What do I do?

  1. selene383 profile image59
    selene383posted 6 years ago

    What do I do?

    There is a guy that I like...well...I can actually say love. Never been in love before. I am scared and also somewhat confused. I want to tell him but I just don't know how. I am very nervous. I also run. I have never been in a relationship for longer than two weeks. I have commitment issues and don't know how to handle them. My main problem is the physical contact. It is uncomfortable and just plain awkward for me. I can't relax. Hugging is hard for me, And my emotional status....well I don't have one. I am anti social and have a hard time expressing myself.

  2. BizGenGirl profile image89
    BizGenGirlposted 6 years ago

    The first step is to sit down and figure out what forms of affection you are the least uncomfortable with, and which ones are way outside of your comfort zone. Write them all down, then start with the lighter stuff. Eye contact, the brush of a finger across your arm, sitting close to each other. Then graduate to other forms of affection little by little, and remind yourself when doing so, that absolutely no human being can stay in a state of Anxiety or Fear forever. This is true for all humans and there are no exceptions. I work with some people through my coaching, who have severe anxiety and/or ocd, and the one thing that we usually fail to remember, is that our minds are not made to sit in one emotional state for to long. Allow yourself to be hugged, then hug someone else, but hold the hug. Hold it through all of your anxiety and discomfort, because eventually those feelings will fade. When they fade away, you'll know how you really feel about physical contact and similar forms of affection, and I'd imagine you'll probably enjoy them.

    As for telling your man that you are in love with him, I would wait for the actual words. Either wait until you've been together for a year, or until he says it first. When you've only been together or known each other a short while, it's easy to mistake elation for love. That being said, not saying the words, doesn't mean you can show him you care. For men, the best expressions of love are through actions. Cook him his favorite dinner once in a while, buy him some shirts or make him some "love coupons" for together activities that you're comfortable with.

    If you'd like any additional advice, or just someone to chat with occasionally, I'm usually available http://coaching.bitwine.com/advisors/51 … strategist  smile

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)