when there is a guy at work that you're interested in?
   
   To stop this from making you look like a hypocrite, I'd tell him that you're already in a "light" relationship, and going on a date with him would complicate things.  I'm sure he'll understand.
   You don't need to feel uncomfortable around him.  Try just talking to him about the usual stuff, and then you'd get to know him a little.  Then try telling someone you know about him, maybe they'll hit it off, and your problem is solved.

   replyreport
4. 60

   DawnnaBeeposted 15 years ago

   I know your not interested in him, & must go along w/GAWjr. but also remember when & if you are interested in some guy @ work
   "Never mix business w/pleasure" Hate to use a quote, but Jeez, it just 'fit' the situation for future reference! LOL! Yeah, I'd say just go talk to him, if ya already haven't... Take care, *Dawnna*

   replyreport
5. 58

   JayDee Sterlingposted 14 years ago

   First of all, don't get into any personal conversation via email on the company email, nor on company time.  IT is watching you.
   
   Second, even if you were interested, don't date people you work with.
   
   Third, you need to find out what the company policy is for co-workers and dating. He may have committed a serious infraction which is teetering on the edge of sexual harrassment and no HR department wants that. And even if their position on it is flexible, you can let him know that your policy is not. Don't allow him or anyone else to make you feel uncomfortable.  Especially when jobs are hard to keep and find.
   
   Don't say anything to him about his invitation, just ignore it and keep doing your work, if he is brassy enough to follow-up with another email, don't respond to that one either.  If he approaches you face-to-face, just simply say "No, but thanks for asking." And strickly stay to your work.   Best wishes

   replyreport
6. 60

   Dada_Philposted 14 years ago

   What is your personal style? Are you the old fashioned romantic or are you the new generation? Send Him a reply (from home and on your own time of course) and tell him how you feel.
   
   I personaly would email him back and tell him to ask you in person. He needs to "man up" and go "old school" when it comes to personal relationship. GAWjr makes some good points if you are looking from the male perspective.
   
   If it's your boss, that's something alltogether different.

   replyreport