Does the man or woman have the upper hand in a relationship? According to a rec

1. 52

   jengraefposted 13 years ago

   Does the man or woman have the upper hand in a relationship?  According to a recent study from...
   
   UT of Austin, men do...what do you think?

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2. 59

   tinawehaposted 13 years ago

   I think that most of the time the men do.  It's hardwired into women's genes to find a guy who will protect them and their offspring.  It's hard to let that go.  However, a woman is more likely to leave a marriage and men should never push things too far.

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3. 69

   sarascaposted 13 years ago

   Depends on who you ask and what their overall opinion of relationships is.
   
   A weak woman will say the man has the upper hand because he is the "breadwinner" and makes the rules to dictate how life will be in the household.  She defers to him in all matters and does not think for herself.
   
   A strong woman will say that neither person has the upper hand in a GOOD relationship (one of mutual love, respect, and honesty) and that both people share equally in any matters of "power" that arise.
   
   A woman who uses her body to manipulate weak men into giving her what she wants will say that she has the upper hand.
   
   A weak man will say the woman has the upper hand because she bosses him around and nags him into doing what needs to be done or what she wants done.
   
   A strong man with control issues and well-hidden insecurities will say that he has the upper hand because women should know their place and stay there.
   
   And it could go on and on...
   
   ...women have the upper hand because they have a vagina.
   
   ...men have the upper hand because they have a penis.
   
   ...women have the upper hand because they can call the cops at any time and lie to get the man in trouble and the cops will believe them.
   
   ...men have the upper hand because they are physically dominant and can intimidate a woman into being subservient.
   
   ...blah, blah, blah.

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4. 59

   tysandersposted 13 years ago

   It depends on the couple. I have the upper hand in my relationship and my mate loves that about me the most. In past relationships the man had the upper hand. I think it just depends on the nature of the relationship and knowing when the other person needs to be in charge.

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5. 53

   ADI78posted 13 years ago

   It depends on who needs who more. It has far less to do with gender than people think. If you can make your partner believe that you don't need them as much as they need you, then you have the upper hand, regardless of the nature of that need (money, security, emotional support etc).
   
   I was in a long term relationship with a woman who was strong, confident and generally in charge. Nonetheless, I had the upper hand because she believed that it would be easier for me to find someone else than for her. Whether that was true or not is beside the point - that she believed it is what gave me the upper hand.
   Because I don't like such imbalance, I made an effort to turn it around - which resulted in her becoming abusive. Difficult to get it right.

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6. 54

   Rolfensposted 12 years ago

   Either have the upper hand, or have the initiative. But I don't think anyone can have both. In my life, I tend to end up with none
   I'd say it depends on the person, even on the situation. For me, taking the initiative never worked much. Trying to keep the upper hand and have the women take initiatives seems to work better. But eventually they take the upper hand and then I'm toast - I guess I hate taking initiatives.

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