Is it easy for someone to regain your trust once they have hurt you?
Trust is like a fragile glass. It can be fixed once broken but will never be as beautiful and perfect like it was before. Sad but true.
I agree dailytop10 - thanks for stopping by and keep hubbing!
Truth be told I have MAJOR and I do mean MAJOR trust issues. It's been that way since I was a child. I'm working on it but haven't accomplished any big hurdles yet. Sad but true. The only good part is I stay away from relationships so they don't have to try and tear down my wall and get hurt in the process:)
I'm the same way Charlu -so I completely understand.
Yes. If it's a family member, it's easy for me to forgive. After forgiving the person. I'll unconditionally trust that person all the way up to the moment they hurt me again. Then, I'll forgive again and trust again. It's hard for me to hold a grudge against relatives. BUT, if it's anyone else, I'll forgive them, but I don't keep them in my life. I do all I can to make sure they are not in a position to hurt me again. I don't go out of my way with a grudge against them; I just don't let them in my life again.
Wow MarleneB - they gain 100% trust back - that's great if you can do that - but are you leary about their future actions or do you just keep an open mind?
It depends if that someone is sincere and sorry and has learnt from their mistake. Trusting them again will be difficult but can be slowly earned,
Not at all. It becomes difficult for me to even keep that person as a friend. To trust them? Maybe after a year or two of being friends again.
Thank you lburmaster for your comment - I have found lately that I had to let a few relationships go because of lack of trust.
I've been told I shouldn't be so painfully honest, when answering this question......but I disagree. I'm of the belief that people should know us well. We shouldn't pretend or gloss things over. Being honest with our emotions is a vital part of the workings of any relationship.
I will always trust my children, regardless of any ups & downs. My love and devotion to them is totally unconditional and EXCLUSIVE.........As for "others?" It is pretty much a fatal mistake to betray my trust. I do not easily excuse or forgive disloyalty and/or deceit. I adhere to the adage: "Fool me once, shame on you.....fool me twice, shame on ME." I'm not inclined to approve 2nd chances to those outside my own loved ones.....I clearly learn realistic lessons, the FIRST time around.....
Thanks fpherj48 -i only gave one person 3 chances and their actions never changed.
That depends. I've had wives or significant others run around with other guys--sometimes a LOT--and that's not a problem for me. I don't consider "cheating" to be a trust issue, unlike the vast majority of other people out there. So in that case, there's not even any need to "regain" my trust as it has never been "lost" (because I've not been hurt).
However, if it's what I consider a deeper issue, then it's One and Done. Forever.
What's a deeper issue? Well, for example, let's say a supposed friend of mine decided to go around badmouthing my wife. Not only is he permanently off my friend list, but from that point forward unto eternity, he'll not only never regain my trust, but his health will benefit any time he sees me coming down the sidewalk and crosses the street to the other side.
It is never easy to regain the trust and will take time. Even then it wouldn't be of a degree as that of first time..
Once trust has been broken I am leery of that person, especially if I thought they were someone that I could trust without question It would be a disappointment but I could never trust them again.
I would have to say it's not easy at all but it can be done. For me it takes a lot of patience and time.
Some people have a two time rule...I have a one time rule. First you earn my trust (which takes a while). If you ever have my trust and break it I will never trust in you again. So far my mistrust has been proven to last a decade and longer, I have a very long memory for betrayal.
I have the one time rule also - people start out with the same amount of trust, as far as my armspan is -just like i was giving a big hug-eventually when they lose my trust /break my heart/ do me wrong -my hands are folded -crossing my heart
by FlowOfThought 11 years ago
If someone breaks your trust, what do they have to do to regain it?
by tiggums2001 13 years ago
i have lied to my husband over our finances more than once. How can I regain his trust and stop...the lying? He is fed up and wants me to fix this.I just don' t know what to do.
by COCOBEWARE 3 years ago
Would you leave your spouse if he/she only cheated once? Where do you draw the line?
by Carolee Samuda 7 years ago
How do you fix a relationship whose trust has been broken by infidelity?
by R9139 7 years ago
Could you forgive a friend if they stole from you?
by These eyes 4 years ago
Why do men hurt the person they love? If they love a woman why they do crazy things?I have a good relationship with this man and he just admit that he was having an affair that he wants to continue seing that person. I never see this coming since everything was so great with us. We never have a big...
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