Can a man and a woman truly be just friends
I saw a video recently, where someone went out filming young men and women, asking this question. Without fail, all the girls answered yes and the boys answered no. However, when the girls were asked if their male friends would want to be intimate with them the answer was a resounding yes.
In mah point of u Men and women primarily want the same thing from their Friends: Friendship.Not all men want sex to be part of their Friendships. But men are much likelier to envision the potential—and twice as likely to act on it.
I think it’s easier to be platonic friends with when neither person is attracted to the another.
One of the main problems with men and women friendships are sometimes people befriend one another with a “hidden agenda”. Maybe they secretly hope given time the friendship will evolve into something more. In fact many women have been known to tell guys they want to take it slow or (start off as friends). In reality if she was (really into the guy) she would not want to risk losing him to another woman who is up front about wanting him to be her man.
Lastly but most importantly male/female friendships tend to dissolve after one or the other falls in love with their significant other. Often times their mate is not comfortable with their friendship. I can’t think of many women who would be fine with their man going out for drinks with another woman, bowling, lunch/dinner, daily phone calls, or going to a sporting event.
When people of the same sex do it then it’s called (hanging out with your friend). When people of the opposite sex do it then it is seen as a “date”. Another issue is most women and men don’t want to think of their mate pouring out their heart to someone of the opposite sex especially if it has to do with their relationship or marriage. Eventually most people choose to distance themselves from their opposite sex friend when they enter into a serious relationship or marriage. You don’t hear about many “life-long” friends of the opposite sex.
one of my longest and dearest friends is male to my female,... we talked about an intimate relationship in highschool,... but it just didnt feel right,... we lost track of each other over the years here and there, finding each other again and again,... even re-visited the idea of an intimate relationship based on a 20+ year friendsip,... but it stil felt stupid,..... we hang at the bar, he stays at my place or i at his,... he's single,.. i have a boyfriend of two years,... all is cool.
it happens,..... its just rare
Yes, I think they can be. I've seen the video and the problem with it is they were talking only about one other friend. Just because a woman has one male friend that has feelings for her doesn't mean her other male friends feel the same way. Also, people can hook up without have feelings for each other.
I've also seen that particular video and the thing I noticed was that all of the people interviewed were college students. It's a maturity thing, as you get older you are more likely to be more mature about friendships and relationships and, speaking as a chap, less likely to seek the latter in all of your friendships.
It seems to me that the girls in that video were all in agreement because women just grow up quicker.
I have a few guy friends that I have no sexual relationship with. Or even an implication of one. No tension or anything. So I would think it's possible, but it really depends on what type of person you are: I'm generally more comfortable around guys, so that might be a factor. Girls who are more comfortable around other girls might act differently around guys because of social constructs. Girls who hang out only with guys might be a little more flirty and not realize it. It's not to say that's always the case; but it seems to be the case often enough.
Long answer short, I think it is possible, as long as the attitude towards it coincides.
yes they can become true friends if there is some sincerity in their relation.
A small yes and a very big NO. In as far as the small yes, I have seen a few people who have mesmerized me with friendship that have lasted for years. I may not know if they have tried and failed to go the distance, or one of them was waiting for an opportune moment which never came. I also believe a few dedicated men in the clergy can actually hung on to friendship with women. But these are few. A dedicated man of God usually has a busy schedule, is very happily married and dedicated to his work of God.
As for the big NO, sizable number of friendships are based on deceit, with one or both partners weighing on possibilities of eventually getting closer to the other. And of course after a prolonged friendship it gets harder to open up to love matters. Surprisingly, some partners who entered the friendship with motives of a serious relationship opt out and lose interest after some time. The magic is not there anymore. But still the curiosity remains and casual sexual unity always results.
no..not all...some may fall in love with each other when they were always together...
The true answer is...
YES. Absolutely. It is very easy for members of the opposite sex to be just friends.
The reason we feel this is a tough question to answer is because, for alot of individuals, opposite sex friends are immediately considered possible mates and the individuals with this perception allow this outlook to get in the way of the possibility of true friendship.
When we are young, the opposites of our sexes are based on our upbringing and mostly don't become a factor in deciding friendships. Granted, boys like boy stuff and girls like girl stuff, and in most cases, either sex is not attracted to the other simply because of sexual expectations imposed on kids. With this imposition removed, the differences are rather mild and friendships are easier.
As kids move up in age to pre-teen, the impositions are easier to ignore and this age area opens up for quite a few opposite sex friendships.
Now, the teen years is where situations can start to become questionable. Changes in the body and attractions to the opposite sex go haywire. Many who could be friends before begin to question attractive elements and can no longer "just be friends."
This is not always the case, though, it depends on the individual and their comfortability in their sexuality as well as being able to discern themselves responsibly enough to maintain a friendship as being just a friendship.
Becoming adults, the road to maturity is broadened - on one side, a person can decide to be mature, where as on the other, maturity takes a back seat and a person decides that, now that they've reached adulthood, they can do whatever they want. Unfortunately, most don't mature for a while, if ever.
Once the obvious is confronted, a friendship can be just that. I've seen proof of interactions between friends that don't involve their sexuality past the point of he being him and she being her.
In the long run, people just need to grow up.
Yes, I think so they can be the best of friends, but may play around a little...becasue if the friendship is really strong then you tend to develop some feelings for the person..may be for a short span of time!
If she is god dame ugly or old enough to be your mum, then sure, why not. It is kind of unfair to ugly girls, but they usually get stuck in the friend zone, even if she is a very nice girl, because guys prefer girls with both outer and inner beauty, while looking for a sexual mate.
Yes - 15 years of me and my best friend who is a male, until FEMALE came along and was jealous of our friendship. Now on the hunt for a new male best friend now.
Absolutely it is all a maturity and trust level. I have many guy friends who are just that guy friends. My spouse has many girls who are just friends.
Yes, I think there are a lot of platonic relationships. I've had a lot of female friends that I never considered marrying when I was single. I think common interests and missions also drive people together, not just romantic chemistry.
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by mega1 8 years ago
How does it work for you? being "just friends" with a member of the opposite sex. Especially when that person is very, very attractive. I mean HOT! Can you maintain a friendship like that, and how do you do it? Or if you never have had a friendship like that, why...
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