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After 20 years why would a man still hate his exwife
My boyfriend is 63, has been divorced to his 2nd wife for 20 yrs. He still hates her, why? I understand from him she was constant cheat and was a lousy mother and still is. He got custody when they were 9 and 10 and has raised them. The are 30 and 28 now. He does say he loves me and we have been in a ld relationship for 9 months
I am not in this situation so I am only guessing, from outside looking in, but it seems to me that he hates her actions. Cheating is one thing but if she was a lousy mother, maybe he saw how it hurt his children to have to deal with it and it hurt him deeply. Because no matter what a child says or does, it does leave pretty big scars to have a mother who is not a constant in their life. And to be a parent watching your child hurting like this must have been a very hard thing to deal with. But I can kind of understand what you feel. I would feel like is there something I would ever do to make this man hate me this passionately. It's a scary thought I know.
I have heard people say that if you still have hateful feelings after you divorce, then you weren't ready for a divorce.
Yet, I have to agree with another answer given, he probably associated her with pain and grief, so her name/picture etc most likely sets him off.
Maybe it was a bitter divorce. Without knowing all the details maybe she took him for everything he was worth. Add to that, she cheated and was a lousy mother, I can't say I blame him for still harboring bad feelings. Top it off with a 9 and 10 year old involved - unfortunate !!!!!!!!!!
He is too committed to the past relationship with his exwife, my gut feeling.
A hatred feeling towards a person never emerges overnight.It takes years together when someone is tortured or pained by someone constantly. The feeling of hate against a particular person in fact never fades away and even after decades the bitterness persist in the mind of a human being.
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